


Rockstar's Daughter

by mixedupturnedaround



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Doctor Clarke Griffin, F/M, Medical, Musicians, Platonic Cuddling, Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy, rockstar - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:15:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 47,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22154641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mixedupturnedaround/pseuds/mixedupturnedaround
Summary: Bellamy and Clarke were childhood sweethearts until one day when Bellamy abruptly up and leaves to go on tour with his band. Bellamy may have left her, but Clarke soon realized she wasn't alone. What happens, when after four years he comes crashing back into her life?
Relationships: Bellamy Blake & Clarke Griffin, Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin
Comments: 188
Kudos: 468





	1. Chapter 1

Clarke Griffin stood amidst the chaotic Emergency Room collecting herself from the previous patient. The stench of saline and rubbing alcohol invaded her senses leaving little room for any fresh air. Seeing the head nurse Maya at the nursing desk, she made her way over to check-in.

"Hey Maya, anything to report?"

Maya's gaze lifted from the paperwork in front of her to smile warmly back at the Resident Surgeon.

"Nothing too out of the ordinary. Dr. Wells is finishing the surgery on the last bus accident victim now, so at least that situation has settled a bit. It was crazy there for a minute. I didn't know if we would have enough hands to help all those poor people."

"It was definitely challenging, but everyone really pulled together as a team. I hope there won't be anything like that tomorrow"

"Absolutely."

Overhead the ER intercom buzzed on and a voice spoke over the commotion. "Incoming accident victim, 2 minutes out."

Springing into gear Clarke washed her hands before grabbing a new set of gloves and a cover for her scrubs. She was at the door with 30 seconds to spare taking a deep breath before the ambulance arrived. A silent moment passed and then the ER doors burst open: the paramedics rolling in a woman on a stretcher.

"Female 25, Octavia Blake, multiple lacerations, suspected internal bleeding, and a compound fracture of the right arm!"

It was if all the air had been suddenly sucked out of the room. Clarke fought to keep her bearings as she remembered the last time she heard that name.

*4 YEARS PRIOR*

Clarke opened the door to the quaint cafe and began scanning the room for that familiar head of dark curly hair. Finding him seated at a table in the very corner she hurried to hug him tightly. As soon as she pulled away from the hug he grabbed her face and kissed her like she was the air he’d needed his whole life. The kiss was over before she could even process what was happening and he took his seat.

Noticing the look of sorrow in his eyes a nagging pit began to grow in her stomach.

Trying to shake it off she asked “ Hey babe, I hope you weren’t waiting too long. How’d the meeting go this morning?”

“ The meeting went really well actually. They decided to sign Grounders.”

The news seemed great, but the forlorn look in Bellamy’s eyes told another story.

“ That’s amazing Bell! This is what you’ve always wanted!...” Clarke’s enthusiasm faded when it wasn’t reciprocated. “ Why aren’t you excited.”

“ There’s just a small stipulation.”

“ I’m sure it’s not that bad, whatever it is we can get through it together.”

Pain danced in his eyes as he stood up suddenly from the table.

“That’s just it Clarke. The stipulation is that they can market me as a single bachelor.”

“ That’s ridiculous! You said no, right?” Even to Clarke, her question didn’t hold any hope, but she wasn’t ready to give up.

“ I’m sorry Clarke, but I took the deal. I just wanted to see you in order to say goodbye.”

It was if she’d literally been hit by a bus. The pain of his statement breaking every part of her into pieces. Anger welled up in its place.

“ NO! I won’t accept that!”

A tortured look danced across Bellamy’s features before it was replaced by a cold, and heartless mask.

“ Don’t make this worse Clarke. I’m leaving. You know you were never as important to me as my career. Just deal with it. I have to go. Goodbye.”

Clarke reached desperately for his hand to stall him. This wasn’t the Bellamy she knew! There’s no way this was happening to her.

She caught him by the fingertips and he stilled, briefly dropping his head before pulling from her grasp and all but running out of the cafe.

Shock didn’t begin to describe what Clarke was feeling. She stood up as if in a trance and numbly walked to her car. She didn’t stop driving until she reached her adopted brother Murphy’s house.

Murphy swung open the door to see her standing there. He started to ask why she was there before sensing her state and ushering her inside.

Clarke could hear him talking but it was all muddled. Murphy sat her down on the couch and looked directly at her. Shaking her gently he asked “Clarke! You’re scaring me! What’s going on?”

It took all she had to whisper “ Bellamy left me.”

“ No Clarke, there has to be a misunderstanding. He wouldn’t..”

“Strength filled her voice as she all but yelled. “NO! He did! He left because of the band and said I was never that important to him!”

Hearing the words coming from her own mouth made the walls close in. She couldn’t find any air to breathe. The house began to spin as reality became distorted.

Murphy yelled vaguely in the background and she could faintly recognize him trying to snap her out of it. The next thing she knew smelling salt was in front of her and the sour stench brought her back to reality. Clarke blinked up at Murphy who’s face was consumed with concern.

“Thanks.”

“ Clarke you are lucky I just bought those! You could’ve died. I need you to stay with me ok?”

Nodding numbly, she muttered an apology as they lapsed into an exhausted silence. A few hours later they sat with Chinese takeout in front of them and Murphy finally spoke up.

“So what do you want to do now?”

“ Well I have graduation in two days and then I want to get as far away from here as possible. I’m gonna call Jaha and take him up on his offer to work with him at ARK Memorial.”

“ Ok so when do we leave?”

Casting a confused look in his direction she clarified “ I’m going to go, but I can’t ask you to upend your life for me.”

“ Guess it’s good that you aren’t asking then. Clarke, you know you need me and besides, there’s a ton of tech jobs I can get up there in cybersecurity.”

Tears welled up in her eyes as she smothered him in a hug.

It was until after graduation that Clarke finally broke down and cried and she didn’t stop crying for what felt like hours. The very next day they had all their stuff in a moving truck and were headed off to New York.

*PRESENT*

“DR. GRIFFIN! We need you here now!”

Maya’s yell broke Clarke out of her reverie causing her to jump into action and assess the situation. Octavia required immediate emergency surgery if she was going to make it so Clarke led the way to the OR.

She paged all other doctors but no one that had the necessary experience was available. Sighing deeply she erased the memory of Octavia and went in with a clear mind. The surgery lasted for 6 hours but all went relatively well and Octavia was rolled into recovery.

Clarke collapsed against the wall and started sorting through the day's hectic events. That’s where Dr. Wells found her when he finished with his own patient.

“Clarke? Are you alright?”

“Besides the fact that I just spent six hours sewing up my Ex’s baby sister whom I didn’t even know still existed, I’m just dandy.”

“ They told me what happened. If any other doctor had been there she probably wouldn’t have made it. You saved her life.”

“ I know, and it’s all so shocking that I can’t even feel proud of it.”

“It’s gonna be alright Clarke. You can handle him now. Don’t let his being here scare you. Look what all you’ve come through.”

Ice flooded her veins as she processed Wells’ words.

“Bellamy is HERE?”

“ Yeah, I thought you knew already.”

“No! No, no, no, no, no! I can’t deal with this tonight! Wells, can you please take care of her for tonight? I have to get home.”

Wells leveled a disappointed but understanding look her way before sighing.

“ I’ll handle it for tonight, but you can’t hide from this forever. He’s here now and he deserves to know the truth.”

Standing up angrily Clarke snapped “ Not if I can help it! Thanks for helping with Octavia, but keep those opinions to yourself!”

Without another glance, Clarke slipped out of the OR and headed into the lockers to shower and change. She only lingered briefly in the steaming water to let it rinse off the day before hastily dressing.

A quick three-minute walk later and she arrived at her destination. Saying a quick hello to the nursery worker Clarke gently picked up her 3-year little girl with long curly black hair and went home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Bellamy was in the middle of talking to Monty when his phone rang sharply. Silencing it quickly, he thought nothing of it, but when it rang again this time he pulled it from the back pocket of his black skinny jeans. Glancing at it, he saw an unknown number but something in his heart told him he needed to answer.

“Hello.”

“ Is this Bellamy Blake?”

“ Yes, this is he.”

“ Sir you are listed as an emergency contact for an Octavia Blake. Is that correct?”

Fear gripped his entire being as the world seemed to still. He couldn’t help but explode with “Is she ok? Where is she?”

“Sir we need you to remain calm but your sister Octavia Blake was in a serious car accident and was transported to ARK Memorial hospital in New York City. “

“ I’ll be there right away!”

Bellamy hung up and yelled at the band “ GUYS! Octavia was in an accident we have to go right now!!”

Shock and in-trepidation filled the room as everyone hurriedly grabbed their belongings and ran to their vehicles.

Bellamy drove as quickly as he could without getting into an accident and he almost skidded into the hospital parking lot due to the high speeds. Jumping out of his G-Wagon he slammed the door and sprinted inside to the nurses' station.

“MY SISTER! Is she ok?”

Several nurses were startled by his outburst and even more surprised at who was standing there but a sweet brunette turned to him immediately lifting a calming hand.

“Sir, I need you to calm down. I’d love to help you. What is her name?”

Not even caring to look foolish he blurted “ Octavia Blake! She was in a car accident!”

“Ok, she’s in surgery at the moment. We won’t know the extent of her injuries until the surgeon finishes. I’m not at liberty to discuss any more details until the resident gives me permission. For now please have a seat in the waiting room and I promise we will come to get you just as soon as we can.”

“ Please, anything else you can tell me now?”

“I’m sorry sir, I can assure you she’s being well taken care of. Dr.Griffin is one of the best surgeons we have.”

Bellamy’s mind seemed to awkwardly jump over the name Griffin only briefly shaken before brushing off any insane notions that it’s the same, Griffin.

“Ok. As soon as you hear anything, please come immediately!”

“I can promise you we will tell you all as soon as we hear the slightest bit of information.”

Accepting that for now, Bellamy turned to see the rest of the band crowded around him at the counter. He hadn’t even recognized their arrival until now. Miller wrapped a comforting arm around his shoulder and led him to the nearest seat.

Tears filled his vision and he couldn’t even think straight. “I don’t know what I’d do if she doesn’t make it.”

Miller spoke up sternly. “ No, you can’t think like that! Octavia is a fighter. She will be fine!”

“ Yeah, I just don’t know how to think.”

“Think about everything you both have dealt with, like your mom. Octavia is strong! It’s gonna be ok.”

A lightbulb flashed in his head. “MY MOM! I have to call her and let her know what’s going on!”

This time Monty spoke up. “Not yet, you don’t know anything and you will just worry her.”

“You’re right I don’t want to overwhelm her. She’s just now getting back to her old self after cancer.”

The group nodded in agreement and then it was silent. Bellamy’s mind couldn’t help but drift back to a happier time.

* 7 YEARS EARLIER *

The high school lawn was decorated in white and yellow flowers all exactly the school colors. White chairs had been arrayed neatly and beautifully with a black stage in the front.

Just then the announcer called

“Octavia Blake!”

The beautiful young lady in question appeared on the steps before gleefully walking across the stage to get her diploma. Bellamy took the best photos he could and then slid out of his chair to congratulate the youngest Blake.

As soon as her eyes landed on her big brother Octavia ran full force jumping into his arms.

“I’m so proud of you O! It didn’t come easy but you pushed through!”

She smiled gratefully as he set her back on the ground.

“Thanks, old man!”

Now it was Bellamy’s turn to laugh at her antics. Then out of the corner of his eye, a flash of blonde appeared and then squealing followed.

Clarke pulled away from his little sister and presented a dozen white roses.

“These are from Bell and me! We love you so much!”

“Awe! You guys! They’re beautiful!”

Clarke smiled before stepping to her rightful place at his side. They always seem to fit together like a puzzle piece.

Bellamy was filled with a sense of completeness. His sister and mom were doing well and he had an amazing girlfriend who was studying to be a doctor.

“I’m so glad you were able to come today! I didn’t know if you were gonna be able to drive down from Boston or not.”

“ How could you ever doubt that? Bellamy and I are so proud of you, we wouldn’t miss this for the world!”

“Still though, thank you! It means more than you know! On another note though, where’s mom?”

This time Bellamy spoke up to answer his sister’s question. “She was here for the whole graduation a blubbering mess as you know, but she had to leave right after to finish getting all the food ready for the party tonight.”

“ Yeah, I figured! Are you all gonna be able to stay?”

“Absolutely! We will see you at the house, so go hang out with some of your friends until then!”

“Sounds good! See you later!”

With a flash of her hair, she was running off to be the social bee that she always was, leaving Bellamy and Clarke to themselves.

Smiling down at his girlfriend he steered them towards the parking lot.

“That was such a great graduation don’t you think?”

Bellamy laughed thinking back to their own graduation.

“Yeah definitely not like ours, or at least the part we were there for.”

“Hey! We stayed for the diplomas! That’s all that matters!”

“Whatever you say, princess.”

Clarke beamed up at him and he bent down to capture her lips in a soft and loving kiss. His whole world seemed all but perfect.

*PRESENT*

Memories of Clarke always brought a bit of calm to his mind, but on the flip side, they were always laced in the sadness of it’s ending.

Looking around the waiting room Bellamy took in his surroundings. Lincoln was in the far chair bouncing his knee nervously, tear tracks dried onto his face. Monty and Jasper sat huddled over a video game obviously trying to not think about the situation. Miller sat solemnly eying the ER door and monitoring other people in the room. Seeing Bellamy looking up Miller stood from his seat and walked over.

“You need to eat something so I’m gonna go to the cafe and grab food with Monty and Jasper for you and Lincoln. I’m not asking if you want it, I’m telling you so you’ll know where we are if any news comes.”

Resisting the urge to argue that he wasn’t hungry Bellamy just uttered a quick “Thanks” before lowering his hand into his hands.

He must’ve dozed off briefly because the next thing he knew the guys were all back and Jasper was nudging his knee with a sandwich. Jerking his head up quickly he hurriedly asked “Did I miss it? Did they say anything?”

Monty as calm as ever offered a simple shake of his head.

The tension in his shoulders released a bit as his heart rate slowed down from the moment of worry and that turkey sandwich seemed to stare at him until he finally relented about 45 minutes later.

Finally, around 1:00 AM that same nurse came through the door. The boys all jumped to their feet and all but ran to her.

Not taken aback by the behavior at all the nurse announced “Octavia is out of surgery and in recovery. It was touch and go there for a little while but the doctors expect a full recovery. Now the next 24-48 hours are absolutely crucial and she will be in ICU for at least that long but more likely the next 72-96 hours.”

The breath he’d been holding almost seemed to burst from his lips and he asked: “Can we see her?”

“I can only take one of you at a time.”

“ Take me.” Bellamy shot Lincoln a quick look before adding “ I’ll have her get you next. I just need to see her for a second before I call my mom.”

Lincoln nodded in understanding and then Bellamy turned to follow the nurse, Maya who introduced herself while walking. They reached the ICU and Bellamy saw her through the glass.

Quickly stepping inside he stopped down by the bed to kiss Octavia’s hand. Her face was black and blue and her abdomen was wrapped in gauze. Her right arm also had a thick cast, as well as her fingers, had stints. The sight was almost too much for him but he watched her heartbeat on the monitor and steeled himself that was all that mattered.

After a few minutes with her, he stepped out of the room and asked for Lincoln to be called while he called Aurora.

Dreading this call he dialed her number.

“Bellamy?”

“Hey, mom.”

“What’s going on? Why are you calling this late?”

“Listen, she is ok but I needed to call and tell you that Octavia was in an accident. They took her to Ark Memorial where she underwent surgery and she’s now in recovery.”

An audible gasp could be heard on the other side and his mother's voice came back through the phone tearily

“She’s gonna be ok though? My baby will be ok, right?”

“They are hoping for a full recovery but the next 24-48 until we are in the clear.”

“Ok I’m gonna grab my stuff and I will be there in about three hours.”

“I’ll see you then mom, I’ll keep you updated. I’m not gonna leave her side.”

“I know you won’t my strong boy! I love you! I’ll see you soon.”

“I love you too.”

With that, the line clicked and he returned his phone to the pocket. Seeing Lincoln in with his sister he decided to walk over to the nurses' station and plead to let them both stay. They finally relented but only after he’d told them that Lincoln was her fiancé not just her boyfriend and promised one of them an autograph.

Lincoln looked up surprised to see him and so Bellamy explained in hushed tones the arrangement he’d made for them.

Just a few moments had passed when there was a soft rap on the glass. Looking up Bellamy tried not to gape at the doctor on the other side. Wells motioned for them to come into the hall. Bellamy's mind struggled to keep up with all of the shocking things he'd dealt with today. Seeing Wells was definitely not something he would have ever imagined in a million years.

As soon as Bellamy and Lincoln had cleared Octavia's doorway, Bellamy blurted “Wells? What are you doing here?”

“ I’m actually a surgeon here at ARK and I’m coming to give you an update for Octavia.”

It wasn't until Wells said the word surgeon that Bellamy noticed Wells scrubs and lab coat. At the mention of his sister though, Bellamy didn't care to talk about anything else. "How is she doing?

“ Octavia suffered from a punctured lung and several broken ribs which had to be repaired in surgery. She also broke her right arm and all four fingers. We had to install some screws to keep the bone together. We will do a secondary procedure in a couple of weeks to remove the screws. She should be ok but we want to monitor her very closely for any signs of more internal bleeding or infection. We are hoping for the best but as I’m sure they told you these next 24 hours will be the indicator of how she’s doing. For now, we have her heavily sedated until her body can recover from the trauma.”

“Ok. Is there anything I should watch for?”

“ For tonight you need to let the nurses do their job and just keep an eye out for any seizures.”

“Absolutely.”

“Let the nurses know if there’s anything you need. I’ll be on call all night, for now, I’m gonna try to rest a bit before rounds.”

Bellamy nodded and Wells turned around to leave. Before he could go Lincoln interjected

“Thank you for saving her life.”

Freezing momentarily before turning around to respond “ Don’t thank me, I’m just giving you the update. Clarke is the one that saved her.”

Bellamy felt electricity run down his spine and he looked up sharply.

“Clarke? As in Clarke Griffin?”

“ That’s the one. You can thank her tomorrow morning when she comes to check on Octavia. The best thing to do is to try and get some rest.”

Without another word Wells turned on his heel and disappeared down the hall, leaving a stunned Bellamy to gawk in his wake. Lincoln’s hand wrapped around Bellamy’s shoulder as he directed him back inside Octavia’s room to the closest chair.

Bellamy’s mind was absolutely reeling. His sister was one thing but now the love of his life who he hadn’t seen in 4 years would be there in less than 12 hours. There was no way he could sleep now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please Comment what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s taken so long. Life is crazy busy. I can’t promises updates any specific time but know I’m working on it as much as possible. As always please comment. THANKS

Clarke's alarm buzzed incessantly, groaning she fumbled for her phone before turning off the offending noise. Opening her eyes and getting up she reached over onto the nightstand and flipped on the lamp. It took her tired eyes a moment to get used to the light as she squinted awkwardly trying to wake up. Once she was awake she slipped out of bed careful not to wake her little girl who had ended up sleeping in her bed the night before.

****3 _YEARS PRIOR**_**

_Clarke_ was three days past her due date and everything had become a strenuous task. She was in the middle of doing the dishes when a sharp pain tore through her abdomen. Trying to steady her breathing the best of her ability she gripped the counter so tightly that the counter edge was starting to indent her fingers. After a solid minute with very little relief, Clarke yelled "MURPHY!!"

At first, she'd fought Murphy on him living with her and the baby. She'd argued that he shouldn't have to be up every night with cries. It hadn't even really been a discussion, because Murphy refused to budge on his viewpoint. At this moment though Clarke had never been more grateful for her brother's stubbornness. 

The man in question came bounding around the corner and slid into the kitchen.

"Is it time?"

"Something's wrong Murph. This isn't a contraction! We need to leave now!"

Sensing her panic and worry-filled tone Murphy sprung into action walking her down to his car and driving them to the hospital. The drive there was tense. Clarke clutched onto the silver music note necklace Bellamy had given her tightly. It always calmed her down from panicking.

Failing to swallow it down, a sob broke free from her throat.

"We will be there soon Clarke, the baby will be ok."

"I want Bellamy!"

"I know, I'm sorry. You just have to focus on staying with me right now."

Luckily they only lived 3 minutes away because Clarke wanted to live close to her work. Murphy guided her out of the car before quickly ushering them inside the ER.

"Someone HELP! Something is wrong with the baby!" The pain in Murphy's voice was evident and Clarke cringed trying to not let it worry her more that Murphy was more upset than she'd ever seen him. He was even numb when they had found out about their father's death and at his funeral.

Nurses pulled Clarke onto a gurney and rushed her into an examination room in a matter of moments. Looking down, Clarke noticed for the first time her pants were almost covered in blood. Fearing the worst tears continued to stream down her face. After a few minutes, the doctors had identified it as a placental rupture and rushed her into emergency surgery. As soon as she was in the OR they'd put a mask over her nose and mouth and the world faded to black. Murphy wasn't even allowed in the room and they had the baby out in under 6 minutes. From outside the door, Murphy heard a piercing cry and relief washed away a bit of his worry. After an hour finishing up with Clarke, she was wheeled into recovery. She woke up two hours after she'd been moved into the recovery room.

Opening her eyes the day's events came crashing in and she called out "My baby! Where is she?"

Murphy appeared at her side instantly with a bundle of pink blankets.

"She's right here. It's ok Clarke. You are both ok."

Crying tears of relief she reached her arms out and soon she was holding her precious little baby. The tan skin and dark hair were all Bellamy's, but she had Clarke's eye color and mouth for sure. There had never been a more perfect baby in all the ones Clarke had ever seen. Snuggling her close she sighed contentedly.

"Are you ready to name her now?" 

"I think so."

"Ok, so what is this beautiful little girl's name?" 

" It's going to be Livia after the roman emperor's wife and lee after dad, Griffin Blake."

Murphy stayed quiet for a moment obviously trying to formulate a response. " I think that's beautiful Clarke, but are you sure you want to use the name, Livia Blake?"

" It's the name Bellamy and I talked about. He may not be here but I know that's what he would want if he knew about her, and also she needs to know who her father is someday. I still believe there's a reason behind everything. I'm going to look for him again."

Huffing irritatedly Murphy placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. " We will talk about all that later. For now, let's just be grateful that you and Liv are both alive and healthy."

Clarke had to stay in the hospital for two weeks after the delivery but was finally released to go home. The recovery had been brutal, but Murphy, Wells and her friend Raven who Clarke had met at the hospital after a mixup were there for her every step of the way. They rotated being with her through the hospital and until Clarke could take care of herself again. One of them was always at her side until she had to basically do a dance to prove she was ok to be by herself.

Clarke did end up looking for Bellamy again but was stuck at the same dead ends as she was before. All of their numbers had been changed, the band's address and even Aurora's address wasn't listed. In a last-ditch effort she'd reached out to the record company to try and have anyone contact her. Nothing she tried was successful and after Livia's 1st birthday Clarke decided to give up and that Bellamy would never come for them. On the same day she decided that if he did show up after Livia turned 2 then he didn't deserve to know the gift that he'd done so well at hiding from. 

_***PRESENT*** _

Clarke slipped into the bathroom to apply her makeup and get ready before coming out and gently waking up Liv.

"Momma?"

"Time to wake up baby. Mommy's gotta go to work."

Nodding sleepily she sat up with her eyes closed. Livia mumbled as Clarke dressed her in a pair of black leggings and a pink t-shirt and Clarke couldn't help but smile at her beautiful little girl. Throwing a set of pajamas and an extra set of clothes in Livia's backpack, Clarke lifted her from the bed and carried her to the kitchen before setting her on the couch to get breakfast. Stuffing a piece of toast in her own mouth she filled a plastic baggy with bananas and cheerios and added it to the backpack. She grabbed a cup from the cabinet and set it under the Keurig, placing a new k-cup in and pressing brew. While that was brewing she put on her own shoes and Livia's. Finally, she grabbed her purse, Liv and her backpack and the coffee and then rushed out the door to her silver Mercedes GLC. 

Once they arrived at the hospital Clarke parked and took her to the nursery. Livia had fallen asleep in the car so Clarke gently laid her down on the foam beds they had for Hospital staff's children. Pressing a quick kiss to Liv's head she went to the lockers to put on her scrubs. The routine she had come up with was tiring but worked well enough for the time being. Clarke worked Sunday - Tuesday from 7 am to 9 pm and then 7 am Wednesday through 1 pm on Thursday. The hours varied though due to surgeries or different assignments. On Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday Liv would stay with Clarke at the hospital nursery. Clarke would go in and play with her during any spare time and eat lunch together. Then Clarke would check-in at bedtime to put liv to sleep. When Clarke got off she would pick her up from nursery and go home before repeating the cycle. Murphy would pick Liv up from the nursery on Wednesday afternoon after he got off work and take her to spend the night with him and his wife Emori who was 3 months pregnant. She'd spend the morning with him and then trade with Emori until Clarke got off and came to pick her up. 

Clarke hadn't wanted to work that many hours but it was required for her to put in a certain amount before she could become a resident. Luckily Thelonious Jaha was the chief of surgery and he'd given her a lot of grace in the past few years and especially when Liv was first born. Clarke was grateful for the family she had here to support her and she knew that they were the reason she'd made it this far.

Before going about her rounds Clarke made a quick stop to talk to Maya.

"Good Morning Dr. Griffin."

"Good Morning Maya, also you know it's just Clarke when it's just us."

Maya smirked and rolled her eyes playfully. She leaned in dramatically whispering sarcastically " You never know... someone is always listening."

"Alright, you weirdo. The reason I actually came over here is to ask you for a favor."

"No problem, what can I help with?"

"Well, I need you to watch and see when Bellamy Blake leaves Octavia's room."

Confusion filled Maya's features and she chuckled at the odd request. " What on Earth for?"

" Let's say that I just want to avoid him at all costs."

"Not to be nosy or anything, but why? He's a superstar yes, but you shouldn't be nervous they're just normal people too."

Clarke had to laugh at the ridiculousness of her current predicament compared to Maya's reasoning. Seeing Maya's face grow pink Clarke calmed herself enough to giggle out "Sorry Maya, I'm not laughing at you. I used to know him before he was famous.

“ You know Bellamy Blake?”

“Keyword is used to, anyways can you just let me know when it’s safe for me to go in?”

“ I don’t understand your reasoning but I will let you know when it’s safe.”

“ Thanks, Maya. Also, don’t tell anyone about our arrangement or my connection to Bellamy.”

“No problem Clarke.”

With that out of the way Clarke went about her normal rounds and did her best to avoid Octavia’s floor. Around lunch, she still hadn’t heard anything from Maya so she went to the cafeteria and picked up lunch for her and Liv.

After lunch, she had a little extra time so she painted with Livia and talked to the nursery worker a bit. Once lunch was wrapped up she spent some time in the lab going over various patients' lab work and test results. Luckily one of her patients she was able to rule out any serious conditions, with a few antibiotics and vitamins the lady would be perfectly fine. Clarke loved giving out the good news to her patients it always made her day. On the flip side when it was something negative or a family member had passed away, that kind of news was hard to get through the day with. As a doctor, she had to learn to care and be present without letting her heart get attached, a skill she had yet to master.

Finally, around 2 pm Clarke’s buzzer went off with an all-clear sign from Maya. Steeling herself she pressed the button to Octavia’s floor. The ride was only a few seconds but to Clarke, it may have well been an hour. She gripped the necklace tightly and took a deep breath as the elevator doors opened. Every step in the right direction felt more wrong than the one before. By the time she reached the door, her entire body felt like lead. Tapping the door gently Clarke heard Aurora’s voice on the other side inviting her inside.   
  


It startled her briefly because Clarke was expecting Lincoln but there was no returning to her safe zone 3 stories above now.   
  


Pushing the door open she stepped in quietly. Octavia was under heavy sedation still and Aurora was the only one in the room. Her face displayed no shock as to who had just come in and Clarke had to use all her willpower to not look confused as to why. Not wanting to linger in the room Clarke spoke up quickly.

“Good Afternoon. I’m just here to check her vital signs and the nurse's notes.”

” Of course. Dr. Wells had told Bellamy you’d be dropping by It’s so great to see you, Clarke. I hope you are doing well.”

Understanding flooded Clarke’s mind as well as irritation at Well’s behavior in an area he had no business in. Of course, he told Bellamy about her, he wanted him to be looking. Momentary panic gripped her, Wells better not have said anything about Liv. Trusting him not to go that far, she reigned in her emotions, turning her attention to the person right in front of her. Aurora’s kindness was surprising in the sense that Clarke had been exiled from all of the Blake’s lives, but then again Aurora was always been kind every time Clarke had ever seen her.

”I’m doing great actually. I’m sorry you are here under these circumstances though. ”

Sadness passed through the elder woman’s eyes before strengthening. 

  
“I definitely agree. Octavia will be fine though, she’s always been a tough little girl. I’m so proud of who she’s become.”

“Octavia is definitely strong and her vitals support it. It’s looking like we can wake her up today and see how she is after that.”

Joy flooded Aurora’s face as she gripped Octavia’s hand happily.

“That’s great news. Thank you, Clarke. You saved my baby and I’m forever grateful.”   
  


“Of course, I’m just glad she’s ok.”

“Thanks to you. Also, do you have a moment to stay? Bellamy should be back soon I know he’s been wanting to see you today.”

Clarke’s walls came flying up and she stepped back towards the door preemptively. It was all she could do not to run out tripping over herself. Muttering a quick excuse she was gone in a flash.

Why would Bellamy want to see her? There was no way he’d get into her head again. She resolved herself that no matter what happened Bellamy Blake would never affect her.

She’d almost made it to the elevator when a voice stopped her dead in her tracks.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please comment! I love reading each one! Thank you!

Bellamy’s nerves had been fried ever since he’d heard about Octavia and before they could even recover, Wells had shown up talking about Clarke. Determined to see her in a way that he could get away with Bellamy resolved to stay in Octavia’s room until Clarke showed up.

Aurora had gotten to Ark Memorial around 5 in the morning and had crawled onto a hospital provided cot next to Octavia’s bed.

Monty and Jasper had gone home to rest and left Bellamy with instructions to call as soon as Octavia woke up.

Miller had left to go to Bellamy’s house to get clothes and a small suitcase because everyone knew Bellamy would refuse to leave until Octavia was well.

Lincoln was currently on his way back to the hospital after going home to shower and change and bring clothes for himself.

It had been a long night for all of them. Each one taking Octavia’s accident completely differently.

Bellamy sat impatiently watching the minutes tick by on the large white wall clock. By 12:00 pm he felt as if time was frozen and Clarke would never come. Taking matters into his own hands he stood from the uncomfortable chair and stretched his back. He could almost feel the knots his masseuse would have to work out at his next appointment.

Pushing open the glass door he walked up to the nurses' station.

“Excuse me.”

A few nurses tripped over each other to come to Bellamy’s aid. These were younger nurses and it was obvious they were probably fans of his. Reigning in the irritation he decided to use it to his advantage.

“What can we help you with Mr. Blake?”

“ I would like to know when we can expect to see Octavia’s doctor. She was supposed to come this morning but hasn’t shown up yet.”

“I’m so sorry Mr. Blake. We will page her right away. I’m sure she’ll come as soon as she knows that you are asking for her.”

Sighing inwardly he couldn’t help but think that Clarke knowing he was there was exactly why she hadn’t come. Of course, he wasn’t about to say anything about her to the nurses. Instead, he settled on a simple thanks before heading back to his uncomfortable chair.

Aurora looked up at her son sympathetically. “Bellamy you need to sleep some. Why don’t you lay down on the cot?”

“I’m fine mom don’t worry about me.”

Aurora laughed humorlessly “ well then don’t neglect yourself like a child.”

Sighing, Bellamy got up and stretched out onto the cot. As soon as he laid down the weight of his exhaustion collapsed like a blanket over his whole body. Within a few moments, sleep filled his vision.  
  


**8 YEARS AGO***

Bellamy awoke to the sound of knocking on his apartment door. Glancing at the clock 5:00 am shone back at him. Groggily he left the warmth of his bed to find the source of the offending noise. As soon as the door was open, Clarke wrapped herself around Bellamy’s torso. Her beauty contrasted starkly with his disheveled appearance from the long night prior. What she ever saw in him, Bellamy had no idea. His brain caught up to the fact that it was still 5:00 am and while he was excited to see her, he was curious as to why she was there.   
  


“Clarke? What are you doing here so early?”

Pulling away from him, Clarke beamed brightly ”I’m sorry! I know it’s super early, but I just had to come right over! I got accepted into medical school!”

Waking up the best he could Bellamy kissed her firmly. “ I’m so proud of you Princess!”

”Thank you, babe.”

”Seriously! I knew you would get in. This is exactly what you’ve been working so hard for.”

” It makes it all worth it for sure. Thank you for being with me through everything Bell.”

Bellamy’s eyes filled with affection for the blonde in his arms. Looking down at her excited face he couldn’t imagine ever being separated. “Princess I’ll be with you forever. There’s nothing that’s gonna take you away from me. No matter how far I travel in the world, my heart will always be where you are.”

“I sure hope so. I love you more than you know Bellamy.”

” I love you the most. With all that said, I’ll take you out for a celebration today, but for now, let’s go back to bed. Because I didn’t go to sleep until 2 last night because of the show in Pennsylvania.”

”I know, sorry babe. That sounds great.”

Nodding he wrapped his arms around her and steered them back to bed. He wrapped himself perfectly around her and slinging an arm over her they fell asleep with their fingers intertwined.

**PRESENT***

Bellamy heard Octavia’s door open and he sat up in a hurry only to see another nurse coming to check on his sister.

Looking over at Aurora expectantly, she answered before he could even ask

”She hasn’t stopped by yet. Don’t worry, you didn’t miss her. It’s almost 2:00 pm. The nurse just came, I’m sure it will still be a little while. Why don’t you go get some lunch and rest for a bit?”

Deciding it was best not to argue, Bellamy conceded and made his way down to the cafeteria. He’d just finished grabbing a prepackaged salad when he passed by the hospital doors and flashes assaulted his vision. Right outside the door at least ten or fifteen paparazzi were all waiting to see a glimpse of him. In his daze, Bellamy hadn’t even noticed their presence. He quickly ducked around a corner and into the stairwell to walk back to Octavia’s room.   
  


The paparazzi were a normal part of Bellamy’s life but it’s in times like this where he really hates them. He just wanted a little bit of privacy to be with his family. They have to feed their families too but doing it off of the drama of others just irritated Bellamy to no end.   
  


Shaking off the aggravation, he opened the door to Octavia’s floor and rounding the corner he saw a flash of blonde leaving Octavia’s room.

Now she comes! The very moment he leaves! Wait! Did she wait until he left?

No Way! Not happening! He did not wait all day in that stiff chair to miss her at the last minute. Not caring about appearances he ran full speed down the hall. Once he was about ten feet away he called out “Clarke!”

She froze in place and Bellamy slowed to a jog as he got within about five feet.

Saying her name again, Clarke turned around slowly a fake smile on her face. He’d recognize it anywhere, even after all these years. It immediately took him back to when they were dating and he could read what she was thinking a mile away. She looked more gorgeous than he remembered her. Her hair was shinier and longer than he had ever seen it and even though she was just in scrubs he could tell that her figure was just as beautiful all be it fuller yet trim and stunning. If she hadn’t said his name he probably would have never stopped staring at her.

“Bellamy?”

“ Yeah, wow. I can’t believe you’re here. I mean what are the odds?”

Clarke squirmed uncomfortably taking a step backward towards the elevator behind her.

“It’s definitely crazy.”

”For sure! How long have you lived in New York?” 

”Ah about four years.”

”I’ve lived here for almost one, I love New York. Do you like it here, I mean how have you been?”

“It’s great. Uh, I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude but I really have to go.”

A sudden pit formed in his stomach. He’d only just found her. She was acting super weirdly around him but he chalked it up to just being shocked to see him after so long. “ Wait! I know you have to go. But I’d love to catch up. Can we get coffee tomorrow or something?”

“ I’m sorry, I’m actually really busy tomorrow.”

“ Ok well name the day. My schedule is pretty flexible.” 

She sighed resignedly as if it was paining her to continue the conversation a moment further. “ I can do next week on Monday for my lunch break.”

He could tell she was trying to get him to leave it alone but there was no way he was letting this go.

“Sounds great. What’s your number so we can connect?”

A look of irritation filled her expression before she huffed. “It’s the same as it’s always been.”

Bellamy felt like a bus had smashed into his chest. She was pointing out the fact that he could have reached out anytime over the last four years. He could hear the lingering pain in her voice.

“Oh ok. I’ll text you then and you’ll have my new number.”

“Great” She muttered and spun around jumping into the open elevator without sending him a second glance.

Bellamy turned back numbly walking to Octavia’s room. His mom sat up as soon as she saw him come in.

” Bellamy you just missed Clarke!”

Answering in a daze “No, I saw her in the hall.”

” That’s wonderful... isn’t it? You look upset.”

“She has the same phone number, mom. All I had to do was call her.”

Understanding colored Aurora’s features as she came over and wrapped an arm around her oldest baby.

“I understand why you didn’t for a while there, but those reasons have been long gone. You don’t need to run from it anymore

“I don’t know how to deal with her being back within arms reach. It’s been 4 years already.”

“ Bellamy you have to just go for it now or forever be wondering what if.”

“I know you’re right. It’s much easier said than done though. Especially with a history as complicated as ours. We have lunch next Monday, so all I can do is not to say something stupid in the meantime when she comes to take care of O.”

” It’s gonna work out, just wait and see.”

Just then a nurse came in, effectively cutting off the current line of conversation.   
  


“Good News! Dr. Griffin has given us permission to go ahead and administer the anti-sedatives. Octavia should be able to wake up in the next hour or so.”

Relief flooded Bellamy’s senses all at once. His sister would be ok. He could hear his mom thanking the nurse in the background but all he could do was relax and take a few deep breaths.

Lincoln made it back to the hospital about thirty minutes after the nurses had given Octavia the stimulants and the three of them huddled around the bed waiting for the brunette to open her eyes again.   
  
A muffled groan escaped Octavia’s lips and Aurora leaned in close and spoke encouragingly.

”Wake up sweetheart. We need you to open your eyes.”

Slowly but surely the brown irises became visible.   
  
Her voice came out gravelly and confused when she asked “Mom? What’s going on?”

”Octavia you were in an accident and you’re at the hospital. You’re gonna be ok now. The doctors are taking great care of you.”

”An accident?!”

Fear laced her words as she tried sitting up but yelped from the sudden movement. “How bad is it?”

This time Bellamy spoke up “You had to have surgery on your lung to repair a tear and you broke your ribs and arm. It’s gonna be tough for a few weeks but everything will heal perfectly.”

”No lasting damage, right?”

”Nope, you’re a fighter. Everything will go back to normal before you know it.”

“Ok.”

She stayed quiet for a brief moment before tears started rolling down her cheeks. The toll of the news hitting her heavily. Her arms reached for Lincoln and Bellamy and Aurora stepped back a bit to allow him to gently cradle her head in his chest.   
  


It was something Bellamy couldn’t have handled a few years ago but it was obvious how much the man loved his sister and visa versa. Now he was glad that she had Lincoln to rely on in the tough moments.   
  


Octavia only stayed awake enough to see the rest of the band briefly before she slipped back into a deep sleep. Bellamy used his celebrity status to get another cot rolled into her room. Lincoln slept on one and Bellamy on the other. Aurora went back to Bellamy’s house to sleep and get cleaned up from her traveling.   
  


Bellamy drifted off to sleep himself around 11:00 pm with his mind rattling from the day’s emotionally draining events.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please comment!! Thank you!

Bellamy’s voice made Clarke freeze in her tracks. After all these years and trying to avoid him all day her heart lurched painfully in her chest at his call.

He said her name again and she forced herself to turn around and face him. Everything in her was screaming to run away, but the look in his eyes rooted her to the spot. Bellamy seemed almost the same as the last time she saw him. Except his face told of the trials he’d faced in the time since. His curly hair, still made her stomach do flip flops and now the sight of him made her heart feel like it was cracking more every moment. She couldn’t help but see Livia staring right back at her through the father she’s never known. Plastering on the best smile she could muster she finally worked up the courage to say his name out loud.

“Bellamy?”

“Yeah, wow. I can’t believe you’re here. I mean what are the odds?”

Clarke could see the desperation and relief at seeing her in his eyes and it was almost too much to bear. Thinking of how to escape the conversation she reached behind her stepping towards the elevator button. 

“It’s definitely crazy.”

”For sure! How long have you lived in New York?” 

”Ah about four years.”

”I’ve lived here for almost one, I love New York. Do you like it here, I mean how have you been?”

This conversation couldn’t continue. She can’t say anything about her life without revealing too much. She wasn’t going to expose Livia now. It had to end now for sure.

“It’s great. Uh, I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude but I really have to go.”

He frowned deeply before throwing a hand up.

“ Wait! I know you have to go. But I’d love to catch up. Can we get coffee tomorrow or something?”

“ I’m sorry, I’m actually really busy tomorrow.” 

“ Ok well name the day. My schedule is pretty flexible.” 

The determination in his eyes was unmistakable. He wasn’t going to give up no matter what she said, so she might as well give in now and try to get out of it later.

“ I can do next week on Monday for my lunch break.”

“Sounds great. What’s your number so we can connect?”

Pain radiated her whole being he could have just called at any time, but he didn’t even try once! He could’ve been there for Liv! How was it that she tried all she could to reach him and all he had to do was call her, not even that he could have just sent her a text. Frustration leaked out of her as she snapped a bit.

“It’s the same as it’s always been.”

Bellamy looked taken aback and she was glad he thought about the depth of what she was saying.

“Oh ok. I’ll text you then and you’ll have my new number.”

“Great”   
  
It was all she could do not to run away, luckily the door opened to the elevator and she was able to get out of there in a flash.   
  


She hurried downstairs to the nursery and quickly spotted her little girl. Livia saw her mom and ran over into her open arms happily. Squeezing her tightly Clarke relished in the joy of the hug. The stress of the day melting off like snow.

She played with Livia for a little while but as soon as she was calm she went right back to work. Later that night she got word that Octavia had woken up and was doing well. Murphy picked up Liv as usual for the sleepover.

Around 1:00 am Clarke was able to sleep for a few hours in the on-call room before an emergency surgery came in and she was awakened, not that she was really sleeping well anyway. There were a million thoughts running through her head. The main question she didn’t know how to begin to answer was how she felt about seeing Bellamy again. Every emotion seemed to be fighting for control. She was so happy to see him because she missed him, sad because of all they had lost, angry because he left without a trace, and scared to lose him again.

**22 YEARS AGO***

Clarke pulled her feet back and forth urging the swing to take her higher. The cool fall air blew through her long hair and she felt like she was flying. Recess wasn’t her favorite part of the day but the swings were the only reason she tolerated it.

Over by the playground stairs, there’s a little girl with black hair talking to two other girls. Suddenly the one with black hair is pushed to the ground and Clarke jumps off the swing to spring into action. When she reaches the trio, the older girls are laughing tauntingly at the one still sitting in the dirt with tears streaming down her tan cheeks. Clarke stood as tall as she could and stared down the bullies.

“That was mean!”

”Oh look the princess is coming to the rescue of the pauper!”

”Call me whatever you want, but if you don’t leave right now I’m gonna tell the principal on you.”

Their laughing tapered off and they gave nasty looks and stormed off. It may have caused a lot of teasing for Clarke but her dad and mom owning the school worked in her favor on more than one occasion. She wasn’t afraid to use it if she had to. Spinning around on her heel she crouched down and reached for the little girl’s hand. 

”Are you ok?”

“Yeah, thank you.”

”Anytime, I’m Clarke Griffin. What’s your name? You are new here, right?” Clarke prided herself on trying to be friendly to everyone and she didn’t care what anyone else thought. It was obvious this little girl didn’t have as nice of a family that Clarke did. Her jeans had holes in them and the t-shirt she was wearing was short and faded. None of that mattered to Clarke though, she hated bullies. 

”I’m Octavia Blake. My mommy just moved here and this is my first day.”

“That’s cool. I’m sorry those girls were mean to you. How old are you?”

“I’m 6! How old are you?”

” I’m 8.”

” Wow! That’s how old my brother is! He’s around here somewhere....” Octavia scanned the playground before her eyes landed on the boy in question. “BELLAMY!”

A tall boy that looked a lot like Octavia came running up to them. His curly hair was so long that he had to push it with his hand to keep it out of his eyes.

”What is it O?”

”These girls were being mean to me, they said I was ugly.”

She didn’t get a chance to finish before his little face turned sour and he looked at Clarke threateningly.   
  


“Why would you say that?”   
  


His mean tone startled Clarke but no one would scare her. She stepped right up to him and poked him in the chest.

”I didn’t say those things! I scared the bullies off!”

Before backing down he glanced at Octavia for confirmation. With a vigorous shake of her head, a guilty look briefly passed his face before he stepped back.   
  


“Thanks for looking out for her. But it’s my job to protect her. Octavia next time you just call for me and I’ll take care of it. We don’t need the help of a princess.”

Clarke huffed at his audacity and folded her arms tightly across her chest.

”I’m not a princess!”

”Well you look like one! Besides we don’t need your help. Come on Octavia let’s go over there and play.”

He reached for Octavia’s hand but she wrenched it from his grasp, stomping her foot defiantly onto the dirt.

”No Bell! This is my friend Clarke! I’m gonna play with her!”

Bellamy snapped his gaze back to Clarke who smirked as if to say “I told you so.” Seeing that Octavia had made up her mind he stormed off to the group he was playing with earlier.   
  


As soon as he was gone Octavia turned smiling brightly.

”Sorry about him. He’s grumpy some times. Mommy said it was because he woke up on the wrong side of the bed.”

Clarke giggled at her new friend’s reasoning.

”I guess so. Anyways, do you want to come swing with me?”

”I’d love to!”

**  
PRESENT***

  
By the time 8:00 am rolled around, Clarke was absolutely exhausted. All she wanted was to take a hot shower and then slip into bed and watch a movie with her baby. Luckily for her, the hospital hadn't faced any major incidents only minor injuries and sicknesses. She was walking through the hall when a hand reached out and pulled her into the doctor's lounge. She was startled at first but when she realized it was only Maya, her nerves calmed down considerably. 

"Geeze! You scared me, Maya! What's all the secrecy about?"

"Sorry Clarke, I just know you don't want anyone hearing our conversation about Bellamy."

Just when Clarke wasn't thinking about the man in question. The same emotions came bubbling up to the service that she was trying so hard to repress. 

Trying not to sound so annoyed at the current conversation, she responded as even-toned as possible.

"What about him?"

"Well you were avoiding him, but it's going around the whole hospital that he screamed your name and chased you down the hall."

Clarke swore that the hospital could spread drama around faster than any tabloid ever could. This was precisely something she was trying to avoid. You couldn't do anything without the entire hospital talking about it within 24hrs and especially anything regarding Bellamy. For this reason, she was almost glad she hadn't been there for all the fame he'd received in the last four years.

"Ok firstly, he didn't scream my name. That's completely overdramatized. Secondly, he was just running to catch up with me. We are old friends so just tell everyone that it was no big deal."

Maya looked at her skeptically almost as if trying to read between the lines. 

"It really doesn't seem like nothing. I mean he didn't leave the room for hours, it was almost if he was waiting on you or something."

"Maya that's just hospital gossip. Just trust me there is nothing between me and Bellamy Blake anymore."

"Any more?"

Clarke could have slapped her forehead in frustration. She needed to de-escalate all these rumors and move on.

"Yes, we used to be friends. That was a very long time ago and I don't know him now. Please just convince people to drop it."

"Ok, I get the point. I'll try to help calm the nurses down about it."

"Thanks, Maya. To prove that it's not a big deal I'll even go and check on Octavia casually now."

"Alright. Sorry Clarke, it's just not every day we get a big superstar like him and then they know one of our own somehow."

"I know, it's alright. I'll talk to you later."

Clarke had no idea why she volunteered to go see him again right now, but at least she wouldn't have to worry about it again before she left at 1:00. Walking towards the ICU Clarke focused all of her attention on being as relaxed as possible. Octavia had always been there over the years. Even though Octavia was three years younger than her, the two had become fast friends that day on the playground. They had spent every day together after school until she and Bellamy had started dating in high school. Still, she tagged along with them and their friends only finding her own group when they went off to college and she was still in high school herself. It was like coming to see her long lost family in that room. Aurora and Octavia meant so much to her and she hadn't understood why they cut off communication with her after the breakup. Holding her head high and walking as calmly as she could she pushed the door open to Octavia's room. Bellamy was still asleep on the cot and Lincoln looked up at her in shock from his place by the bed. 

Octavia's eyes widened dramatically before she whisper yelled: "Bellamy, wake up."

His eyes took a moment to open but as soon as he saw Clarke standing there he sat straight up. His hair was sticking in all directions and Clarke wanted to cry at the memories that assaulted her mind. Octavia looked at Bellamy before whispering again. "Bell I think the medicine is making me see things. You should call the nurse. I can swear Clarke just came in the room."

Bellamy looked at her lovingly before whispering back. "Octavia, that is Clarke. She works here at this hospital and she's been your doctor since you've gotten here."

Octavia's gaze snapped to Clarke before her eyes widened even more. "Clarke! It's really you?"

Smiling at one of her oldest friends she put a soft hand on her foot. "It's really me O. How are you feeling?"

Shaking off the surprise she took a moment to think about her answer. "Well, pretty crappy actually. I feel like I got ran over by a bus, everything hurts. I'm actually kinda hungry though. The nurses said they weren't allowed to bring me anything until they got permission from the doctor, and from the looks of it you are who they need permission from."

"That's actually a great sign that you are hungry. I'll need to check you over though before I can give them an answer on that. First I need to check your incision site. Would you like Bellamy and Lincoln to leave? You'll be pretty exposed."

"Oh uh, Bell do you mind giving us a sec? Lincoln can stay I don't really want him to leave."

Standing up Bellamy muttered a quick "of course" before stepping outside the door. 

Clarke pulled the curtain so no could see through the glass and then checked the sutures to see how they were healing and for any signs of infection. Once everything was back in place, Clarke told Lincoln he could go tell Bellamy it was clear. 

After she had finished checking Octavia over and all her charts Clarke spoke up. "Well, I have good news for you. You can eat anytime you want and I'm gonna tell the nurses to go ahead and move you out of the ICU and to a regular floor. There you'll actually have my friend Raven as a doctor. She doesn't work on Wednesday and Thursday though, so you'll see her tomorrow. For tonight I think it's Dr. Lucas."

"Ok, that sounds great! Thank you for everything Clarke."

"It was my pleasure. I hope you feel better soon." 

"Me too. In the meantime, please come by and see me when you can even though I'm not your patient anymore. I'd love to talk a little awhile and see how you've been."

Clarke was genuinely taken aback by all of their attitudes towards her. They all acted as if they hadn't up and disappeared from her life like ghosts. Retaining her composure she answered without voicing her surprise "Sure. I'll be back around on Sunday since I have the next few days off. "

"Nice well enjoy your weekend, I'll see you sometime this week."

"See you then."

With a smile, she slipped out the door and went up to the nurses' station to inform them of the update on Octavia's condition. As she turned around to leave she came face to face with Bellamy who was obviously waiting for her to finish her conversation with the nurse. 

Groaning internally she stepped over to him and led him by the arm into the closest on-call room. It happened to only be two doors down but her hand felt like it was burning where it was wrapped around his forearm. He looked curious as to why she brought him into another room but he followed her no questions asked. 

Once they were inside and the door shut behind them she dropped his arm quickly, instantly trying to forget the feel of his skin underneath her fingertips again. Steeling herself she whispered to him, holding back the irritation in her voice. " Bellamy, I'm not trying to be rude, but no one here knows about our history and there's been a lot of speculation regarding us since yesterday. I know you are probably used to all the attention by this point, but I'm not."

"I'm sorry Clarke. I know it can be a lot. I just wanted to say thank you for taking such good care of Octavia."

"It's my job, Bellamy."

"I know that, but I wanted you to know I'm grateful. I don't know what I'd do if I lost her."

The fear in his voice instantly melted away her frustration. Knowing it was dangerous, she let herself slip back into the part of her that still cared for the man standing in front of her. Against her better judgment, she lifted her hand to rest it comfortingly on his.

"You aren't going to lose her Bell."

His eyes snapped to hers and Clarke could see that they were glossed over with tears.

"I know. I guess the stress of it all is just catching up to me."

Nodding in understanding she smiled warmly. "It's been a crazy few days. I'm sorry that this happened to her."

Before she could say anything else he had pulled her close to him and his arms wound around her back. She was completely shocked by his actions. Her arms hung limply at her side before losing the last bit of self-control she had and returning the hug. She still fit perfectly under his chin and she couldn't help the tears that slipped from her eyes. He let out a breath he'd been holding and pulled her even tighter. Her hardened heart started to melt like wax in his embrace. It was so amazing to Clarke, how much his touch could affect her even now.

Suddenly Clarke heard a voice right by the door and she came back to her senses. Realizing who she was hugging she extricated herself from his arms and almost tripped over herself to leave the room. 

What in the world had she been thinking? She felt bad for leaving him standing there, but there was no way she could go back down that road again. She obviously couldn't trust her emotions around him so she'd definitely have to cancel that lunch on Monday. Shaking herself she finished her rounds and hurried to her car. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE COMMENT! Thanks for reading!

Clarke clutched her necklace tightly as she sat in her car. Breathing in and out she reigned in her spiraling emotions. Once she had composed herself she turned on the ignition and pulled out from the hospital parking lot. About fifteen minutes later she got to Murphy's, jumped out of the car and hurried to the front door.

Emori opened it immediately and smiled at the blonde, one hand resting on her baby bump. Relieved to see a friend, Clarke felt a weight lift and she hugged her loosely. 

"Hey Emori, how are you feeling today?"

"I'm doing great actually. The morning sickness has finally lifted."

"That's great! I didn't have much with Liv, but I know it's been awful for you. I'm glad it's finally getting better."

"You were lucky for sure! Speaking of Liv she's all ready to go, and now she's just watching tv waiting for you to get here."

"Thank you! I'll grab her now. I want to run by the grocery store on the way home so I want to go ahead and get going. Thanks again for watching her. I don't know what I'd do without you and Murph!"

"We love her, and we love watching her. Never feel like it's too much."

"I know you guys do and I love it. In any case, I better get going."

"Of course!"

Stepping in the house Clarke walked to the living room before seeing her little girl perched in front of the tv. Obviously not aware of her presence Clarke took the opportunity to sneak up on her. Walking quietly she swooped Livia off the couch causing her to squeal.  
  


"MOMMY!!! You are here! I miss you much!"

Her sentence structure made Clarke smile even brighter. There wasn't anything that could beat your child's voice to a parent.

"Yes, baby! It's time to go home! Are you ready to go bye-bye?"

"Yes!"

"Great! Let's get your stuff."

Stooping down Clarke grabbed the little pink backpack and then walked back to the car, waving to Emori on the way out. She strapped in Liv and they headed to the grocery store, singing kid's songs the whole way there. At the store, Clarke put Liv in the cart and they strolled around getting everything they needed for the week. Clarke even let her get a new barbie because she acted so well behaved the entire time. By the time she checked out, the cart was full of brightly colored vegetables, organic meats, organic snacks for Liv and miscellaneous household products. The car was loaded with all the foods and then Clarke took Liv out of the cart carrying her to the car and strapping her in once again. Clarke was so grateful that Livia was so mannered already and she couldn't imagine how she would get through if she was fought on every little thing. 

At the house, Clarke unloaded the groceries while Liv played by the kitchen with her new barbie. Deciding on grilled chicken and veggies for dinner Clarke set out the chicken to thaw. 

Once everything was settled she gave Liv a bath. Liv played with her bath colors while Clarke gently brushed and detangled the knots out of her curly black hair. After the last knot was out Clarke rinsed out the conditioner and washed her body with the lavender nighttime bath soap before rinsing her again and then getting her out of the bath. Liv followed behind Clarke in her princess bath towel while Clarke grabbed her purple space ship pajamas. She helped Liv to dry fully before putting on her lotion and then the pajamas. 

As soon as bath time was all said and done Clarke went to cook while Liv started playing again. Dinner was ready about an hour later and they ate together at the white wood dining table. It took some convincing but Liv finished all her vegetables that were on the plate. Dishes were cleaned and then it was bedtime. They brushed their teeth together because Clarke was trying to teach her how to do it herself. Livia really excelled at learning and Clarke was so proud of how much she had already learned. The more she could learn now, the easier it would be for her going forward. 

With everything done, Clarke swooped up Livia and carried her to the bed. 

"Mommy?"

"Yes, baby?"

"Do I have a daddy?"

Clarke froze from where she was tucking the covers around Liv's feet.

Hoping that Liv didn't understand the question, Clarke asked: "Where did you hear that word sweetheart?"

"Sara had this big boy come get her and Lulu told me that it was a daddy. She said we all have daddies, that they are supposed to be with mommies."

Pain tore through her heart. She had dreaded the day this would come up, but it was especially difficult to process after the week she'd had. Bellamy definitely didn't deserve to know about Liv, but Liv deserved to know about Bellamy. No matter what it cost her personally she'd have to do what was best for her child.

"Yes baby, you have a daddy. He doesn't know about you yet, because he was lost for a while and mommy couldn't find him. You will meet him someday though."

Her eyes lit up hopefully and she tried to sit up. "Tomorrow?"

"Not tomorrow Liv, but one day ok?"

Laying back down disappointed but still excited nonetheless she responded: "Ok mommy."

"Now it's time to go to sleep. Mommy will sing the song but then you have to go to bed."

"Yes, momma."

"I love you."

"I love you too." Liv yawned already drifting off to sleep. Clarke started humming and then she started singing the song Bellamy had written for her their first year of college. It was their song and Clarke being hormonal sang it every night to Liv when she was a baby and now she wouldn't go to sleep unless she sings.

By the time she finished, Liv was snoring peacefully and Clarke snuck out of the room as quietly as possible. Needing to relax she grabbed a few candles and set them up around the jet tumb in the master bedroom. She added some Epson salt and lavender to the hot water before playing an instrumental off her phone and sliding down into the water. The tension rolled off her in waves as she went over the stress of the day.

Livia's question reminded her of the importance of a child's father and she hoped that once Bellamy knew the truth he would step up and be that for her. Who was she kidding? Bellamy would be devastated to find out he abandoned his daughter the same as his father. Clarke made a mental note to prepare for that emotional battle when she told him. How was she going to even tell him after all this time? One thing was for sure, she couldn't let her emotions get in the way of his relationship with Liv. She had no idea how she even let that hug happen today. This was the same man that up and left without a trace. She couldn't just throw herself at his feet. No, it definitely wouldn't happen again. She would be the perfectly cordial, friendly but not too friendly co-parent and all would work out. 

The water started to turn cold and she grudgingly washed and stepped out onto the fluffy white rug. Deciding on a simple pair of black sleep shorts and a loose-fitting tank she climbed into bed. At least tomorrow she didn't have work and she could take the day not to think about Bellamy Blake.

**13 YEARS AGO***

Clarke had just finished her test in chemistry and she was completely relieved. Once she was in the hall she picked up her phone to call Octavia.

"Hello?"

"Hey O."

"Oh hey, Clarke! What's up?"

" Just finished my chem test. Are we still hanging out tonight?"

"Oh uh, sorry Clarke. Atom finally asked me on a date and tonight is the only one he has available."

"That's great O! You'll have to tell me how it was as soon as you get home."

"I will for sure, but hey I didn't leave you completely high and dry. Bellamy said you should come with him to a show the band is playing tonight."

"I don't need Bellamy's charity O. I know he still thinks I'm a princess most of the time."

"Clarke he hasn't thought that since middle school. Besides now he only says it because he likes you."

"Bellamy doesn't like me O. In any case, I guess I'll still go."

"Yay! He does like you and you like him. You guys should just stop being weirdos already and start dating. I'll tell him not to leave school without you. You guys are gonna have so much fun."

"If you say so."

"I do! Now go find Bellamy. I will talk to you tonight."

"Talk to you tonight."

Clarke heard the other line click and she slid her phone back in her pocket. Octavia was always up to something, and you never knew quite what. Luckily Clarke had actually wanted to go see the band from Bellamy's perspective for a while now. They played more and more small gigs as time went on. Grabbing her stuff from the locker she quickly touched up her makeup and threw a black denim jacket over her white dress. She closed the locker and then headed towards the parking lot to look for Bellamy's black truck. Seeing him across the courtyard she hurried over. He was already in the truck when she reached him and so she just jumped in. His eyes ran over her appearance approvingly and he smiled.

"Glad you can come tonight Clarke. It's gonna be a great show."

"For sure! Thanks for letting me tag along."

"Anytime Princess."

Octavia was definitely right about the nickname. It had lost all its malice and now it made her insides swirl with butterflies every time he said it. Clarke didn't know when she started liking Bellamy, but one thing was for sure was that she was completely head over heels now. She hadn't wanted to pursue it because it had only been a few years where they weren't fighting like crazy anymore. She definitely didn't want to ruin what they had tenuously formed. The truck came to a stop in front of one of her favorite bistros and she couldn't help but smile brightly. Bellamy looked over at her before speaking up.

"I thought we should eat before the show. I know you like this place."

"It's perfect! Thanks, Bellamy."

Without another word he jumped out and ran over to open her door. She couldn't help but blush at his actions. More and more this day was shaping up to feel like a date instead of just two friends. They went up to the counter and ordered salads and coffee and then took the number to their table. Bellamy chose a cute little booth by the window so they could look out while they ate. Conversation flowed easily over the meal and they slipped into a comfortable rhythm of laughing some and being serious some. After the salads were finished, Bellamy took them to the trash and then the duo made their way back to the truck. They parked outside of the club and the rest of the band met them there.

Clarke was met by a chorus of hellos and it's so nice to see you. Monty and Jasper were just as hyper as usual wth Miller and Lincoln always the complete opposite. The band was ushered into the back of the club by the bouncers and Clarke relished in feeling like a superstar for the night. They set up and before Clarke knew it the curtain was being pulled back and the show was started. She got to watch it from the VIP section and Bellamy led one of the band's best songs "Sunset Beauty." It was all about this girl and the words talked about how the sunset couldn't compare to what he thought of her. Clarke loved every moment of it and she definitely wanted to do this all the time. 

The show ended and the curtains closed to full applause. Bellamy came off the stage and Clarke ran full force into his arms.

"Bellamy that was amazing!"

He spun her around and all of sudden they stopped. They locked eyes and the next thing Clarke knew she was kissing him. He responded immediately pulling her close. They fit together perfectly and the kiss made her feel like she was melting and being connected to electricity at the same time. It was the perfect moment and Clarke didn't think it was possible to be any happier. 

He set her on the ground and pulled away from her. She missed the warmth almost instantly but the look on his face was just as bright as how she felt.

"Clarke, I've liked you for a while now. I just have been waiting for the right moment to ask if you wanted to be my girlfriend."

"Yes! I like you too Bellamy!"

"Good because I don't think I ever want to stop doing this." 

Before she could even process what he said, he was kissing her again. By the time her brain recognized his statement, she couldn't help but agree wholeheartedly. 

**PRESENT***

Clarke woke up to a little body crawling on top of her.

"Momma? Are you awake?"

Smirking at the question she let out a fake snore to test Liv's reaction.

"Momma! Wake up!"

Laughing she grabbed Liv and pulled her under the covers tickling her dramatically.

"YOU WOKE UP THE TICKLE MONSTER!!!"

Liv squealed loudly and wriggled to get free of her grasp. Once she was free she got out of bed and ran to the kitchen laughing wildly. Clarke ran a hand through her hair and climbed out of bed to follow the little rascal. Finding her in the kitchen they played chase for a bit and then Clarke went to prepare breakfast for the two of them. After breakfast, Clarke started on the laundry and she stripped the sheets off the beds. Friday was always her laundry and cleaning day because if she didn't clean on Friday she'd get overwhelmed during the week.

She cleaned the bathrooms first and then moved to the kitchen. Once the sheets were washed she put them back on the bed and dusted the whole house. Then Clarke vacuumed and mopped the floors. Finally, she and Liv put all the toys away together. After the house was clean she made lunch and then they laid down for a nap together. The nap only lasted about an hour and a half and then Clarke woke Liv up and they went to the park.

When they got to the park Clarke took LIv to the toddler section and then sat down on the bench to watch her. Friday's were one of Clarke's favorite days of the week. It was always pretty much the same routine and she was able to basically spend all day with her baby. They'd been at the park for almost an hour when Clarke's phone rang. Glancing at the caller ID she answered the call.

"Hey, Raven."

"CLARKE ELIZA GRIFFIN!"

"What?"

"Why on Earth did you not tell me that BELLAMY STINKIN BLAKE was at the hospital?"

"I know. I'm sorry it was just a lot to process."

"I bet! That's why you should've called me!"

"I didn't have time to think about anything Rae."

"When I got here and they said Dr. Griffin transferred an Octavia Blake into my care I almost fell out of my chair."

Laughing at her friend Clarke imagined what that would've looked like. " That would've been hilarious if you had."

"Yeah, yeah. Enough about me. How are you? You must be freaking out like no other."

Leaning on her hand and keeping an eye on Liv at all times, she thought about what to answer. "Well sorta."

"Sorta?"

"At first I didn't even know how to take it all, but he pulled me aside the second time."

Clarke didn't even finish when a whispered yell came through the phone. "YOU TALKED TO HIM?? TWICE??"

"Yeah, the first time was super awkward and upsetting for sure. He's had my phone number all this time and he could've called at any moment. I was super mad at first but I reminded myself that he doesn't know he abandoned Liv. He just left me in his mind. The second time I pulled him into an on-call room."

"WAIT? YOU DID WHAT??"

"Geeze Rae! Not like that. It's going around the hospital that I know him because he talked to me in the hall the first time. I just didn't want any more drama."

"I get that. So what happened?"

"I was kinda annoyed at first because it was affecting my work to have a conversation with him, but then he got upset about his sister. And oh I don't know I just melted and the next thing I know, we are hugging."

"YOU HUGGED HIM?"

Pulling the phone away from her ear for the third time she rolled her eyes at Raven's dramatic personality. "Yes. I didn't mean to! It just happened!"

"So what does that mean then?"

"It means nothing when I realized what I was doing I kinda flipped and ran out of the room."

"I can understand that though. I mean you've been through so much with him. It's gotta be emotionally confusing."

"That's for sure."

"So are you gonna tell him?"

"I don't want to and I wasn't going to because of everything he did, but then Liv asked me if she had a daddy and I realized she still needs him. Even if I don't want him to hurt her, she deserves at least a chance with her father. Besides, I know Bellamy and he may have left me, but he will never leave his child."

"I mean I don't know him, but I'll trust whatever you want to do."

"Thanks, Rae. I know I can always count on you. I have to go now though and get Liv home. I'll see you on Sunday."

"Ok. See you Sunday."

Hanging up the phone she stood up from the bench and called for Liv. They got home and Clarke had to put Liv straight in the bath because she'd played in the mud. After all the grime was washed off they finished their routine and went to play some games on the floor before Clarke had to start making dinner. Clarke chose an easy dinner because she was tired from the day. She put Liv to bed and was soon fast asleep. Saturday went by, as usual, the two girls just lounged about the house watching movies and playing games. Saturdays were always relaxing and before Clarke knew it the day had flown by. She relished in the last peaceful moments before bed and prepared herself to face work again tomorrow.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please Comment! I appreciate every one of you!

Bellamy stared at the door Clarke had fled from only moments ago. She had left out of nowhere. He hadn't meant to hug her, it was just natural almost as if he couldn't resist holding her again. All he could do was hope that she wouldn't avoid him or cancel their lunch.

He decided to walk around the hospital a bit to clear his mind and before he knew it, it was time for lunch. The rest of his day was pretty mundane. He played games on his phone or chatted with Lincoln. Octavia was mostly in and out of sleep because the pain medicine they had placed her on was so strong. The nurses had moved Octavia onto another floor not long after Clarke had left and the new room was much larger than the one in ICU. Aurora had called, but because Octavia was sleeping so much Bellamy had told her to just stay and rest at his place. It took some convincing but Aurora conceded. Two cots were brought in for him and Lincoln once again and the whole day went by silently aside from the nurses coming in every so often. 

The next morning Aurora had shown up with bagels and Bellamy had an inkling that she purposely came early enough that he wouldn't tell her to stay home. It was definitely clear where he and Octavia had gotten their stubborn nature from. 

Bellamy had just bit into a bagel when a knock resounded in the room. 

Aurora spoke up first instructing whoever it was to come in. An intense but beautiful looking doctor came in and Bellamy quickly swallowed his bite of bagel.

"Good Morning, I'm Doctor Raven Reyes. I'll be Octavia's doctor for this week."

"Oh, you’re Clarke's friend!" Bellamy spoke up.

"Yeah, Dr. Griffin and I have been friends ever since we both did our internship here. It's very nice to meet you, Bellamy. And you must be Lincoln and Aurora, Octavia's mom."

"Yes! It's so nice to meet you." Aurora chimed in.

"Likewise. Anyways I'll be around throughout the day so please don't hesitate to let me know if you all need anything."

"Thank you, Doctor."

With a quick nod and a smile, the doctor was gone just as fast as she'd come in. 

"Well, she was nice."

Bellamy agreed by shaking his head and taking another bite out of the bagel. They'd all rotated talking or playing the games that Aurora had brought or silently sitting on their phones. Raven was in and out as promised once more before lunch and Bellamy got a little idea of why Clarke liked her. She was no-nonsense and yet funny and friendly at the same time. In another life, Bellamy would have loved to hang out with her, but he doubted Clarke would ever let him that close again. 

At lunch, the door opened again and this time someone he'd almost forgotten about joined the trio. 

He barely registered it before the arms of his girlfriend wound around his neck. 

"Gina?"

"Bellamy! I know you said not to come, but I wasn't going to let you handle all this by yourself. Besides, the shoot in France ended early and I was able to jump on a quick flight."

She pulled away from him only to head over to his mom and give her a hug too. Aurora hugged her back, but Bellamy knew that his mom wasn't comfortable with the brunette. She didn't outright say that she didn't like Gina, and Bellamy did think she didn't mind her, but it was obvious to him that his mom didn't think she was right for him. Gina had been a model that was in one of his music videos a couple of months back and they'd flirted around enough and so he asked her out. He felt that she was probably more invested than he was, but he was trying to get over Clarke and it was just simple with Gina. 

Gina settled in and started rambling about her trip and it was enough that Bellamy could tune out and just let his mind drift. 

**11 YEARS AGO***

Bellamy had just finished a show and he was so excited to go see his girlfriend. Clarke wasn't able to make it that night because she had finals when they had to leave for the concert hall. She had promised to wait up for him and he was counting down the moments to see her. They'd been dating for two years already and Bellamy couldn't imagine life without her. She'd started pre-med and the hours had been grueling for the both of them because it always seemed like their schedules conflicted now. He parked his truck in front of her apartment and tried his best not to run up the stairs. Opening the door with his key he scanned the room quickly. 

Just as he finished looking around she popped her head out of the bedroom. In a flash, she was kissing him and he relished in the feeling of her long hair draped over his arms around her back. She'd obviously just gotten out of the shower because her hair was still damp and she smelled like her floral body wash. 

"I missed you Bell! How was the show?"

"It was good. It would've been better if you could have come."

Smiling sadly she pulled back from their hug. "I know babe, but I'll be at the one this weekend for sure."

"I can't wait."

"Me either now come on. Let's get ready for bed because it's been a long day."

"Sounds perfect."

Clarke led the way back to the room and Bellamy jumped in the shower to wash off the day. After towel drying, he slid on a pair of grey pajama shorts and decided to forego the shirt. Brushing his teeth with the toothbrush he always left here, he finished up his routine. Clarke was already waiting for him under the covers. She was wearing a silk pink nightshirt and he didn't think it was possible for anyone to be more beautiful. Jumping on the bed he grabbed her dramatically kissing and tickling her until she squealed. After they settled down he slipped under the covers and she turned off the lamp. He ran his hand down her arm before kissing her soundly and whispering.

"I love you princess."

She kissed him again before answering "I love you too Bell."

He loved hearing her call him Bell. It was a name reserved only for her and Octavia. When Octavia said it, it always reminded him that she was his responsibility and that it mattered whatever he did. She would always be his baby sister. But when Clarke said it, it made him think of the rest of his life. It made him feel seen completely and yet loved no matter what. He didn't think anyone else would ever be allowed to use that name.

Within a few moments, her breathing deepened and he wrapped his arms around her guiding her as close as possible. Love radiated through him as he drifted off to sleep. He was sure that this is what he wanted forever.

**PRESENT***

Reality came crashing back in like a tidal wave when Gina asked him. "Isn't that just amazing?"

"Oh, uh yeah sure."

Apparently, that satisfied her because she continued with her never-ending story.

Around dinner time Lincoln came up to him and asked if they could take a walk. Bellamy was ecstatic for the break and jumped at the opportunity. They were walking for a few minutes when Bellamy noticed Lincoln was wringing his hands a bit.

"What's up Linc?"

"Bellamy you know I love your sister. She means more to me than this whole world and this week has shown me I can't imagine my life without her."

It took him just a second before he figured out what the bald man was asking. He knew this was coming soon and it was already something he'd processed to a great extent. Taken aback momentarily he responded. " I know you do."

"Great, so I want you to know that I would take the best care of her that's possible. I just wanted to ask for your blessing because of our relationship with the band and everything. I'd like to ask Octavia to marry me."

It'd taken him many years to get to the place he was now, but at this moment he couldn't be happier at Lincoln's decision. "I'd love to support you one hundred percent. Thank you for letting me know ahead of time. When are you going to ask?"

"Thanks, Bellamy. It really means a lot to me that you trust me with your sister. Uh, I guess I'm gonna do it tomorrow. I brought my grandmother's ring that Octavia loves so much and I don't really want to waste any more time."

"Sounds like a plan, just give me a signal and I'll make sure everyone leaves the room."

"Thanks again, Bellamy."

"Of course, and welcome to the family."

The rest of Friday went by mindlessly. Gina pretty much only left him alone to go to his place and sleep and show back up in the morning. Much to the dismay of his mom who tried all she could to not go back with the model. He felt a little bad, but maybe it would help his mom to like her a bit more. 

On Saturday around lunch, Lincoln had given Bellamy the signal and he'd escorted Aurora and Gina down to the cafeteria to give them some privacy. Unfortunately, the paparazzi were still there, so they had to steer clear of the glass. After lunch, they'd gotten to the room and Octavia had shown off her ring proudly. His mom and Gina got caught up talking to her about wedding details within just a few minutes and Bellamy just sat back and watched their excitement. He was glad his sister had found someone so genuine and that she loved. It wasn’t a luxury that he’d seen many people have. Saturday night was filled with non-stop wedding talk and it was a bit annoying but at least Octavia had her mind off all of the pain she was in.

Around nine Gina and Aurora had left to go to his place and Bellamy was happy for the reprieve in all the talking. 

By midnight Bellamy had crashed, sleep hitting him out of nowhere. His dreams were filled with his memories with Clarke and while they were peaceful sometimes he felt guilty about them because he was with Gina. Clarke returning to his life was a reminder to him though that he could never feel as strongly about Gina as he did Clarke. He didn’t want to spend his whole life comparing the two. It wasn’t fair to him and it definitely wasn’t fair to Gina. By the end of the night, he’d made his decision to go ahead and make the break with Gina. It was just something he didn’t want to linger.   
  


Sunday morning rolled around and as soon as Gina got there Bellamy pulled her onto the balcony to talk.   
  


“Good morning to you too.”

”Sorry I’m not trying to be abrupt or rude. There’s just something I need to get off my chest.”

Nodding lightly she made strong eye contact urging him to continue. 

“I’ve enjoyed getting to know you over the past two months and I think you are a sweet and caring person.”

She recognized the path he was taking and tears started to form in her eyes.

”Bellamy you are just tired and this is stressful for you.”

Sighing sadly, he really hated hurting her. ”Gina, I am tired but I don’t want to drag you along when I know in my heart that it’s not right.”

”I know you think this is right and I’ll go back to my apartment until this all blows over. After it’s settled then I want to revisit and see how you feel.”

”I don’t want you to have your hopes up.”

”You don’t control my hopes Bellamy and besides if this is how you feel then it will be the same then. Until that point, I’m not continuing the conversation.”

Seeing that her mind was made up he just decided to let it go. 

”Ok.”

Satisfied with his answer she stood up tall. “Well then, I’ll call you in a few days and see how you are doing.”

”Alright.”

She leaned in and gave him a hug before going inside and grabbing her stuff and leaving. Bellamy let out the breath he’d been holding. It could have gone better but at least it was over for now. 

When he got back in Octavia looked at him expectantly.

”Yes O?”

”Not that I disagree with your decision, but why did you just break up with Gina?” Octavia crossed her arms and gave her brother a don’t mess with me look.

”I just realized she’s not right for me.”

“This is because of Clarke.”Her tone held an air of finality to it. It was clear she was not moving from this until they talked it out.

”This is not because of Clarke.”

”Don’t lie to yourself, Bellamy. You are just as in love with Clarke Griffin as the day you had to leave her.”

He hated to admit it, but his sister knew him well. There was a good bit he could hide from her but most of it she saw right through. 

“So what if I am?”

”Well you are. That’s the first thing you need to do is admit it.”

Bellamy couldn’t help the irritation rise up in his tone. She acted as if it was so easy for him.

”Oh? Is that so? Then what is the second thing?”

Matching his attitude tick for tick Octavia didn’t miss a beat. Lincoln knew to stay out of it when their discussions got like this and Aurora watched on the see if she would need to intervene.

”The second thing is man up and tell her the truth!”

”The truth? What do you want me to say huh O? That her mom made me cut all ties with her?”

Saying it out loud again made his irritation rise all the further. He’d pushed down the arrangement Abby had backed him into all those years ago and he wasn’t about to open it now.

”Yes! It’s the truth!”

”That would crush her entire relationship with Abby! Not to mention the fact that it probably doesn’t matter now anyway!”

”You don’t know that!”

At this point, the siblings were yelling at each other and Aurora stepped in between them talking firmly but at a normal volume.

”Be quiet you two! We are surrounded by nosy people and you are about to tell them all our dirty laundry!”

Realizing their error they both quieted down.

”Now listen, Octavia, it is up to Bellamy what he wants to do moving forward with Clarke. Bellamy, you admitted that you are in love with her still. So you should tell her the truth, but if you want to be miserable then you can continue ignoring it. I for one am done playing games with this whole situation. I’m fine now and Abby has nothing to hold over you. If you want to be with Clarke you should try. Don’t spend your whole life missing someone that’s within your grasp now. Besides all that you guys are siblings, I know emotions are on high right now and for good reason. You two have to calm down and be loving towards each other. You need to stick close now more than anything.”

Feeling thoroughly lectured Bellamy realized his mom was right. He needed to be there for Octavia during her recovery and he can’t let his emotions bubble over into his responsibilities.

”I’m sorry O, Mom is right. I don’t want to fight with you. I just let my emotions get out of control.”

Octavia softened at his apology as usual and tears ran down her face.

”I just want you to be happy. I’m not trying to fight.”

Feeling even worse now Bellamy stepped over to hug his little sister gently. She was obviously in a lot of pain and just lashing out from all the craziness.

She calmed down after a few moments and everyone went back to their own spots. It was silent for the next few hours and Bellamy decided to go grab lunch for Lincoln, Aurora and himself. The walk to the cafeteria was a nice break for sure. It was insane to him how stressful being at this hospital could be. As he was walking back he wondered if Clarke was gonna come by so he stopped at the nurses' station.

A bubbly redhead spotted him coming and made it a point to get to him first.

”Hi Mr. Blake. How can I help you?”

”I was just wondering if Dr. Griffin would be stopping by Octavia’s room anytime soon. She’d told Octavia she would stop by on Sunday.”

”It’s lunchtime so Dr. Griffin will be in the nursery eating as she always does and then she comes back on the floor.”

Confusion etched across Bellamy’s brow. Nursery? Why would she be there?

”Uh I’m sorry, I meant Dr. Clarke Griffin.”

The nurse smiled brightly and replied “Of course sir, that’s the same one I was talking about. Dr. Clarke Griffin always eats with her daughter during lunch.”

Bellamy felt like the world started to spin. Clarke had a daughter! He had missed his chance with his princess. She’d probably gotten married not long after the breakup and now she has a daughter. He didn’t hear another word that the nurse said as he turned and walked back into Octavia’s room. The lights felt like they were flashing in his eyes and his head felt heavy. He barely made it to the cot before he collapsed onto it. 

“Bellamy?”

”Bellamy?”

It wasn’t until he heard his name a third time that the lights stopped flashing and he came back to himself. Mustering his strength he said

”Daughter.”

All three other people in the room looked at him as if he had three heads. 

Aurora spoke up next. “Sweetheart, what are you talking about?”

Shaking himself he tried saying it clearer.

”Clarke has a... she has a...”

Octavia’s concerned voice cut through this time “ Has a what Bell?”

”Clarke has a daughter.”

With the statement finally out there. The room grew silent.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and enjoy!

Clarke's Sunday had gone by pretty uneventfully. She’d gotten her and Liv ready before heading to the hospital. Since the morning had started she’d only had one emergency case. Around lunch, she’d gone to see Liv as usual. After they were done with their veggies Clarke was able to stay for a bit longer and paint with her baby. She got back to work and a nurse came up to her immediately.   
  


“Dr. Griffin?”

”Yes?"

"The Blake's were asking when you'd stop by."

"Oh uh, well I have a lot of patients to tend to today so I'll come by when I can."

The nurse looked at her like she was completely stupid. "Bellamy Blake is asking if you are gonna stop by."

Irritated Clarke resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "Yes, I know. I'm busy today. I'll go by when I can. Now if you'll excuse me I really have to go."

Without letting the nurse say anything else Clarke turned on her heel and left.

She could swear it was like all these people had screws loose. Bellamy Blake was just a person and there was no reason to go so crazy every time he said something. The nurse's comment made her want to avoid the drama for as long as she could. Around 2:00 pm Raven came to see her and they chatted a bit before parting their separate ways. She finished her shift and grabbed Liv from the nursery. When they got home Clarke decided on just warming up some leftovers and settling down on the couch to watch the newest cinderella. They were about halfway into the movie when Liv’s little voice cut through the movie’s dialogue.

"Momma are you ok?"

"Of course baby. Why are you asking?"

"You seem sad."

Clarke felt guilty because she had unknowingly worried her daughter by her own crazy emotions. She really needed to do better in shielding Liv from all the drama around her. 

"Mommy is completely fine sweetheart. How about we actually have some ice cream and that will make everything better?"

Liv's face lit up with excitement, traces of worry erased. 

"Chocolate please!" 

"Of course!"

After a few moments, Clarke returned with two small bowls of ice cream that they finished by the time the movie had ended. Swooping Liv up, Clarke carried her off to bed and tucked her in. As she climbed into her own bed her phone chimed on the nightstand. Flipping it over it was from an unknown number so she unlocked it to see who it was.

'Hey Clarke, it's Bellamy. I hope you had a great day. I just wanted to text you to confirm our lunch tomorrow.’

She looked at the phone disapprovingly. Just that easy and now she could contact him anytime she wanted. For some reason, she couldn't help but start laughing uncontrollably. Everything she went through to get this stupid number and it was only a text away. It really wasn't funny but the laughter seemed to wash off a lot of the sting surrounding the whole situation.

Sending him a quick text, she resisted the desire to call him just to hear his voice. 

"Hey, Bellamy. I normally have lunch anywhere from noon to two. I’ll text you when I’m free and then we can meet by Octavia’s room. I don’t want the paparazzi to see us so we can eat in one of the doctor’s lounges instead.”

Hitting send she stuck it on the nightstand and didn’t look at it again until morning.

**14 YEARS AGO***

Clarke sat alone outside the school dance, her light pink dress was dirty around the hem where she’d run through the wet grass.   
  
She’d run away from the school in tears and then plopped onto the ground by Bellamy’s truck.

A few minutes passed until the sound of footsteps approaching cause her to look up. Bellamy stood for a moment, taking in her disheveled appearance before sitting on the ground next to her and allowing Clarke to cry into his chest.

Later when her tears had mostly subsided they just sat there together in the quiet.

”Do you want to tell me what happened princess?”

She didn’t lift her head from her chest as she muttered. ”I found Finn kissing another girl in the hall.”

His whole body tensed under her embrace. Before he could move she held him tighter.

”No Bellamy, please don’t do anything. He’s not even worth it.”

He stayed tensed for another moment before settling back down.

”Only because you said so Clarke, but if I’m not gonna be allowed to go punch him then we should get out of here.”

”Where should we go? I look ridiculous!”

”You look beautiful Clarke, but I was just thinking to go back and relax at the house, order Chinese and maybe watch a funny movie.”

”That sounds perfect.”

”It’s settled then.”

He extricated her from his arms and stood up. He pulled her to stand and then helped her into the truck. They ran by a little hole in the wall Chinese restaurant and continued on their journey towards the house.

When they got to Bellamy’s house he settled on the couch and started to set up the food on the coffee table, while Clarke went upstairs to change.

”I hope you don’t mind, but the clothes I normally leave here are all dirty so I had to borrow one of your shirts.”

Bellamy looked up from where he was scrolling on Disney plus, to take in her appearance. Her previously curled hair lay in loose waves dangling from her shoulders and his grey football t-shirt engulfed her. He only noticed the navy blue spandex shorts peeking out just below the rim when she walked over to him. Her voice brought him out of his stare and she sat down next to him on the couch sitting just close enough that their thighs grazed.

”I got you some orange chicken. I know it’s your favorite.”

Clarke beamed at him and hurriedly opened the white cardboard container in front of her.

”Thanks, Bellamy! How’d you know it was my favorite?”

”Well you and Octavia always order the same two things and her favorite is the Mongolian beef so that leaves you with the orange chicken.”

She looked at him curiously with a puzzled expression.

”I can’t believe you notice all that.”

”Princess I pay attention to everything.”

”I guess so.”

With that said, she clicked on a movie and pulled the box of orange chicken into her lap. Later when the food had been finished she pulled a blanket over them and cuddled into his side. His arm draped comfortably around her and pulled her closer. Sometimes towards the end of the movie Clarke found her eyes growing heavy and soon she had fallen asleep. The next morning she woke up on Bellamy’s chest who had fallen sometime after her. After that night they had a certain closeness that hadn’t left until they broke up years later.   
  


**PRESENT***

When she woke up in the morning she had a text from Bellamy saying “Sounds like a plan, I’ll talk to you then.”

Rolling out of bed she made her way to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. Her hair looked a little flat and normally she would just put it up or in a braid but since she was eating with Bellamy today she wanted to look nice. She told herself that it wasn’t because or him but that wasn’t even close to the truth. Curling her hair a bit she refreshed the roots and sprayed some shine over it. Washing her face and brushing her teeth she pulled her makeup out of the drawer and applied it. She spent a little longer on her eyes than usual but by the time she was done her blue eyes popped. Satisfied with the outcome she threw on some clothes and went to get Liv ready. 

They were out the door quickly and on their way. Clarke kissed Livia at the nursery door and stooped down to talk before she went to change.

”Alright Liv, momma has a meeting today so you’re gonna have to eat lunch here with your friends.”

”Can I come too, momma?”

”Not today sweet pea. I’ll be back later though.”

”Alright, I guess.”

Liv bowed her head sadly but nodded.

”I know it’s kinda sad but momma will still be here for all the breaks and we can even play with some new play dough tonight. Ok?”

She perked up a little and threw her arms around Clarke’s neck. 

“Ok. I love you.”

”I love you so much.”

With Liv settled, Clarke made her way to the lockers to change into her scrubs.

She focused intently on her work trying to ignore her impending lunch with Bellamy. What would they even talk about? She definitely wasn’t ready to tell him about Liv and that meant she really couldn’t say anything about the last four years. Before that he knew everything about her so what would they talk about? The more she tried to avoid stressing about it the more weighed down she felt.

Drinking an iced coffee with four shots she forced herself to think about anything but Bellamy Blake. Around 11:00 am she had an opportunity for an early break so deciding to get the lunch over with she sent a text.

”Hey Bellamy, I’m available early so are you free now?”

Her phone chimed with a text from Bellamy before she could even put it back in her pocket. 

“That actually works out great. I forgot breakfast so I’m starving. I’ll grab something from the cafeteria for both of us and meet you in front of Octavia’s room.”

Part of her heart grew instantly excited to see him but mostly she was filled with nerves. It felt like an SAT test and a championship game put together. She just needed to act casual and keep the conversation as light as possible. Why she even agreed to it, she had no idea.

Calming her nerves she finished the last bit of paperwork she had started and then went to face Bellamy. 

By the time she got to Octavia’s door, he was already standing there with a bag of food in his hand. A warm smile spread across his face at her appearance and Clarke couldn’t help but feel satisfied with herself. She was definitely glad she spent the extra time getting ready this morning.  
  


”Hey Clarke.”

“Hey Bellamy, uh thanks for grabbing lunch. There’s a room we can in eat right over here.”

He shifted awkwardly before putting out his arm as if to say “After you.”

Taking the cue, Clarke led the way to the same lounge she’d dragged him into last week. She gently closed the door behind them as he started setting the food on the table.

”I wasn’t sure what to get so I got a sandwich and a salad. I figured you can pick which one you want.”

”I don’t really care, either way, you pick.”

”I’ll eat the sandwich?”

“Perfect.”

The room was filled with awkward tension as the two danced around each other like middle school teenagers. Clarke scooted the chair out and sat down across from the curly-haired rockstar. She picked at her salad and he nibbled on his sandwich, both avoiding eye contact. Finally, Clarke spoke up breaking the silence

”So, how’s Octavia?”

”She’s doing ok, stubborn as always. She’s constantly trying to push herself further than she needs to.”

”She really should take it easy, her body underwent a lot of trauma.”

”That’s what I’ve been telling her, but maybe she’d listen to you instead.”

”I doubt it, Octavia only really listens to herself and maybe Lincoln part of the time.”

The tension lifted a bit as Bellamy smiled proudly. 

”Oh yeah that reminds me, I’m sure she’ll tell you but Lincoln just proposed a couple of days ago.”

”That’s great! They are perfect for each other. I’m glad you’re finally okay with it.”

Bellamy tilted his head a bit remembering the process.   
  


“I mean it took longer than it should have, but Lincoln takes care of her more than I could have hoped for and she’s loved him for a while now.”

Clarke was dedicated to keeping the conversation flowing and steering it in the direction that she was comfortable with. 

”That’s for sure. How has your mom been?”

”Well she was diagnosed with cancer a few days before we broke up. She’s been in remission for over a year now and she’s really just now getting back to her old self. I’m really amazed at how strong she always is no matter what is thrown at her. It’s always been that way but it’s still incredible to see.”

Clarke felt a twinge in her heart at the mention of the breakup. Simultaneously her mind became riddled with questions. Was this part of the reason he left so suddenly? She kept her face neutral and asked

”That’s horrible Bellamy. I’m so glad she’s doing better. I can’t imagine what it must’ve been like to see her endure all of that. Aurora has always meant a lot to me. I just don’t understand, why you didn’t tell me.”

Bellamy looked a little startled as if he hadn’t realized he’d spilled a secret. He picked up his sandwich and took a bite obviously trying to make the conversation lighter.   
  


“Uh well, I didn’t really have the chance. Anyways she’s good now. How’s Murphy?”

Clarke didn’t miss the abrupt change of direction and she made a mental note to dig further into what had begun to unravel. It may not make a difference but she deserved to know the whole story.   
  


“Murphy is great actually, he’s married now to another tech nerd he met, Emori. She really keeps him in line and believe it or not they are actually expecting their first baby.”

Bellamy’s eyes widened as he paused mid-bite of his sandwich.

”No way!”

”It’s pretty surreal for sure.”

”You could say that again. So much has happened since we last saw each other, huh?”

Clarke heard an edge to his voice and she wanted to be quick to steer him away from anything to do with her or what she’d been doing.

”How’s Jasper and Monty?”

Unfortunately, it was obvious Bellamy caught her hasty diversion and his interest had piqued.

”They’re good, I mean the same really. Although Monty is dating this music producer’s admin, Harper.”

Clarke chuckled a bit ”Well at least there’s one thing I would have guessed. I’m glad Monty found someone, now we will just have to find a girl for Jasper.” 

Now it was Bellamy’s turn to laugh

”If that’s even possible.”

A light moment passed where old times were forgotten and it was just two friends again. Of course, the moment wouldn’t last though. 

“So how have you been Clarke? What’s new since the last time we really talked?”

Clarke flipped through her brain like a rolodex trying to formulate a quick response devoid of anything about Liv.

”I’m really good. After graduation, I moved here and started working with Thelonious at ARK. It’s a great hospital to work at and all of the staff are supportive. I finished my internship last year and now I’m a resident. In about three years I’ll actually be an attending and be over a lot more. Anyways though, enough about me how about you? How’s the band?”

Bellamy raised an eyebrow at her and she felt a pit form in her stomach. She knew that look...

He suspected she was hiding something. He always used it while they were together when he wanted to get her to talk about a secret or whatever was really on her mind.   
  


Alarm bells went off like crazy as she felt suddenly very exposed. When he spoke up she listened closely to every word.

”I’m great, you already know about everyone in my life. We got signed around the same time as my mom was diagnosed and since then it’s been a roller coaster. The band has gotten more popular than I ever thought was possible and while I love it, sometimes I feel it interferes too much with everyday life.”

Clarke let go of the breath she was holding at the averted bullet.

”I’ve seen you guys on tv enough to know it must be crazy. I’m glad you’ve been able to achieve your dreams though.”

”Not all of them, but yeah.”

Clarke went to say something when he spoke up again. This time with determination in his eyes.

”You know I heard something from a nurse the other day. I’m surprised you haven’t said anything, but in any case, she said you have a daughter?”

The floor fell out from underneath her. Of course, he’d find out! These stinking hospital walls never keep anything! Glancing at her salad it was pretty much finished so she grabbed the lid and closed it. Not looking up as she answered.

”Oh, of course, I just didn’t have the opportunity yet. I have a little girl, she’s really great. Uh, actually that reminds me I need to go make sure she’s eating her lunch. I normally always eat with her but this was the only time to catch up with you.”

Clarke pulled together all her things as she was talking and stood as quickly as she could without looking like she was running.   
  


“Thanks again for lunch Bellamy. I’ll uh... I’ll see you around. Tell Octavia I said congratulations.”

She didn’t even give him a chance to respond as she slipped out the door and sped walked to the lockers. Sitting down on the bench she took a deep breath.

Well, that was not the way that lunch was supposed to go.

If Bellamy already knew she had a daughter she would have to tell him the whole truth sooner than later. She inwardly screamed. Why did it have to be so complicated?   
  


Throwing herself into her work she focused on anything and everything that wasn’t Bellamy Blake. Nighttime couldn’t have come fast enough and as soon as she was off she skipped the lockers and went straight to Liv. She picked her baby up and left and quickly as possible. At least no one in the hospital besides Wells and Raven knew who Liv’s father was and that at least was something she could control when he found out.   
  


She threw together a quick dinner and played with Liv until bedtime. She refused to let her stress and emotions affect the three-year-old. It was times like this where she really wished she had another person to rely on to help. Putting Liv to bed she put on her own pajamas and laid down. She turned on some classical music and fell into a restless sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! Please Comment! This chapter switches things up a bit with Octavia's POV!

******OCTAVIA’S POV******

Octavia was already sick of sitting in this uncomfortable hospital bed. When Lincoln had proposed on Saturday it had made the whole day go by in a blur, just being excited to be engaged. Sunday had started off on the wrong foot with her and Bellamy's argument. The man was so stubborn and he refused to think of himself over anyone else. He'd spent his childhood trying to fill in for their dad who'd left before she'd even been born.

In high school, he'd watched over her and worked to help their mom pay bills. He continued to be there for them no matter what happened in his own life and he only pursued his own dreams when it became profitable. When his mom had gotten cancer he'd paid for all of her treatment, and took care of her every moment that he wasn't doing a show with the band. That season was over though. She wasn’t a little girl anymore, she was engaged, and she definitely didn't need him to watch over her. Their mom was healthy again, and Aurora was more than set financially thanks to Bellamy. Now she just needed to figure out how to get Bellamy to realize it was finally time for him to take care of himself and go after what he wanted.

The room was silent after the argument and she dozed off for a little while. She woke up to the sound of the door closing and she scanned the room to see who had left. Seeing Lincoln sitting directly next to her and her mom across the room she asked Aurora "Where'd Bellamy go?"

Aurora looked up from her book to answer Octavia's question.

"He just went to grab lunch for him and Lincoln from the cafeteria. He'll be right back and then I'm gonna run and grab something for myself from Panera. Are you hungry? I can go grab a nurse to bring you some food."

Thinking about it for a moment she realized she was pretty hungry, but the thought of hospital food was repulsive. "I am pretty hungry, but do you think you can bring me something from Panera instead?"

"Of course, just text me what you want and I'll go grab it as soon as your brother gets back."

"Sounds good."

Lincoln leaned closer to her and laid a hand over top her own.

"How are you feeling babe?"

"I feel alright, everything is sore but the medicine keeps most of the pain at bay. Mostly I'm just tired of sitting here. "

"I'm sure you are, but the rest is the best thing for you."

"Yeah, yeah I know."

Just then the door flung open before shutting quickly behind a heavily breathing Bellamy. He stumbled a bit before falling onto the cot. The weight of the world resting on his shoulders. 

Lincoln called out to him first "Bellamy?"

When that didn't cut through the fog Octavia called sharply "Bellamy?"

He still didn't respond so she raised her voice even more "Bellamy!"

Finally, it seemed to catch his attention. He calmed a bit before taking a deep breath and muttering "Daughter."

Completely confused, she looked at Lincoln and her mom to see if they knew what he was talking about. They were just as lost as her, so her mom spoke up "Sweetheart, what are you talking about?"

Bellamy struggled to formulate words stumbling a bit as he spoke. "Clarke has a... She has a..."

Worry filled her being, what in the world was so wrong with Clarke that had her brother in this state?

"Has a what Bell?"

He looked up this time and said it clearly. 

"Clarke has a daughter."

At that moment, Clarke having a kid was the last thing she was expecting him to say. What did it even mean? How old was the little girl? Had she gotten married? Octavia didn't remember seeing a ring, but maybe she took it off during work. Who had she married then? Or was she a single mom? Where was the father then? 

A chilling thought filled her mind all at once. Was Bellamy the father? No, Octavia. Don’t even think about it! She would've told him. That wasn't Clarke's character. Did she know that for certain though? Yes of course. Bellamy can’t be the father. So was she married or what had happened?

When it was clear Aurora and Lincoln had no response, she decided to speak up.

"How do you know that?"

He scrubbed an exhausted hand across his face and tried shaking the shock off.

"I was wondering if she would stop by today, so I asked a nurse at the nurses' station, and she said that Dr. Griffin always has lunch in the nursery. So, of course, I figured she couldn't have meant Clarke so I clarified the question. Sure enough, she said that Dr. Clarke Griffin always has lunch in the nursery with her daughter."

Aurora interjected before Octavia could reply. 

"Bellamy, that could be just a rumor or miscommunication. What if she takes care of someone else's child and the nurse assumes it her's?"

Bellamy had obviously not thought of this possibility and he looked up thoughtfully at his mother's point. 

"Or what if the nurse is just making something up completely because she sees how much interest you show in Clarke?"

Aurora's questions definitely proved a strong point, now the problem was how can they find out the real story? Octavia remembered that Bellamy was supposed to have lunch with the girl in question the following day and came up with an idea. 

"Mom is right Bell, you can't just believe everything you hear people say. Besides, aren't you having lunch with Clarke tomorrow?"

"I'm supposed to."

"Perfect, just see if she talk about her family or if she has a kid. That's not something you normally leave out when you are catching up with someone."

Agreeing with his mom and sister the color returned to his face. "You're both right. I'll see what she says tomorrow and if she doesn't outright mention it. I'll just ask her about what the nurse said."

Satisfied with their plan the room fell back into a comfortable silence. A few minutes later Aurora left to go get Panera and Bellamy, Lincoln and Octavia watched the Avengers on his laptop. It was obvious the earlier news still lingered on everyone's minds as the topic of Clarke, children or anything to do with her, was avoided. Aurora got back and they finished the movie while everyone ate. The rest of the day went by slowly and Octavia could only imagine how slow it must have been for her brother. Around four in the afternoon the nurses came in and helped Octavia to shower which almost made her feel like a new woman. After she was resituated in the bed with clean sheets and clean clothes, Aurora brushed her hair and braided it to keep it under control. Aurora left for the day around dinner time and Octavia tried unsuccessfully to get Bellamy to go home with her. He refused to leave but at least he did shower and leave her and Lincoln alone for a little bit. After Bellamy was done they ordered Chic-Fil-A from Uber eats and then ate it amidst a game of Poker. 

Not long after dinner, Lincoln took his turn in the shower and finally it seemed like everyone had washed off the days' events. Conversation flowed easily and they put on a movie before all going to sleep for the night. 

The next morning came and the anticipation for Bellamy's lunch didn't just consume Bellamy. Octavia couldn't help being anxious not only for her brother but curious about if the rumor was true about Clarke. The few hours from the time Octavia had woken up until Bellamy received the text from Clarke felt like days. Bellamy had checked his phone almost obsessively all morning waiting on any word. She figured his main concern was her canceling the lunch and his secondary concern was how to handle the upcoming conversation if she went through with it. When the text did finally come he said a hasty goodbye to her and Lincoln and left. 

When it was just her and Lincoln she couldn't help but think of day Bellamy had broken up with Clarke. 

******4 YEARS AGO********

Octavia had come in from college over to her mom's a day prior, after her mom had told her about the diagnosis. She'd tried her best to keep the somber atmosphere at bay. She'd just made the two of them grilled chicken Caesar salads when the front door was all but thrown open. Bellamy's strained voice rang through the house.

"Mom?"

"In the kitchen!"

A brief second passed before Bellamy rounded the corner. His face was red and blotchy, tears still running down his face. His eyes were dark and he looked as if he'd just been hit by a truck.

He made quick strides to their mom before she stood up and he wrapped himself around her sobbing into her shoulder. 

His mom's soothing voice whispered to try and calm him down, running a comforting hand up and down his back. "Shh, Shh it's gonna be ok Bellamy. It's all be ok, you'll see."

He pulled back to look at his mom and realizing her condition he sat her back in the chair before sitting in the one directly beside her. "No mom, you don't get it. Clarke is gone. It's over."

Aurora and Octavia were both completely shocked at his statement and Octavia filled with anger. How dare she? After everything, he was dealing with? She stood up and he looked at her sharply.

"Where are you going?"

Frustration leaked onto every word "I'm going to go see what the heck her problem is!"

"NO! I broke up with her."

The irritation was muddled by extreme confusion. Why on Earth had he broken up with her all of a sudden? Surely the blonde had still done something horrid. 

"Why? What did she do?"

"Nothing O! I can't talk about it right now!"

None of it made any sense. There had to be a reason. 

"What do you mean you can't talk about it?"

He gave up trying to answer as he muttered " I just can't" and then he left abruptly to his old bedroom.

She stood up to follow him but Aurora grabbed her arm.

"Octavia we have to trust your brother, I'm sure he will tell us when he can. It's obvious right now he just needs you to be there to comfort him not berate him with a million questions."

Sighing resignedly she shook her head in agreement. About an hour later Bellamy reemerged and the three sat on the couch eating junk food, none of them succeeding at ignoring the present circumstances. It wasn't until the next day when Bellamy explained his reasoning. There had been a rather large argument between the three of them all coming from a different standpoint. At the end of it all, she and her mom had to resign to the conditions Bellamy had already agreed to. A few days later the house was packed and movers came to get all of their things. Phone numbers had all been changed and the band was under strict instructions to not contact Clarke under any circumstances. It was as if a switch flipped and she had never been in their lives. Octavia mourned the loss of her friend, but even she couldn't go against her brother's wishes. 

*****PRESENT******

Lincoln just decided on lunch from the cafeteria so Octavia settled on the hospital food. She was almost finished with her meal when Bellamy returned. His face was unreadable and he made his way to sit in the chair next to her. She looked at him expectantly for a few moments before realizing he was content to stay quiet. 

"Are you gonna really make me ask?"

He shot her a calm down look before answering. "Geeze O, give me a second. I just got back."

Rolling her eyes she sighed exasperatedly. She'd only been waiting all day for the answer too. "Obviously, although I don't see why you can't go ahead and tell me what she said now."

Realizing his sister wasn't going to just give up he huffed irritated, "She has a kid O, and no I don't know anything else."

"Nothing? Not if she's married or the kid's name?"

"Nothing O."

With her curiosity even more heightened, she decided her conversation with Bellamy wasn’t going anywhere. Her mind immediately starting running through plans in order to find out more information for herself. 

The room became silent for a brief moment before Octavia changed the subject completely.

“Do you guys want to watch a movie?”

Bellamy threw a questioning look at the abrupt change but mumbled his agreement nonetheless.

With Avatar playing on the hospital tv the trio steered away from the elephant in the room.   
  
Sometime during the movie, Octavia’s second dose of medicine kicked in and her eyes drooped heavily. Before she realized it she had drifted off to sleep and didn’t wake up for a few hours.   
  


When she woke up again her mom was there with dinner.

”Hey sweetheart I brought you some soup from that Italian place you love.”

”Smells amazing, thanks, mom.”

Lincoln grabbed the soup from her mom and passed it gently into her awaiting hands. Bellamy sat in the corner eating his chicken parm. The news earlier still weighing heavily on his mind.

After dinner was finished Aurora convinced Bellamy to take a walk with her leaving Octavia and Lincoln alone.

Lincoln crawled into the bed beside her on the good side and she cuddled into his side. They talked a bit about the wedding before just enjoying the silence and each other’s company. 

Bellamy and Aurora didn’t come back for a couple of hours and Aurora didn’t stay for too long after that. 

The next morning Octavia couldn’t wait for the nurse to get there so her plan could be put into motion.

As soon as the nurse finished the basic checks Octavia found her opportunity.   
  


“Everything is looking good Miss Blake.”

”That’s really great to hear Yanet. I was hoping I could actually take a walk today.”

”I’m not sure that’s a good idea yet...”

”It’s a great idea and I promise I’ll stay close and I’ll have someone with me at all times. ”

The nurse thought about it for a moment before continuing.

”Well, I guess the change of scenery would do you good as long as you promise not to go to the main lobby or outside in any way.”

Smiling victoriously Octavia promised exactly that. 

With the discussion ended Yanet left and Octavia picked at the bland breakfast in front of her.

Same as her entire hospital stay they rotated games, movies and random conversations to pass the time.

Octavia watched the clock impatiently for the right moment to arrive. Finally, the time came.

Stretching a bit she pulled the cover back from her feet. Lincoln and Bellamy both noticed the shift and turned their attention from their phones. 

"Lincoln I think I want to go ahead and take a walk."

"Ok, are you sure you're up for it?"

"Yes, I'm one hundred percent sure."

"Alright then."

Lincoln stood up from his chair and helped her stand up. Once she was out of the bed she took a few steps to get a feel of her bearings. Taking hold of Lincoln's arm the two made their way to the door. 

Before they could leave Bellamy asked, "Do you want me to come and walk on the other side O?"

"Nope, I'm feeling pretty good. I want to do this on my own."

Unsatisfied with the answer Bellamy mumbled his agreement nonetheless.

A moment later she was free of her room and ready to go. They got to the elevators and Octavia looked over the map for her intended destination. 

"Lincoln let's go downstairs and walk a bit."

Looking unsure Lincoln hesitated. "I don't know if that's a good idea yet. Let's just start with a short walk."

"Nah I'm good. I really want to go downstairs."

Giving her an odd look he relented and led them into the elevator. When the doors had closed he spoke up. 

"What's the real reason you are taking such a specific walk, today babe?"

"I want to find out more about this Clarke situation. It's really messing with Bellamy's head and I'm curious for myself too."

Lincoln sighed resignedly. "I had a feeling that's what this was. Octavia, do you really think it's a good idea to get involved in all this? I'm sure Clarke has been through a lot and from the sounds of it, she seems happy. What if this makes things hard on her again?"

"Lincoln don't be so dramatic. We aren't going to interfere with her life, I just want to see for myself."

"I don't like this, but I know you won't let it go so let's just get it over with."

The elevator doors chimed and the couple stepped out onto the 1st floor. A short walk later and they got to the nursery hall. Anxiousness welled inside of her and she felt like a mystery detective on the edge of figuring out who the killer is. Lincoln walked anxiously beside her as well but it was clear he was nervous for an entirely different reason. She had been telling the truth when she said she wasn't going to interfere, in reality, she actually had no idea what she was going to do down here.

Luckily it seemed they arrived at just the right time when Clarke came out of the nursery being trailed by a little girl. Clarke didn't see them but Octavia could see everything she needed to. It was clear the little girl was upset at Clarke's departure. 

Octavia gripped Lincoln's arm even tighter for support. It was obvious that this was Clarke's daughter, but it was even more obvious to her was that it was also her niece. Emotions flooded her senses and Octavia couldn't sort them to even know how she was feeling. The nursery worker gently pulled her niece back into the nursery and closed the half door. Clarke straightened herself and started walking their direction. 

She hastily wiped away her tears as she finally looked up to see them standing there. 

Frozen in her tracks Octavia pulled away from Lincoln and walked right up to her. 

"What the heck Clarke? That's my niece, isn't it?"

Her tone came out harsher than she was trying to but it was clear all at once what emotion she was feeling. Anger welled up and emanated from her entire posture. Clarke wasn't startled a bit she squared her shoulders and stood up straight.

"Octavia now is not the time."

"When is the time then? When my brother has missed five years of his daughter's life or ten?"

Now it was Clarke's turn to be angry. Her neck grew red and she didn't miss a beat.

"THAT IS NOT MY FAULT! He left me!"

Octavia scoffed, angry sarcasm dripping off her words. "So you hid his daughter from him to get revenge?!"

"AS IF! I called! I searched for databases! I came to your mom's old house! I contacted the producer! I came to his shows! There was nothing for me to even find. Don't you even dare say this is my choice! You have no idea how much this has affected me! I hate every moment of being without him!"

Clarke's outburst took Octavia by surprise, Abby had obviously done extremely well at cutting off all forms of communication. Octavia didn't want to believe that Clarke had really tried to find them because then it would be easy to blame it all on the blonde. Bellamy wouldn't take this well in any way. It wasn't even his fault either. If only he'd known, they could've done something. Anything even. Her anger was dosed in ice water and she calmed down to a saddened state.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed. You should know there's more to the story though. Bellamy didn't leave you by choice."

Lincoln hissed from where he'd been silent. "OCTAVIA!"

Clarke stood there shellshocked and before she could formulate words the nursery workers yell cut through. 

"DR.GRIFFIN COME QUICK!"

Not even a second passed and Clarke was gone, Octavia struggled to keep up. She got to the door and saw Clarke leaning over her daughter yelling orders to the nursery worker. Her niece was on the ground and void of color, she was laying in a pool of vomit. Fear gripped her entire being. 

Less than a minute later she was pulled aside by Lincoln in order to make room for the team of nurses who flooded in to swoop up the little girl and rush her off on a stretcher. The lead doctor moved Clarke out of the way and told her to stay clear. 

Clarke followed behind the stretcher as long as she could until they passed into the OR threshold. A nurse named Maya, Octavia remembered, gripped Clarke's arms, holding her in place. 

"Dr. Griffin! Clarke! You can't go in! Dr. Masher will take good care of her. You know that. You will have to be taken to the waiting room to sit."

Clarke nodded numbly tears flowing down her face as she was led to the nearest chair. Maya turned her attention to Octavia just a moment later. Lincoln and Octavia caught up as she was sitting down and Octavia couldn't wait any longer. 

"What's going on? What's wrong with her?"

Clarke was startled by their presence but answered anyway "She has appendicitis, they took her in for emergency surgery. "

"Is she going to be ok?"

Clarke looked at her tearfully but didn't answer. Maya stepped in her place pushing a wheelchair Octavia hadn't noticed until now.

"Miss Blake, you have to go back to bed. I have no idea how you got this far. Please sit down."

Weighing her options she sat down quickly in the chair. It was her fastest route back to Bellamy.

Giving one last glance at Clarke she looked up at Lincoln and raised her voice. "We need to get to the room right away!'

Lincoln nodded and wheeled them at almost a running pace. The elevator doors couldn't open fast enough, as they took off down the last bit of the hall. 

The door was thrown open and Bellamy jumped from his seat in concern. 

"You have to go downstairs to the OR waiting room right now!"

Confusion filled his worried expression. "Why? What happened?"

"Clarke needs you! Her daughter is in surgery!"

"What?!"

"You have to go!"

Bellamy was filled with distraught emotions. His face reflected that of someone faced with a life-changing decision.

"I can't O! She doesn't want me there! Besides, what will her husband think?"

They didn't have time for this Octavia huffed in irritation. "JUST TRUST ME! GO NOW!"

Her yell took him off guard and collecting his phone he was out the door.

With the rush over Lincoln made Octavia get into bed and he pulled on the covers. Her mind raced a million miles an hour as she worried for her niece, for her brother, and for Clarke. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking with me!! Here’s a long awaited chapter! Please comment!

Clarke was up an hour before her alarm. There was so much running through her mind that there was no way she could stay asleep. She settled on taking a long shower to help herself wake up for the day. After the shower, she dressed and then made her way into the kitchen. Since she had extra time, she made some pancakes for her and liv and some Canadian bacon. Satisfied with breakfast, Clarke went into Liv's room and ran a hand over her baby's head. 

Livia woke up and let Clarke dress her but her eyes stayed closed until Clarke mentioned chocolate chip pancakes. She pulled her shirt the rest of the way down and ran to the kitchen.

They ate breakfast together before grabbing their things and running out the door. 

She dropped off Livia and got straight to work. Luckily the morning was pretty mundane and she was able to get through without dealing with any hospital or Bellamy drama. If only every morning could be like that. She even got to take a short break and talk to Raven. Around lunch, she went to the nursery as always to eat with Liv. 

Liv clung to her mom as soon as Clarke made it through the door. She refused to eat her lunch and when it was time for Clarke to go Liv broke down in tears melting down at Clarke's departure. The nursery worker had to extricate Liv's arms from Clarke's legs and it was all Clarke could do to pull away. 

She really hated leaving, especially when Liv got like this. Sometimes she even went into a full-blown meltdown and it was impossible to leave when she went into panic mode. Clarke couldn't help but let a few tears drip down her face at the sound of Liv's cries. She hastily wiped away her tears as she finally looked up to see Octavia and Lincoln standing only a few yards away. 

It was clear Octavia had seen the whole exchange at the nursery and her face was filled with fury. This was the last thing Clarke needed right now. Within a few moments, Octavia had stormed up to her. 

"What the heck Clarke? That's my niece, isn't it?"

Octavia was angry but it didn't surprise Clarke at all. She would not be intimidated by the brunette's tone. Octavia’s tantrum’s hadn’t affected Clarke in years and she definitely wasn’t going to be caught off guard now. 

"Octavia now is not the time."

"When is the time then? When my brother has missed five years of his daughter's life or ten?"

She was filled with frustration at the insinuation.

"THAT IS NOT MY FAULT! He left me!"

"So you hid his daughter from him to get revenge?!"

Octavia had gone way too far this time. Clarke barely controlled her tone when she replied. 

"AS IF! I called! I searched for databases! I came to your mom's old house! I contacted the producer! I came to his shows! There was nothing for me to find. Don't you even dare say this is my choice! You have no idea how much this has affected me! I hate every moment of being without him!"

Octavia froze and her anger dissipated, the next time she spoke her tone had softened considerably. 

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed. You should know there's more to the story though. Bellamy didn't leave you by choice."

Octavia's words cut through Clarke's heart like a hot knife. A sharp pain tore through her carefully constructed facade. What did she mean 'not by choice'?

She faintly heard Lincoln whisper yell, but she didn't care. "OCTAVIA!"

Her mind overflowed with questions until the nursery worker yelled "DR.GRIFFIN COME QUICK!"

Nothing would distract her from her baby. She turned around and sprinted to the nursery. Her little girl had fainted in the midst of the vomit and the nursery worker explained the situation. Doctor mode clicked in and she immediately recognized the signs of appendicitis. She yelled for transport to the OR and the leading pediatric surgeon to be paged immediately. What felt like just a few moments later the transport was there and she was pulled aside.

Dr. Masher spoke roughly but sternly "Clarke, you are her mother! You can't help! We got her, I promise."

Clarke trailed behind the stretcher as long as she could until she felt a strong grip on her upper arms. 

Maya stopped her right before they reached the OR.

"Dr. Griffin! Clarke! You can't go in! Dr. Masher will take good care of her. You know that. You will have to be taken to the waiting room to sit."

She couldn't help but cry at her overwhelming emotions. It wasn't until Octavia spoke up that she noticed they had followed her down the hall.

"What's going on? What's wrong with her?"

"She has appendicitis, they took her in for emergency surgery. "

Octavia's worried voice rang in Clarke's ears "Is she going to be ok?"

Clarke looked up but she couldn't find the strength to answer. Truthfully she didn't know and she couldn't bear to think of the possibility of losing Liv.

Maya brought a wheelchair for Octavia and insisted that she leave.

"Miss Blake, you have to go back to bed. I have no idea how you got this far. Please sit down."

Octavia relented and then Clarke was left with just Maya who walked with her to the waiting room.

"Is there someone I should call to sit with you, Clarke?"

"Please, My emergency contact, my brother Murphy."

Maya smiled in understanding " I'll give him a call."

Clarke's mind raced uncontrollably and she sat there trying to ignore worst-case scenarios. She struggled to breathe and she couldn't help but feel like the walls were closing in. Her vision swam with fog until all of a sudden she saw Bellamy come around the corner. 

She held it together until He was about a foot away and he started to say "Clarke, I know you probably don't want me here, but..."

He wasn't able to finish because, she launched herself into his arms, sobs wracking her small torso. Bellamy pulled them both onto the small bench-like love seat and held her while she cried. She thought of the hospital gossip in the back of her mind but couldn't find it in her heart to care at the moment. She had no idea why, but he was exactly what she needed right now. About five minutes later she was able to catch her breath and her sobs became a slow sniffle.

"It's gonna be ok Clarke. You're ok."

His soothing words helped calm her nerves and she relaxed into his hand rubbing circles in between her shoulders. They sat like that for a while until she was able to pull from his embrace.

It was silent all but the intermittent hospital announcements and the ticking of an old white clock above them. About thirty minutes passed and Murphy came bounding in the door, Emori trailing close behind. Clarke stood up and hugged him tightly. Murphy held her closely and scanned the room. When he stood back from the hug his eyes landed on Bellamy and a sour expression filled his features. 

"What is he doing here?"

Clarke stood in front of him putting a hand on his arm, almost protectively.

"Bellamy is with me, Murphy. He's helped me through the initial emotions."

It was obvious Murphy was irritated by the whole exchange. Emori, however, stepped in and gave Clarke a comforting hug.

"Are you ok?"

"I'm trying to be, you know? It's just they took her in for surgery and I haven't heard anything. She wasn't displaying symptoms of it actually bursting but you never know and it's still dangerous."

"She will be fine Clarke."

Clarke nodded feeling tears starting to reform. She felt a touch on her hand and she looked down to see Bellamy's hand wrapped around her wrist.

She allowed the gesture to soothe her and she sat back down next to Bellamy. Murphy was pulled to an adjacent bench by Emori while he glared daggers at Bellamy.

"She doesn't need you to stay anymore, the people who actually care about Clarke are here for her."

Bellamy wriggled a bit in his seat before strengthening. The comment only briefly bothering him.

"I will be here as long as Clarke wants me here."

Murphy stayed serious as a lion stalking their prey. His eyes were filled with anger and distrust. "She doesn't actually want you here."

This time Clarke leveled a gaze at her brother. She couldn’t deal with the two of them getting into a fight. "Murph, that's enough. I want him to stay."

Shaking his head in disagreement he leaned back in his chair and sighed. 

With the momentary drama subsided they lapsed into nervous in trepidation. 

Not long after, Maya came through the door. 

Clarke jumped from her seat, closely followed by Murphy and Emori. Bellamy stayed on the couch obviously to give them space out of respect for the circumstances, " How is she, Maya?"

"She's stable, still in surgery, but Clarke, she lost a lot of blood and she's going to need a transfusion."

Clarke felt her heart drop at the complication.

"You have it though, right?"

Maya's expression told her what she needed to know, "I'm sorry Clarke, but normally a parent can donate. Are you a match?"

Clarke shuffled through her thoughts. Desperately grabbing for any idea. "No, she has a rare blood type and she got it from her..." 

A realization smashed into Clarke like a freight train and suddenly she remembered. Her gaze snapped from Maya to Bellamya and then back to Maya. A plan was formulated and immediately put into effect.

"I know someone who has it, meet me in the exam room 5 with everything you need for a blood draw."

Maya brightened considerably at the news and hurried to answer "That's amazing news, I'll meet you as soon as I can."

Clarke steeled herself for the conversation in front of her. She walked over to Bellamy and spoke up "Bellamy I need you to come with me right away."

He was up in a second, and she led him into the exam room.

The door closed behind them and Clarke paced nervously before stopping directly in front of him. She figured the best course of action was just to spit it out. 

"Bellamy, my daughter, she lost a lot of blood and she needs a transfusion."

He gave her a look of understanding but he also had no idea the bomb she was about to drop on him. He tried his best to give her support.

"Ok, well I'll sit with you while you give blood if that's what you mean."

Running a hand through her hair she just had to get it over with. 

"No, Bellamy. I need you to donate it."

Confusion filled his features and he tilted his head slightly to the right. "I wish I could Clarke, but I have that rare blood type I got from my mom. I can only give blood to people with the exact type."

"Bellamy her name is Livia Lee Griffin-Blake. She's... She’s your daughter."

Bellamy's eyes blinked as he tried processing the information. He stumbled a bit until he made it to the chair next to the exam table. The bomb Clarke had been preparing, exploded in front of their eyes, sending shrapnel of emotion and pain in every direction. Clarke could almost see the gashes in Bellamy’s hardened exterior.

"I uh... I don't understand. How is that possible?"

Clarke felt bad at the amount of pressure she just placed on his shoulders, but she didn't have an option to ease into it at the moment. 

"I'm sorry Bellamy I never got the chance to tell you."

He looked up at her, emotions rampant and muddled all over his features.

"When did you know?"

"Seven weeks after the breakup. It happened the night before you were signed."

***4 YEARS AGO***

The move to New York had gone well all things considered. Murphy had gotten a job the week they'd arrived and the hospital was relatively easy. Clarke had been nauseous for a solid week and she'd written off her previous missed period to stress. She didn't think anything of it until she almost fainted during a shift.

Stopping by a convenience store on her way home she grabbed a dreaded pregnancy test. Once she was home she ran through the house straight to the bathroom. 

She took the test and sat it on the counter while she washed her hands. How could she have been so irresponsible? She couldn't get too ahead of her self yet, not until her thoughts were confirmed. 

Taking a deep breath she flipped over the little white stick in her hand.

Her heart sank like a rock, shattering into a million pieces. She slumped to the floor in defeat.

The little pink plus sign stared back at her as if to say “What now?”

Tears started streaming down her face and dripping off her chin onto the wet tile. 

She faintly heard the front door open and Murphy yell her name. A few minutes passed and the door opened.

“Clarke....”

His voice started strong but faded at her appearance.

Murphy let out an irritated huff before coming over and gently guiding her to her feet.

”Let’s get you up, it’s too cold down there.”

She allowed him to help her stand and lead her to the couch before they both plopped down onto it.

”What do you need me to do for you?”

Clarke sighed before putting the test she’d been clutching so tightly onto the coffee table in front of the couch and putting her head in her hands. 

”I don’t really know Murph. I’m definitely keeping it, but beyond that, I have no idea.”

He gave her a sad smile and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

”Well you know I’m here for you no matter what.”

”Thank you.”

The room grew quiet once more and Clarke’s mind only got louder. Her emotions were all over the place for obvious reason and she grappled for control once again.

”So are you gonna tell Bellamy?”

The pressure seemed to increase on her tenfold as she felt herself falling deeper into her jumbled emotions. She knew she had to tell him but she just didn’t know-how.   
  


**PRESENT**  
**

Bellamy’s face became completely unreadable at the new information.

”So she’s three then?”

”Yeah Bell, she’s three.”

He nodded and put his fist over her mouth stifling a sob.

Clarke was shocked, she expected him to be angry, to yell even, but this wasn’t something she would’ve ever thought to be prepared for. She stood awkwardly not knowing what to say when a tap resounded at the door.

Their current predicament came crashing back into Clarke’s mind, and she had to move past the heightened emotions that were washing through the room in waves.

”Bellamy I know it’s a lot right now, but can you please help her?”

He shot Clarke an incredulous look and huffed.

”Do you even have to ask?”

Clarke chose not to respond to him but instead spoke to Maya.

”Come on in Maya.”

Maya opened the door with a smile as she double-checked the contents of her hands.

”Hey Clarke, I got everything we need. Where’s the donor?”

”Bellamy is going to donate.”

Maya looked a little confused as she noticed the rockstar sitting on the opposite side of the room. 

“Dr.Griffin, I know this has been a stressful day, but I want to remind you that the specific protein in Livia’s blood is one and a million and the odds of someone who isn’t a parent being able to donate are even less than that.”

“Maya I’m invoking doctor-patient privileges in that what I tell you next does not leave this room, as well as where the blood came from. As far as anyone knows, you tell them I got it for you.” Clarke’s tone held an air of no-nonsense and it wasn’t up for discussion.

Maya nodded quickly and Clarke continued.

”Bellamy is Livia’s father.”

Maya’s eyes widened dramatically before she quickly pulled on a mask of professionalism.

”Oh, well that’s so great that he happened to be close.”

”Yeah.”

An awkward moment passed before the nurse continued on “Well I’ll get started then.”

Maya quickly got to work drawing the necessary blood. Bellamy stayed quiet during the whole exchange and Clarke avoided eye contact for the most part only glancing over in spurts. He’d slipped back into an unreadable state as soon as Maya had come through the door. 

Once the blood had been drawn Maya was up and out of the room, giving Bellamy instructions to stay put for just a bit before moving around. 

The door closed and Bellamy spoke up, his tone holding mostly sadness with hints of anger and confusion.

“Why didn’t you tell me at lunch? Or any day I’ve been here for that matter?”

Clarke at least was prepared for these emotions and she was able to keep a calm persona while she explained. ”I wasn’t ready yet and besides you’ve been going through a lot with Octavia already. I wasn’t going to just run up to you and yell it.”

Seemingly tolerant of her answer he pressed even further.

”Why’d you stop trying to find me to begin with?”

”Give me a break Bellamy. You up and leave for no reason and completely ghost me. Quite frankly I was angry at first when I couldn’t reach you. I quit for a little while because of hurt. Then after Liv was born I tried again, after a year of searching I just figured since you really didn’t want to be found, you didn’t deserve to know about this precious gift.”

The remaining bits of anger drained from his face while she was speaking. Pain dripped off her speech and certain words were hard to even get out. 

”I’m sorry Clarke if I had only known. I would have never abandoned her by choice.”

”I believe that. You only chose to leave me.”

Bellamy flinched at her words and looked away.

Clarke didn’t know if she could handle being in this room alone with him any longer, but there were still a few things that had to be discussed. Squaring her shoulders she persevered.

”Look, Bellamy, I know you probably have a hundred questions but right now I need to go back out and wait on news about Liv, and I don’t think it’s a good idea that you come.”

Affronted at her words he moved to stand up. His next words weren’t sad or emotional they were strong and fierce.

”She’s my daughter too!”

Clarke wouldn’t be pushed around, she stood up to his antics without missing a beat.

”That you didn’t know about until just now! You were fine without her!”

“That’s not fair! I didn’t have a chance to even know!”

”Well I sure gave you plenty, I’m sorry I was so repulsive to you that you had to hide your entire family from me!”

With every word, they got closer and their words held more venom. 

”That’s not what happened!”

”I don’t care Bellamy! You aren’t dragging her into your paparazzi mess here at my work! I have enough to deal with!”

”They are gonna find out anyway! I’m never going to leave her again! And you sure as heck won’t keep me away!”

Clarke scoffed at his audacity. She would protect her baby from him or anyone if she had to. ”I’m her mother and I say what’s best for my child!”

”OUR CHILD! She’s OUR daughter Clarke!”

“You weren’t there! You weren’t there when I found out I was pregnant! You weren’t there when I almost died having her! You weren’t there when she took her first steps! You missed her first birthday, her second birthday and her third! You missed every late night and time she cried! You just weren’t!”

The room went silent after her tirade and she wiped her face realizing she’d started crying sometime during her speech. Bellamy’s countenance had calmed and they stood a foot apart. He put one hand on her arm and used the other to lift her chin to look into her eyes.

His next words were soft and coated in regret.

”I know I wasn’t and I know I can’t make it up to you or her, but I can promise I will never leave again. I’m sorry I hurt you both.”

Clarke couldn’t find any words to say so she only nodded.

”With that said, I know you are scared of the paparazzi being invasive, but you’re gonna have to trust me in this area. It will be a lot at times but I’ll be there to protect her.”

Clarke sighed heavily ”You’re right. I’m so scared. But Livia needs you now more than ever, and I can’t withhold you from knowing her. I just need you to know that no turning back after this decision. You are in forever, every time she needs you, you have to be there.”

“I know what I’m getting into Clarke.”

His eyes held sincerity to them and Clarke held his gaze before conceding.

”I hope so. For now, we have to go, Livia should be coming out of surgery soon.”

Bellamy agreed and then held the door open. Clarke left first with him trailing and he gently closed the door behind them.


	11. Chapter 11

The Nurse came through the door to give an update on Clarke’s daughter but Bellamy wanted to be respectful of Clarke’s space so he lingered on the bench in the waiting room. Clarke looked at him before making eye contact and turning back to the nurse. A chill ran down his spine at the look of determination she shot him. The next thing he knew she was standing directly in front of him with her hand out.

"Bellamy I need you to come with me right away."

He was confused but stood up anyway, and he had barely gotten to his feet when she gripped his arm and tugged him along hurriedly.

She pulled them into some sort of exam room and shut the door behind them. His mind was racing as Clarke emanated stress and worry. Suddenly she stopped and spoke up.

"Bellamy, my daughter, she lost a lot of blood and she needs a transfusion."

He figured this must be why she was so nervous so he tried his best to comfort her.

"Ok, well I'll sit with you while you give blood if that's what you mean."

"No, Bellamy. I need you to donate it."

His brain stuttered on her words as the cogs in his brain malfunctioned. Seeing only one possible option he replied.

"I wish I could Clarke, but I have that rare blood type I got from my mom. I can only give blood to people with the exact type."

"Bellamy her name is Livia Lee Griffin-Blake. She's... She’s your daughter."

Bellamy's heart exploded with emotion in his chest. The air in his lungs was sucked out as the room began to spin. He felt for a chair as he stumbled around the room and finally found one. Suddenly he felt small as the world became out of reach.

"I uh... I don't understand. How is that possible?"

Her face saddened and she looked at him with pity and he hated how it made him feel.

"I'm sorry Bellamy I never got the chance to tell you."

"When did you find out? When did it happen?"

He couldn’t get over the new information but he kept pressing for understanding.

"Seven weeks after the breakup. It happened the night before you were signed."

As soon as she mentioned the night he knew exactly when she meant.

***4 YEARS AGO***

Bellamy opened the door to Clarke’s apartment with the weight of the world on his shoulders. He’d just left Abby and he was only left with the worst option he could have imagined. All he wanted was to see Clarke. Even though it was probably the last time he could be with her like this.

She turned a corner and smiled brightly at the sight of her boyfriend, the very person she had no idea was about to crush her heart the next day. Bellamy couldn't let his mind go there, right now he just needed Clarke. 

He crashed into her, pulling her into his chest and intensely pressing his lips against hers. He conveyed all his emotion into the kiss tears rolling down his cheeks.

She leaned back from him and concern filled her features. " Bellamy, what's going on?"

Her words and voice only made his heartache increase. He shook his head and plead "Please no questions, I just need to be with you. Remember I love you."

Her concern only grew but sensing his distress she allowed him to pour his emotions into their physical interactions. 

They collided again kissing fiercely, Bellamy lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He carried her in the room and shut the door behind them. The rest of the night was a blur and Bellamy tried to remember everything he could, knowing it was the last night he'd ever spend with the love of his life.

The next morning he extricated Clarke from his arms and climbed out of bed. Taking an extra moment to take in her beautiful face he let himself silently grieve. Before he let himself get too emotional, Bellamy dressed and left for the meeting with the record label before she could even wake up. There was no way he could face her after everything. This would forever be one of the hardest days Bellamy would ever have to face. Taking a deep breath he pushed the door to her apartment closed and tried to mentally prepare for the emotional war he was walking into.

**PRESENT**  
**

Bellamy could almost still feel the turmoil of that day and the love he'd tried to show Clarke all in one night. His mind raced as he calculated the time that had passed since that infamous night and wanted to confirm his math ”So she’s three then?”

”Yeah Bell, she’s three.”

Hearing Clarke confirm it, made everything even more real. He'd missed three years of his daughter's life because of a deal he'd made four years ago. Here he was feeling sorry for himself all these years and he was the real villain in this story. Bellamy was overcome with emotion as his mind ran in overdrive mode. He covered his mouth so his cries wouldn't echo in the tiny room. 

He pulled himself in from the spiral when a tap resounded at the door.

A panicked look returned to Clarke's face as she asked.

”Bellamy I know it’s a lot right now, but can you please help her?”

Irritated that she would even think of him that lowly he huffed in frustration.

”Do you even have to ask?”

Clarke chose not to respond to him but instead spoke to the nurse who had knocked.

”Come on in Maya.”

Maya came through the door and Bellamy faintly recognized the two women were conversing. He couldn't even hear them over the screaming thoughts in his head.

He registered the prick of the needle but he didn't even care as he collected his thoughts for the impending conversation. 

Once Maya had collected the blood she said something to him and was out the door. As soon as the door closed he found the strength to ask the question pressing the heaviest on him. He couldn't help the anger that leaked out with it.

“Why didn’t you tell me at lunch? Or any day I’ve been here for that matter?”

Clarke seemed unbothered by his tone and answered seamlessly. ”I wasn’t ready yet and besides you’ve been going through a lot with Octavia already. I wasn’t going to just run up to you and yell it.”

It almost irritated him further that she was being so calm. How could she stand there like everything he knew wasn't falling apart?

”Why’d you stop trying to find me to begin with?”

Her face dropped and he could hear the pain in her voice, pain that he'd caused. ”Give me a break Bellamy. You up and leave for no reason and completely ghost me. Quite frankly I was angry at first when I couldn’t reach you. I quit for a little while because of hurt. Then after Liv was born I tried again, after a year of searching I just figured since you really didn’t want to be found, you didn’t deserve to know about this precious gift.”

Here he was upset because of the shock she'd placed on him and he'd forgotten the things she'd dealt with.

”I’m sorry Clarke if I had only known. I would have never abandoned her by choice.”

”I believe that. You only chose to leave me.”

Bellamy felt as if he'd been slapped. Her statement was true but he would have never left her in different circumstances. While he felt like crumbling, Clarke only grew stronger and continued on. 

”Look, Bellamy, I know you probably have a hundred questions but right now I need to go back out and wait on news about Liv, and I don’t think it’s a good idea that you come.”

Outraged at her implication he stood up to face her. There was no one who would keep his child away when he just found out about her. 

”She’s my daughter too!”

Clarke stayed as fierce as ever and despite the circumstances, it reminded Bellamy of why he loved her.

”That you didn’t know about until just now! You were fine without her!”

“That’s not fair! I didn’t have a chance to even know!”

”Well I sure gave you plenty, I’m sorry I was so repulsive to you that you had to hide your entire family from me!”

With every word, they got closer and their words held more venom. Her perspective was so skewed, not that she could help it, but it still infuriated him.

”That’s not what happened!”

”I don’t care Bellamy! You aren’t dragging her into your paparazzi mess here at my work! I have enough to deal with!”

”They are gonna find out anyway! I’m never going to leave her again! And you sure as heck won’t keep me away!”

”I’m her mother and I say what’s best for my child!”

Bellamy couldn't stand the fact that she had excluded him in her statement. He just found out, what did she expect from him?

”OUR CHILD! She’s OUR daughter Clarke!”

“You weren’t there! You weren’t there when I found out I was pregnant! You weren’t there when I almost died having her! You weren’t there when she took her first steps! You missed her first birthday, her second birthday and her third! You missed every late night and time she cried! You just weren’t!”

With the first part of her statement tears had started to roll down her face and Bellamy forced himself to calm down for her sake. This conversation wasn't healthy and he couldn't push her any farther. Feeling guilty at his harsh actions, he softened and at the end of her speech he put one hand on her arm and used the other to lift her chin to look into her eyes.

”I know I wasn’t and I know I can’t make it up to you or her, but I can promise I will never leave again. I’m sorry I hurt you both.”

Clarke's tear-filled eyes looked up at him hopefully and his heart melted at the sight. How could he ever hurt this woman? He would never let go of her again and no matter what it took, he would earn her forgiveness. 

”With that said, I know you are scared of the paparazzi being invasive, but you’re gonna have to trust me in this area. It will be a lot at times but I’ll be there to protect her.”

”You’re right. I’m so scared. But Livia needs you now more than ever, and I can’t withhold you from knowing her. I just need you to know that no turning back after this decision. You are in forever, every time she needs you, you have to be there.”

“I know what I’m getting into Clarke.”

”I hope so. For now, we have to go, Livia should be coming out of surgery soon.”

Bellamy agreed and then held the door open. Clarke left first with him trailing and he gently closed the door behind them.

When they got back to the waiting room a muffled argument was taking place.

He felt Clarke grip his arm as they saw the source of the commotion. Octavia had snuck out of her room again and she and Murphy were in each other's faces yelling in whispered tones. Emori sat trying to calm the argument down and Lincoln was half arguing half holding Octavia back. He could catch bits and pieces of the argument but he knew it was obviously about him. Bellamy didn't have time for this, his daughter's life was on the line and Clarke was barely holding on to her emotions. Striding over quickly he got in the middle of them and snapped.

"Both of you shut up! Octavia! You have to sit down!"

Murphy went to retort but Clarke spoke up beside him.

"That means you too Murphy."

Irritated he shot them both a look. Octavia rolled her eyes but allowed Lincoln to sit her down onto the chair. 

He tried processing what to say but Clarke beat him to it, her voice holding authority and no room for argument. 

"Look we both understand that this is a very high-pressure situation. We are all on edge, but my daughter is in surgery right now and I don't even know if she will make it. So help me, if any of you act like two-year-old or cause any more problems I will have you escorted away by security. Is that clear enough for you?"

The group mumbled but no one would dare combat mama bear. Satisfied with their reluctant acceptance she walked off to the restroom.

He chose to take a seat next to Octavia who leaned over and asked. " So what happened?"

"Well, I just found out that I'm a father of a three-year-old if that's what you mean."

Before Octavia could respond Murphy interjected "You aren't her father, you're a sperm donor. A FATHER wouldn't abandon his family." Murphy stressed the word father and Bellamy struggled to reign in his temper.

"I didn't abandon my child! I didn't know she existed!"

Murphy scoffed " See that's just the thing, I didn't say child I said, family. I was talking about Clarke, not Liv. You have no idea what you did to her."

Emori put a hand on his arm and cut him off "No John! That is not yours to talk about!"

Shaking her off he continued. "No Emori, he needs to know this! Clarke was crushed when you left her, I couldn't get her to eat or sleep or anything. She started her job here in New York like a zombie. Just masking her pain by throwing herself into a job. When she found out she was pregnant, she tried for months to find you, every time she'd try something different she would have hope and when it was a dead-end, I was left to pick up the pieces. She rebuilt herself on her own as a single mom and she's done so well by her child. You don't have the right to just waltz back in her life like you didn't cause the wreckage she's worked for years to clean up."

"Look, Murphy, I know you are mad and at the bottom of it all, you are just trying to protect your sister. Let me make it perfectly clear to you that I know the mess I've caused, but no one is going to be able to get rid of me now that I know about my child."

Bellamy felt like he was in an Old Western standoff and there was no way he'd back down from this one. 

"Do you even know her name? Do you even know why that's what Clarke chose?"

"Her name is Livia Lee Griffin Blake, and by the way I do, because I'm her father whether you like it or not. She's named Livia because that's the name Clarke and I chose one night while we laid together on a picnic blanket. Livia is a roman emperor's wife and Lee is Clarke's dad's middle name. She's named Griffin- Blake because Clarke is strong and while she wants her kids to have her last name she also wants them to have the last name of their father. "

Murphy mumbled irritatedly but sat back in his chair. It was only then that Bellamy realized Clarke had walked up behind him at some point in the conversation. He only wondered how much she heard. 

Clarke gave him a sad smile before she sat down in the chair next to Emori and put her head on Emori's shoulder. Bellamy could almost see the massive weight on her shoulders and his hands itched to lift it off for her. 

Time ticked on until finally, Maya reemerged. This time Bellamy was the first to his feet, followed closely by Clarke and then the rest of the group. 

Before Clarke could even say a word Maya answered. "Livia is doing well Clarke, the transfusion was successful and we expect her to make a full recovery. She's still under anesthesia but she will be waking up in a little over an hour." 

Both he and Clarke let out the breaths they'd been holding almost simultaneously.

Clarke didn't hesitate a moment before asking " When can we see her?"

"I'll take the parents right now. "

They nodded in unison and with promises to text the others any updates, they left to follow Maya.

Bellamy's heart pounded with every step they made towards the room. He was hit with the realization that he was gonna see his daughter for the first time. What if she didn't like him? What if he messes everything up? His nerves escalated and they rounded the last corner.

The little girl on the bed took his breath away. She was so beautiful and her dark hair laid loosely around her shoulders. Her soft facial features reminded him so much of Clarke but also a young Octavia that his heart felt like it was being squeezed. Clarke hurried past him to the side of Livia's bed. She tenderly brushed Livia's hair from her forehead and kissed her temple. Bellamy scooted his way around the room gingerly getting closer.

He stood at an awkward distance not knowing what to do. Clarke looked up and sent him a warm smile before lifting her hand and gently enclosing it around his and softly speaking "It's ok Bellamy, you can come closer."

Gulping nervously he took the last step to the bed. She placed his hand on top of Livia's and Bellamy choked back tears. They'd created this perfect little baby together and he didn't even know.

Livia stirred a bit and Bellamy thought of something. "Uh Clarke, as much as I want to meet her. She's gonna be scared probably when she wakes up and I don't want to overwhelm her. So how about tomorrow when she's calm, you can introduce me to her then?"

Clarke thought about it for a moment before responding " You're right, that's a great idea."

"Ok, then I'll go home and clean up, and I'll be here around nine tomorrow. I'd like to bring her something too, though. What kind of things does she like?"

"You don't have to do all that Bellamy, she's going to like you no matter what."

"I hope so, but she's been through a lot and a toy never hurts."

Chuckling a bit at his process she answered " She loves, finding dory stuff, coloring books, stuffed animals, bright-colored toys, musical toys, dolls, and really anything that a normal three-year-old would like. "

"Sounds good, and I'll also get some food sent up for you to eat dinner tonight."

"Don't worry about me Bellamy, I'm fine."

"Clarke I know you're 'fine'" He couldn't help but put air quotes on the word fine. Clarke hated to admit it when she was struggling but Bellamy would forever see through it. "But I'm gonna send the food anyways."

She smiled shyly but agreed "Thanks, Bellamy."

"Anytime. Text me when she wakes up completely and any updates. I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow."

Bellamy sent her one last warm smile as he shut the door behind him. After he sent a call in for Uber Eats he made his way to his G-Wagon and pulled out of the parking lot. He got back to his apartment for the first time since the whole Octavia incident. Bellamy went straight to the shower and allowed the steaming water to ease his tight muscles. He towel-dried and then slipped into a pair of pajama shorts before heading back out into the kitchen. 

Suddenly a voice made him almost drop the glass of water he'd just gotten.

"Bellamy?"

Realizing it was just his mom a moment later he let out a huff.

"Sorry mom, I forgot you were staying here."

She looked at him with concern as she walked into the kitchen.

"Are you ok Bellamy? You seem stressed."

Figuring now was better than later he moved to explain the situation. 

"Mom you'd better sit down for this."

The worry on her face grew more intense at his statement. "It's not Octavia, right?"

"No, Octavia's fine."

She emitted a sigh of relief as she took a seat at the counter.

"So what's going on?"

Bellamy recounted the story just how it unfolded and Aurora went through various forms of shock. By the time he finished, she sat there flabbergasted and without words. A few minutes passed before she broke the silence. 

"When you told me Clarke might have a daughter I didn't even let myself think that she might be yours. Now that we know she is, you have to do your best to make up for all the time you've missed, and more importantly, you have to tell Clarke the truth."

Irritated that his mom was right he finished eating his sandwich. "I know, I just don't know how to do it. "

She gave him a sad look. "You'll know the time when it comes, just trust yourself, and above that trust that you are gonna be a great father."

"Mom you don't know that. What if she doesn't even like me?"

"Bellamy, all a little girl wants is to be with her dad. Besides, you are an amazing person and she's gonna love you."

"Ok. Well, I'm gonna get some sleep because I want to wake up early and get her the perfect gift and pick Clarke up some breakfast."

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight mom"

He crawled under his covers and tossed a bit before passing out. The bedside alarm rang and he dressed in a pair of plain jeans and a light t-shirt. Luckily the store was empty at this time of morning and he debated with himself for almost an hour before settling on a stuffed Dory. He ran by a cafe for some omelets and croissants before getting to the hospital. 

Even after all his errands, it was only 8:30 am so he sent Clarke text to see if it was alright that he was early. When she responded that it was, he readied himself and went up the elevator to Livia's floor. Bellamy tapped on the door lightly and Clarke called for him to come in.

Nerves abounded as he pressed the door open. Livia sat up in the bed with some toys from a suitcase he saw open in the corner of the room. Someone must have brought it for Clarke. Dummy! Why hadn't he thought of that! Shaking off the disappointment in himself he smiled brightly and made the first tenuous step into the room. 

Livia looked at him curiously and looked to Clarke for answers. 

"Momma, who's that?"

Clarke smiled at her in the warmest way Bellamy had ever seen and it struck him that was undoubtedly an amazing mother. The care she had for the little girl was written on everything she did. Her answer to Livia's question almost made his heart burst.

"Baby, this is Bellamy. He's your daddy."

Livia's smile widened as she looked from Clarke to him and back to Clarke. "Really mommy?"

"Yes baby, really."

Bellamy held out the stuffed Dory almost like a sacrificial lamb as he walked closer. She nervously reached for the Dory from Bellamy's outstretched hands.

Realizing he should say something Bellamy spoke up "Hi Livia, your mommy has told me so much about you. I'm really excited to meet you."

She looked to Clarke for silent permission before speaking up "Hi, thank you for Dory. I really like it."

"Oh, um I'm really glad you like it."

"Do you want to see my other toys?"

Giving Clarke an excited look he happily agreed. Bellamy was completely entranced by everything about Livia. He watched every move she made and listened to every inflection of her tiny voice. 

She was more perfect than he could have ever imagined. The fact that he and Clarke had made such an amazing little person just blew his mind. After a few minutes of staring at Liv, he lifted his eyes to her mother.

Clarke watched the two of them interact lovingly, and Bellamy’s heart lurched in pain. Clarke had done so well raising their little girl all by herself. He wanted to cry, he’d missed so much already.

Looking between the two of the girls he vowed that he wouldn’t miss another important moment in their lives


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hitting a bit of a writer's block. Please comment. Thank you to all my readers!

Clarke watched Livia’s chest rise and fall almost obsessively. She closely monitored her vitals and watched for any variation. Bellamy and Liv had played until lunchtime and after lunch, Livia had fallen asleep for a nap. Liv's Nurse had come and gone throughout the day, checking on Liv and flirting with Bellamy. It annoyed Clarke but at least Bellamy didn't even seem to notice the pathetic attempt to gain his attention. He was too enthralled with Livia's every move.

Stirring her own salad in silence she avoided any eye contact with Bellamy who sat on the opposite side of Liv’s bed. In the aftermath of the day’s explosion, Clarke’s emotions were shot. Clarke’s plan that was once so clear was now clouded. 

As if he was reading her mind Bellamy voiced her exact question.

”So what do we do now?”

”Well we can figure out what’s best for Liv. I mean you just met her and we need to see how to ease her into this.”

Bellamy looked thoughtful before speaking up 

“She’s gonna need someone to take care of her while she recovers from this. I don’t have any concerts for a few weeks, and I know you have to work so I can stay with her while you’re gone.”

“No Bellamy, that’s too much. Besides Murphy and Emori can help as well as Wells and Raven. ”

Irritation flicked across his face before he reigned it back in. 

”Clarke I’ve missed four years, I’m not just stepping to the side and watching other people continue to raise “MY DAUGHTER.”

His attitude flared as he enunciated the last part. Clarke resisted the urge to raise her tone and instead stood up from her chair and pointed to the bathroom. Understanding what she meant Bellamy followed suit.

Once the door had closed, she stepped up toe to toe with Bellamy. Looking up into his eyes she whispered harshly.

”My daughter has been raised by people who love her and have been there since the beginning. ‘THEY’ are all Livia knows. You don’t get to just come in here and make demands!”

Filled with regret Bellamy softened. “Look Clarke I’m sorry. There’s something I need to tell you, so that we can move forward as co-parents. It's not going to be easy to hear, but you have to understand the reason I had to leave.”

Emotions bubbled at the surface threatening to spill over. Nevertheless, she pushed through so she could hear what she'd been wondering for so long. "Ok."

Taking a deep breath, Bellamy recounted the story.

******4 YEARS AGO******

**Bellamy had just left the doctor's appointment with his mom and wandered into his apartment. To his surprise, someone was sitting in his living room obviously waiting for him to get home.**

**"Senator Griffin?"**

**Her voice held an air of arrogance as she spoke. " Hello, Bellamy."**

**"I'm confused, are you looking for Clarke?"**

**"No, I'm actually here for you."**

**His confusion only grew at her words. "Me? Why are you looking for me?"**

**"I'd like to make a proposition for you."**

**"Ok..."**

**"I heard of your mom's condition and I'm prepared to make you an offer."**

**"An offer?"**

**She smirked as she leaned forward. "I know your family doesn't have the money to pay for her treatment, and I have specific connections at that record label company you have a meeting with. I will personally make out a check, in advance so Aurora can start her treatment and I'll make sure that money will never be an issue again."**

**Bellamy was shocked and he tried to find the right reply. "Wow, you would do that for us?"**

**"Of course, but there's a catch."**

**Bellamy's excitement turned sour in his heart. "What do you mean?"**

**"You will break up with Clarke and cut all contact with her."  
**

**Bellamy stood up abruptly anger filling his entire being. "WHAT?! NO! NEVER!"**

**Abby stood as calmly as ever "You see, that's the thing. I wasn't really asking. If you don't agree well then that deal with the record label will fall through and I'll make sure you won't find work anywhere. With your mom getting sicker she obviously can't work for much longer. That little sister of yours will have to drop out of that precious college she worked so hard to get a scholarship from. Even then I doubt she will make enough money to support you three and pay for the medical bills."**

**Backed into a corner Bellamy's heart burst. He refused to let this vile woman see him break down. "How could you do this to your own child?"**

**"That's actually where you're wrong. I'm doing this for Clarke. She has a promising career as a surgeon. She's at the top of her class, and quite frankly you aren't good for her. If she stays with you she will end up no better than just some roadie living off you. It's all just bad for her image and frankly, I can't have it coming public either."**

**"That's not true. Clarke is going to be a surgeon, and she would not give that up just to follow me around. This is really about your image! You think that if she goes wayward it will harm the campaign on you running for another term!"**

**Laughing humorously Abby frowned "Smart boy. Although I think you are wrong about Clarke's motivation, and I can't take the chance that she won't follow through with becoming someone actually reputable. So do we have an agreement?"**

**"I guess I don't have an option, now do I?"**

**Satisfied with his answer Abby collected her belongings and made her way to the door. " I'm glad you could see reason and also, Bellamy if Clarke finds out about this, the deal is off."**

**"Yeah, yeah. Just get out."**

**"Nice doing business with you Bellamy."**

**The door clicked and Bellamy collapsed onto the old high back chair in the corner. His head fell into his hands and he finally let himself break down.**

******PRESENT******

Bellamy finished recounting the story and all Clarke could hear was the thudding in her ears.

"I can't even believe she would do that. She doesn't even speak to me."

"I'm sorry Clarke, I know your relationship with Abby is already rocky."

Clarke held up a hand as she processed the new information. Pain laced her words. "So why now? Why tell me after everything now and not then?"

"I was scared then, and now she can't affect me."

Tears clouded her vision. "We could have figured it out, Bellamy. If you had just told me I could have paid for it. You didn't need my mom to help you."

Her emotions mirrored in his eyes and tears slipped down his cheeks. " I was scared Clarke, I had just found out my mom had cancer, and a part of me thought Abby was right. I wasn't good enough for you."

Clarke put her hand on his arm "Bellamy you were always more than enough for me, and we would have gotten through it together."

Bellamy wrapped his hand around her side and pulled her closer. "Clarke I..."

Before he could finish Liv's voice came through the door "Mommy?"

Clarke pulled away in a second and was out the door. 

Livia was sitting up sleepily and Clarke laid a hand on her back "I'm here. Mommy is here. You were only asleep for a little while, and you need to go back to sleep."

"Where's daddy?"

Just then Bellamy stepped out of the bathroom from behind her. "I'm right here baby. Now listen to mommy and close your eyes."

Looking at him warily she asked "You won't leave?

Clarke smiled "I won't leave Liv."

"Daddy too?"

Worry crept into Clarke's mind. She didn't like how much Livia already was attached to Bellamy. Looking at the way Bellamy's eyes were lit up gave her a little bit of comfort. 

"I'm not going anywhere either."

Nodding, she had fallen back to sleep in just a few moments. Clarke exhaled a sigh of relief as she sat back down into her previous chair. This time Bellamy came and sat next to her. 

She picked up her phone and answered a few emails avoiding any conversation with Bellamy. She just needed time to process what he'd said in the bathroom earlier. Also, her heart yearned to just be with him, and that part confused her the most. No, she couldn't allow herself to go there. If they were going to do well as co-parents then she needed to keep her head out of the clouds. She was scrolling through her social media when an article caught her attention. Tapping it quickly she read the headline. 'IS THERE ANOTHER REASON BELLAMY BLAKE IS AT ARK MEMORIAL?'

Directly underneath the heading was a picture of her and Bellamy in front of the elevators talking. This was exactly what Clarke didn't want to happen. Why couldn't they just have a little bit of peace before these vultures swooped in? 

"Bellamy, did you see this article?"

He looked up from his own phone to read the news in question.

'Sources at the hospital have informed us that Mr. Blake was seen talking to this woman on multiple occasions and in one incident he even ran after her. We've identified the woman as Dr.Clarke Griffin the daughter of Senator Abigail Griffin. Our department has done some digging and there's not much to find on this Doctor. Which of course only made us more suspicious. A talented member of our team did find one piece of evidence linking her to Mr. Blake and that was his high school yearbook. Apparently Ms. Griffin went to highschool with our rockstar, and when we looked closely at some of his pre-fame concerts she was sighted on multiple occasions. Once we linked the two, the question became "what were they to each other?'. Friends, Lovers, Acquaintances, or Enemies? If you think the drama ends there folks, you're in for a treat. An unnamed source made this story much more interesting when she told us that Ms.Griffin has a daughter. You may be asking why this matters, and we were too. Until apparently Ms. Griffin's daughter was rushed in for emergency surgery and Bellamy Blake was spotted sitting next to Ms. Griffin in the waiting room. Things only got more interesting when he and Ms. Griffin disappear together and then reappear thirty minutes later. So what were they doing? Why was Bellamy seen sitting with her? How close is he to this woman? We intend to find out, so keep checking our website for updates. You heard it here first at Sleuth Magazine.'

Bellamy finished reading and sighed. "I know this is a lot for you, Clarke. A part of me is glad you haven't had to deal with it for the last few years, but unfortunately, this is a part of who I am now. It's going to be something that comes up in your life now. You'll get used to it quicker than you think."

"I don't like it one bit. I want to protect my daughter."

"Our daughter will be fine. We will protect her the best we can. In fact, I'll have my security usher you out of here tomorrow."

Clarke huffed "Like that's not gonna make it worse?"

"You're probably right. I'll distract the paparazzi while you two sneak out of the back."

“That sounds like a better plan.”

”Ok so that’s settled. How long does it take to recover from appendicitis?”

“At least two weeks but most likely four.”

“That’s a little longer than I was thinking so it’s probably best if I just come stay with you guys a little while. Do you have a spare room?”

”I don’t want to trouble you with all that Bellamy.”

”Clarke, it’s no trouble. I want to be there her, and start making up for everything.”

She felt a little uncomfortable at his offer to help, she’d been doing so much on her own and now here he was offering to actually step up and partner with her. Realizing she couldn’t let that get in the way she agreed “Yeah we have a spare bedroom, but I don’t really want the paparazzi at our house. Do you think you could throw them off somehow?”

”Absolutely, I do it all the time. I’ll go to my house in the morning and pack everything I need and then come back to distract the paparazzi until you guys are at home. I’ll do a car switch and send my normal car to my apartment building. They won’t try to look for me anywhere else.”

”Ok, but Bellamy you know that being with Liv here at the hospital and even being there with me will be different than you having her alone for long stretches of time.”

”I know Clarke, I know it’s a big deal, but I can handle it. I’m not taking it lightly, I promise.”

”As long as you are aware of what you are getting into, I’m not going to keep you away.”

Bellamy’s serious face was replaced by one of excitement and warmth. Clarke couldn’t help but smile too.   
  
Not too long after their conversation, Livia woke up and she returned to being the center of attention. They played games and with toys until dinner and after dinner, they watched a princess movie. When the movie was over Clarke got up and turned off the tv.

”Alright sweet pea, it’s getting late now and it’s time for our princess to go to sleep.”

Livia’s little lips formed a frown and her voice saddened “Mmk Mommy, but can daddy kiss me goodnight too?”

”Of course.”

Happy with Clarke’s reply Liv smiled and pulled the stuffed dory closed to her chest. Clarke pulled the covers up around Liv’s arms and then bent down and kissed her forehead. Bellamy bent down and did the same from his spot on the other side of the bed.

”Don’t forget the song momma!”

Clarke’s face flushed but there was no getting out of it. She avoided Bellamy’s surprised reaction as she sang their old song to their little girl.

' ** _Doesn't matter where you go, Doesn't matter where you are. A million miles away or side by side. I will always love you. My heart will always sing your name. I will only dream of us together. Doesn't matter where you go. Doesn't matter where you are. A million miles away or side by side. I will always love you.'_**

By the time she had finished Livia was drifting off and Clarke whispered: “ Goodnight Liv, I love you.”

”Love you too momma. Night daddy.”

Clarke moved quickly, using the brief moment of silence to go ahead and step to her suitcase and get a set of pajamas out.

”Bellamy, I’m gonna shower and change. Can you make sure you stay with her while I do?”

Still a little awestruck by the song he agreed kind of dumbly.

Not waiting for him to shake off the surprise she went into the bathroom and hopped into the shower. The hot water worked as pressure relief to help Clarke relax after the emotionally draining and confusing day. She purposely steered her thoughts away from anything stressful. After lingering just a bit longer than usual she reluctantly turned off the water and stepped out.   
  


Slipping on her black silk shorts and a pink tank top she worked up the courage to go back to Liv and Bellamy. Liv was perfectly sound asleep but Bellamy looked up from his phone and let his eyes run over her. Feeling a little nervous under his gaze after all this time Clarke tried not to squirm.   
  


“Um, I think I’m gonna go ahead and shower too.”

”Oh, uh ok.”

For the first time, Clarke noticed a black leather backpack sitting in the corner. The nerves that had settled a bit in the shower resurfaced. Why hadn’t she prepared herself for this? Of course, he would stay. He’s not gonna leave unless she tells him too, which of course she won’t, especially with Liv being so clingy and emotional today. Looking around the room she eyeballed the one oversized twin cot and the little wooden chairs. She couldn’t think about it’s meaning quite yet. So she shook herself picking up her copy of 'Pride and Prejudice' she turned to where she'd last left off. She'd only read a chapter when Bellamy reemerged from the bathroom in a fitting black t-shirt and grey work out shorts.

Now it was Clarke's turn to try not to stare. She didn't really succeed, instead allowing her gaze to linger on his toned and muscular chest and arms that were accentuated from the tight-fitting shirt. Snapping her eyes back to the book she hoped he didn't see her looking. The chair next to her squeaked as he sat down. Not even five minutes had passed when his voice cut through. 

"So that song..."

Clarke inwardly screamed. Of course, she hadn't dodged that bullet as she had hoped.

"When Liv was a couple of days old, she wouldn't calm down. She was so exhausted but I just couldn't get her to settle. So I starting singing and by the time I had finished the song, Liv had fallen asleep. I ended up singing it every night and now she won't go to sleep without it."

"That makes sense." Bellamy's tone was devoid of emotion and Clarke felt a little awkward with how exposed she had been. 

"Yeah."

"Yeah."

Just then the nurse came in to check on Liv. Breaking up the awkward tension between the co-parents. She smiled and then went over to Liv to check vitals. Luckily their baby didn't even stir as the nurse took her forehead temp and took notes. When she was done with her exam she motioned for them to step outside to talk.

"Dr.Griffin, I just spoke with Dr. Masher and we think under your care Liv should be ready to go home around noon tomorrow. If you can't take her home then we can also release her into the custody of her father.”

”That won’t be necessary. I’m going to be taking Liv home.” 

”Oh I’m sorry I didn’t mean to assume.”

“No worries.”

With the important conversation out of the way, the nurse returned her attention to Bellamy. Rotating her body towards him and twirling her hair she spoke in a seductive tone.

”So Bellamy, I’d love to buy you a coffee sometime.”

Clarke resisted the urge to roll her eyes and instead just removed herself from the conversation. Bellamy followed behind her not long after.

”I know it’s soon but Octavia is also getting released tomorrow and she wants to schedule a time maybe on Saturday to come to meet Liv.”

”I just think it’s more than soon, it’s way too soon. Maybe next Saturday. Let’s just give her a week to heal and to adjust to having you around.”

”Ok, I understand that. That’s probably a good idea.”

”Thank you, Bellamy.”

”Of course. I want you to know that I’m trying not to overstep ever and I will respect you when it comes to parenting.”

”I really appreciate that and I want you to know that you have a voice too. You’re gonna be an amazing father and I believe that we can do this together.”

“I really think we can too.”

They slipped back into silence as Clarke resumed reading. The clock on the wall ticked loudly in Clarke’s ears as it got later and later. The conversation about sleeping arrangements loomed ominously in her mind.

”Hey Clarke?”

Bellamy’s voice startled her train of thoughts but she recovered quickly.

”Yeah?”

”I was thinking I could ask you about some questions about Liv and get a head start on knowing her.”

“That’s a good idea. What do you want to know?”

”Well everything really, but I guess my first question can be what is her favorite color?”

”Blue, but really she just loves color. One of her favorite things to do is painting and drawing is close behind that.”

”Ok does she like swimming?”

”She loves anything to do with water. Drinking water, baths, swimming, aquariums, and even movies. But you know that already with finding dory.”

Clarke finished talking and realized that Bellamy was taking notes on his phone and she couldn’t help but smile. His face was so concentrated and Clarke’s heart swelled with affection.

”Bellamy you are amazing.”

He looked up confused “Huh?”

”Because I should have known you would take this seriously.”

”Of course Clarke. I’ve only just started, to try and prove how much this means to me.”

”I can tell you are trying Bellamy, trust me everything you do means a lot.”

”I’m glad it shows.”

This time a comfortable silence fell over the pair for a few minutes. Finally working up the courage Clarke approached the topic of sleep.

”Its getting kind of late and I think I should go on to sleep.”

”Oh uh, well you should take the bed, I will just sleep on the floor.”

”No Bellamy, we are both adults. Besides it’s not like we haven’t done it before.”

He seemed surprised at her idea. “If you’re sure it’s alright with you?”

”It’s fine.”

”Ok. I’m pretty tired too so I’ll go ahead and go to sleep as well.”

”Alright.”

They both got up from their respective chairs and moved towards the cot. They stood on each side of the bed awkwardly watching to see who would move first.

Clarke broke the silence “Should we sleep opposite? Like one person lays one direction and the other does the reverse?”

”Um I don’t know if that’d be very comfortable.”

“Ok well just normal then.”

Despite her nerves, she went ahead and plopped down onto the bed in a sitting position. The bed dipped behind her and she moved to plug her phone into the wall before getting ready to lay down. Once again it was an uncomfortable standoff of who would lay down first. She thought about saying that it was a bad idea when Bellamy relented and laid down. If he could be strong so could she. Facing the edge of the bed she put her head on the pillow. Her back rested lightly against his and an attempt to not touch too much she let her self almost dangle off the bed. 

“Goodnight Clarke.”

”Night Bellamy.”

Taking a deep breath she tried to settle her heart and fall asleep. After about fifteen minutes she was still awake and uncomfortable. She wiggled in the most minimal way possible to try and ease the discomfort but no matter what she did nothing helped. Suddenly she heard Bellamy’s whisper.   
  


“Clarke? Are you awake?”

”Yeah.”

He was silent for a moment obviously arguing with himself on what to say or if he should. After what felt like a minute later he asked “Can I, uh... Can I change positions?”

The darkness of the room hid the blush that formed on her cheeks as she tried to control her tone.

”Of course.”

With a sigh of relief, he turned and faced her back. A brief second passed and she could feel him fumbling with where to put his arms. Ignoring her sense of better judgment she reached out and gently took a hold of his wrist and brought it around her. His arm tensed at first but relaxed almost immediately and responded by using the other arm to pull her against his chest completely.

The feeling of being that close to him once again took her breath away and she focused on steadying her racing heart. The desire to turn around and look at him was almost overpowering. 

If she gave into turning around there’s no telling what would happen. Scolding her childish emotions she settled into his warmth. Not even five minutes after she stopped her racing thoughts, sleep overtook.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry everyone my life has been crazy with moving and doctors and stuff. Top it all with writers block and it’s been way too long! Here’s to another chapter!

Bellamy awoke to the sun streaming in the hospital window. As he took in his surroundings he remembered the events of the last few days. Looking down, a familiar mess of blonde curls was splayed across his chest. Sometime in the night they’d changed positions and Bellamy was stretched out on his back and Clarke had her head on his chest, one arm slung across his middle and her legs entwined with his. Bellamy’s heart swelled with affection. It was the most comfortable he’d remembered being in, in a long time and it was something he wanted to wake up to for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, his bladder wasn’t quite so comfortable. Untangling his legs first he scooted out of the bed as gently as possible. Clarke stirred a bit but didn’t wake up. When he stood up he realized his leg was numb so he shook it a bit to try and get the blood flowing a bit.   
  


After using the restroom and changing Bellamy decided to go ahead and pack his stuff so he could try to be back before the girls even woke up. It was only about six so he sent Clarke a quick text explaining where he was if she was up before he got back. Taking one last look at their peaceful faces he slipped out the door. The paparazzi were completely swarming the front door so he threw on his hood and glasses and ran out the side. A couple of photographers were smarter and they ambushed him with questions as he rushed past them to get in his SUV. Their cameras flashed obsessively as he pulled out of the parking lot. At his house, his mom wasn't awake either so he just hurried to grab a black duffel and throw everything he needed in it for at least a few weeks. Not even twenty minutes later he was out the door again. Swinging by Starbucks he grabbed a cold brew for himself and a vanilla iced coffee for Clarke. The paparazzi noticed his car only moments after he pulled in and they came running. Bellamy threw the SUV in park and sprinted to beat them to the door. A few pictures were taken again but at least they would be a little blurry.

Once inside he slowed from a run to just a quick walk. Clarke was awake when he got back but Liv was still sleeping. Clarke’s eyes lit up at the coffee cup in his hand.

”It’s a vanilla iced coffee, I hope you still like those?”

"Yes, you remembered right. Thank you! I'm gonna need this coffee to get through today."

"Yeah, I definitely do too. Did you sleep alright last night?"

A blush rose on her cheeks before she tilted her face away from him. "Uh yeah, I slept alright, how about you?"

"I slept pretty great actually. Which is surprising considering how small the bed was. I guess it's still pretty natural to be next to you. "

“Maybe... So what do you want for breakfast?”

The subject change was abrupt but completely understood. He hadn’t even thought it through before letting the statement about being next to her slip past his defenses. Moving forward he made a mental note to watch how much he let slide.

” I’m not too hungry so I was only thinking a bagel or something. Would that be ok for you?”

”That’s perfect I can run and get us a couple real quick.”

”Are you sure? I can always go.”

”You got the coffee, I can get the bagels.”

”Ok.”

Satisfied with his response she tiptoed out the door. Bellamy sat down in the chair next to Liv’s bed and started making a list of the things he would need to buy for his house once everything got settled.

Clarke came back not even ten minutes later with two everything bagels in hand. They had just finished eating when Livia started stirring and then opened her eyes.

Bellamy’s heart flooded with joy at her sleepy little face trying to adjust to the bright sunlight. He gently placed his hand atop hers and spoke softly.

”Good morning sleepy head.”

At the sound of his voice, she opened her eyes fully and looked from him to Clarke and back.

”Morning Daddy. Hello Mommy.”

Clarke leaned past him to kiss the top of her head lovingly.

”Hello baby. Did you sleep good?”

”Mmhmm.”

”That’s good. Are you ready to go potty?”

Livia nodded and Clarke moved to gently lift her from the bed and take her to the bathroom. Once she was done Clarke got her situated in the bed again, but this time sitting up.

“You want some breakfast?”

Another nod and Clarke was out the door to let the nurses know. They must’ve had it close because when Clarke returned she had a brown hospital tray in her hands. The cover lifted to reveal scrambled eggs, toast, and fruit with milk on the side.

Bellamy unwrapped the fork and spoke up.

”This looks so yummy Liv.”

She smiled happily “Mhmm and these blueberries are my favorite!”

”Wow! That means you gotta eat it all gone then.”

”Ok, daddy. Do you want a blueberry?”

”Oh no, thank you. Daddy already ate his breakfast with mommy.”

Sending him a confused look she asked “What did you eat?”

“An everything bagel and coffee.”

”Hmm, ok I guess. That doesn’t sound very yummy. Are you sure you don’t want a blueberry?”

”I’m sure. Thank you, Liv.”

A few moments passed in silence as she enjoyed her breakfast. She was finishing her eggs when a nurse came in. This one was different than the flirty one the night before. The brunette last night had annoyed him, because he felt her attention should have been on Liv alone. He only hoped that this nurse would be better.   
  
“Good morning, Dr. Griffin knows this but I’m nurse Rachel. I’ll be taking care of Livia here until she’s ready to go home. Which actually should be in a few hours because we’ve already started the release forms. Dr. Griffin just checking to be sure, you will be the one taking her home? ” 

  
“Yes. Dr.Masher thinks it’s best I still keep a close eye on her. She’s not ready to be out of medical supervision but because I’m a surgeon they are allowing her to come home under my care.”

”Ok perfect! I’ll be seeing you in about an hour to check-in.”

”Thanks, Rachel.”

”Of course Doctor.”

With a smile and a glance at Bellamy, the nurse was out the door leaving them alone. 

Clarke’s smile warmed as she got closer to her baby.

”Did you hear that? You are going home soon!”

Liv’s face lit up with excitement.

”Now?”

Bellamy chuckled a bit at her desire to do everything quickly. “Not just yet but in a little bit. We have just enough time to watch the Barbie island princess movie and then it will be time to go.”

”Ok, can you put it on daddy?”

”Absolutely.”

Bellamy connected his laptop to the tv and pulled up the movie in question before pressing play. While Liv was glued to the tv he and Clarke tidied everything up and packed to go home. As the movie ended Clarke helped Liv out of her hospital gown and into some space explorer pajamas. Clarke had changed into a simple white v-neck and ripped black jeans during the movie and the neckline wasn’t doing well for Bellamy’s concentration. He shook himself as he called his security to come escort Clarke and Liv. Rachel came in just as they were finishing packing Livia’s toys.

”Alrighty, her release forms have all been signed and you are clear to go home. I’m here to escort you out per hospital policy. I’ll grab the wheelchair and then we will be ready to go.”

Clarke smiled as Rachel left and she turned to Bellamy “Ok so you are gonna go out the front for the distraction and then we are gonna go out the back with security.” 

“That’s the plan, my guys are right outside waiting for instructions.”

”Ok I’ll see you in a bit.”

Suddenly Liv spoke up as Bellamy headed to the door. “Daddy! Where are you going?”

He quickly spun on his heel to answer her question. “I’m just going out the front door while you and mommy go out the back. I promise I will see you at the house.”

Liv’s little face grew red as tears started to slip down her cheeks. Her voice raised with emotion. “NO DADDY! Don’t leave!”

The two parents both rushed to her bedside to help explain. Clarke spoke up first.

”Baby, Daddy is gonna be right back it will only be a few minutes.”

Liv’s voice only escalated and tears poured down her face and onto her neck. ”NO PLEASE DADDY DON’T GO!”

Clarke looked at him quickly. “She won’t calm down when she gets like this. It’ll take too long to explain. Just come with us and we will figure something else out.”

Thinking quickly and an idea formed in his head. First, they had to soothe Liv. 

  
“Ok baby I’m not leaving. I’m gonna stay right here.”

Liv hiccuped a bit as she processed what he’d said “ You promise?”

”I promise.”

Liv’s tears trickled off and Clarke grabbed a napkin to dry her face. 

Bellamy stood close by as he pulled out his phone to call his security.

Rachel came in just as he was finishing the call. 

“Ok, I got the wheelchair are you guys ready?”

Clarke’s concerned gaze snapped to Bellamy. Who responded to her as if she’d called his name. 

”It’s all worked out Clarke. One of my security is gonna pretend to be me and stand in the middle of the rest. It’s a trick we’ve pulled before and the paparazzi will at least be distracted enough for us to slip out. They will go to my car and then take it to my apartment where it will stay. At your house, we can pull directly into the garage and close it. No one will ever know I’m there.”

”Ok. I’ll carry Liv to the wheelchair and you take the stuff.” 

Bellamy nodded as he went about grabbing all the bags. With Liv settled in her chair. Clarke instructed Rachel to go to the back. As they moved through the hospital people turned and stared and Bellamy could see Clarke wanting to cover her face. They couldn’t have gotten to the door soon enough. Clarke picked up Liv once again and carried her to the car quickly. Bellamy jumped in the driver's seat while Clarke stayed in the back with Liv. Luckily it seemed that Bellamy’s paparazzi distraction had worked as they pulled from the parking lot.   
  


Clarke directed him on the turns to take to get to the house. Before too long they pulled up to a cute little grey house with a blue door. Once they were in the garage and the door was closed Bellamy helped Clarke out and then he picked up Liv from the car seat as she had requested. Clarke opened the door to their quaint little house. It was completely Clarke not to have a massive house even when she could afford it. The inside was nice but not lavish. The style was very modern but warm with neutral colors. He passed through the living room and down the hall. To the right, he noticed a door was cracked and there was pink inside. Pushing it open further he took Liv to her bed. The pink he noticed was a Barbie dollhouse complete with furniture and everything.   
  


Covering Liv up he stood up again. Grabbing a few dolls and books he set them on the bed.  
  


“Alrighty Liv I’m gonna go help mommy for a minute and then I’ll be back. Just play a little with some dolls or look at some books and daddy will read you one when I come back.”

”Oh ok.”

Bellamy smiled before going out to check on Clarke. He found her throwing in a load of laundry. He couldn’t help but watch a bit from the door frame. It was so domestic that his heart melted at the sight.

She turned around and jumped a little in surprise.

”Bellamy! You scared me, standing there in silence like a creeper.”

He laughed a bit before responding “Sorry, I wasn’t really thinking about that.”

She brushed past him with an empty laundry basket and filled it with the throw blankets strewn about the living room.

”Did you need to ask me something or do you make it a habit of loitering in the laundry room?”

”Oh, I just wanted to see what I could do to help you.”

Without looking at him as she continued to straighten up she answered “I don’t think so, I’m gonna finish these last little things and then make lunch. Why don’t you play with Liv until then and while she’s taking a nap I can show you the room and you can get unpacked?”

”Ok, Are you sure you don’t need help with lunch? Because I can cook too.” He watched her as she busied about the room, he almost got dizzy from watching her.

”No thanks, I’m just gonna make something easy and besides someone needs to make sure Liv is overexerting herself.”

”Alright we’ll yell if you need anything.”

”Thanks!”

Bellamy backed away from the cleaning storm that was Clarke Griffin and made his way back into Liv’s room. She brightened immediately as he entered and held out a stack of books she’d picked.   
  
Smiling to himself, Liv had taken something from him after all. They read for a while until she got bored and then they played with miscellaneous toys. Not too long after Clarke came in with a tray of food for Liv. On it was some sautéed chicken and sweet potatoes.   
  


Liv ate her food happily in between her two parents. Bellamy took the tray when she was done and Clarke laid with her for a bit until Liv had fallen asleep. 

Back out in the kitchen Bellamy made him and Clarke each a plate and sat it on the table. Her food got a little cold while she was putting Liv to sleep so he stuck it in the microwave while he put away the leftovers and cleaned the kitchen.

When Clarke emerged he warmed up the food and set it down in front of her.

”Thanks, Bellamy.”

”Of course. I went ahead and cleaned up the kitchen too. It looks like we might need some groceries soon so I can have some delivered later tonight.”

She looked up at him a bit surprised “Oh well I normally go grocery shopping on Thursday but since we are gonna be home we might as well. It’s only one day early anyway.”

With her confirmation, he sat down beside her and they scrolled through his phone putting together a grocery list for the week. After they finished with the main groceries Bellamy stood up out of her eyesight and added tulips to the list. 

Clarke finished eating right around the time they finished with the order and she put away her dish and then led him to the guest room. It was a simple grey and white queen bed with a matching dresser and two nightstands each with stainless lamps on top.

”It’s not much in here since no one really uses it that often but you can put stuff in the closet or the dresser. Let me know if you need anything at all.”

Bellamy opened the closet and in the corner was a pile of art supplies.   
  


“Why is this all tucked in here? Do you still like to paint?”

Clarke shuffled awkwardly in the doorframe. “I actually haven’t painted in like four years. Just haven’t had the time or energy I guess.”

Bellamy’s heart dropped “ That’s sad to hear, maybe since I’m gonna be helping with Ella you will be able to find the time.”

”Maybe. Anyways, I’m gonna let you unpack and I’ll just be in my room if Liv needs me.”

”Ok thanks.”

With a half-smile she disappeared from the doorway, leaving Bellamy to his own thoughts and memories.

**5 YEARS AGO ***  
**

Bellamy came home from a show to an empty house and a note from Clarke.   
  
Knowing immediately where she’d gone, he threw his jacket on and went straight back out the door. 

His tires crunched on the dirt road as he drove up to the edge of the lake.   
  
The sun was setting and cast an orange glow over the landscape. Clarke had an easel set up a few feet away from the edge and she was painting the entire scene. Coming up behind her he nuzzled his face against her neck and wrapped his arms around her midsection.

”Hello love.”

Rotating in his arms she reached up and kissed him. The day’s tension seemed to melt away as they just stood together.   
  
Before too long she had pulled away and returned to her painting. They talked for a little while about their day and lasted into silence in spots just enjoying the outdoors. The sun had gone down a while ago and the only light was from Bellamy’s truck and her easel light.

”Babe I think it’s getting pretty late we should probably head in.”

Clarke let a whine “No, I’m not ready yet.”

He couldn’t help but laugh at her tone. “You will never be ready.”

”Not true.”

”Mmhmm it is true. You have at least five hours left on that painting and it’s almost ten o’clock already.”

”Just a little longer Bell.“

”Hmm, I don’t think so.” As he finished his sentence he dabbed a bit of paint on his finger and then tapped her nose. That got her attention as she gasped. The next thing he knew paint was being flung back and forth as he chased her and she chased him. Fully covered in paint, they ran hand in hand off the dock and into the cool water.  
  


Her blonde hair was pink and blue from all the paint and they took turns helping each other rinse off the majority of the mess. The laughter had soon died down and Bellamy pulled her close and kissed her. After a few seconds, he felt goosebumps on her cold arms and led her out of the lake. Back home they finished their kiss but this time in the hot shower water as the day and paint was rinsed off. It was one of the best days of Bellamy’s life and it was one he looked back on often when he was feeling down.

**PRESENT****  
**

He finished unpacking and then ventured into the living room to look around. The tv stand had cubby holes filled with bins in the bins was an assortment of toys and coloring books. To the right was a white wooden bookshelf The bottom shelves were filled with children’s books and the top was filled with various books on art, science, and a few fictions. As he turned to leave an old brown spine caught his attention. Pulling it from its place he held it in his hands. It was a copy of one of his favorite historical novels. When he opened the cover Clarke’s familiar handwriting stood out against the yellowing paper.

“Bellamy, I love you more than you know. Think of me every time you read this and knowing you, that will be often.”

The message was signed with “Love Clarke” and a heart.   
  


He couldn’t believe she had this book, let alone had kept it all this time. Letting out a sigh he plopped down on the couch and started to read.


	14. Chapter 14

Clarke took advantage of Liv’s nap time to clean her bedroom and bathroom. It also happened to be a great way to decompress from her racing thoughts. Time seemed to pass too quickly and before she knew it muffled cries were coming through the wall.   
  


She pushed the door open to reveal Liv sitting up sleepily whining. Speaking gently Clarke walked over and gathered her baby into her arms.   
  


As she walked into the living room her heart swelled in her chest. Bellamy had changed into some pajama shorts and a black t-shirt and was silently reading the book she’d gotten for him all those years ago. The familiarity and comfort she felt was almost too much. Concern crept up in her mind like a spider moves from behind a painting.   
  


She had to be careful to watch that she didn't let herself get attached. He was only here for Liv and nothing else. Sure he hadn’t wanted to leave her back then but he could’ve reached out after the threat had passed. No, she had to realize he moved on and she had too. 

Liv whined a bit in her arms and his gaze snapped up to see them standing there. 

Not wanting to look silly Clarke walked over to where he was on the couch.   
  
”Look who woke up.”

Bellamy’s smile lit up the room as he ran his hand over Liv’s little back.   
  
“Hi, baby.”

Her eyelids fluttered open at his voice and she lifted her head from Clarke’s shoulder. She just watched the two of them for a moment in silence and then leaned over onto Bellamy’s chest. Feet still wrapped around Clarke’s waist she acted as an anchor tying the two closely together.   
  


“Well, I guess I’ll just keep reading for a bit.”

A few seconds passed before Clarke spoke up timidly. 

”Uh Bellamy, do you mind reading out loud?”

Without hesitating, he answered his agreement softly before starting to read out loud. Clarke allowed herself just this moment to relax and the sound of his voice and the warmth from where his shoulder rested against hers.   
  


Liv woke up fully about fifteen minutes later so Clarke decided to work with her a bit on numbers and small words. Bellamy caught on to the routine quickly and was soon holding up various items to show to Liv and ask her what it was called. They worked with her for a couple hours before Clarke left to start dinner and Bellamy switched gears to playing with the toy kitchen. The groceries were delivered while Clarke was cooking so Bellamy answered the door and grabbed them from the courier. Once the groceries were put away he went back to playing with Liv.

Clarke made grilled shrimp, vegetables, and brown rice for dinner and set the table. She yelled through the house that dinner was ready and Bellamy came in carrying Liv and he put her in the high chair before taking his seat on Liv’s left.

Liv ate her food happily and Bellamy smiled.

”She’s such a great eater Clarke, I’m really impressed that you are able to get her to eat so well.”

”Thanks Bellamy, she’s actually always been a pretty good eater and I just try to make her a well rounded and healthy diet.”

”This shrimp is amazing too by the way. Thanks for cooking. Tomorrow I can make dinner.”

”Well you don’t have to, I really don’t mind cooking.”

”I know I don’t have to but I want to be as helpful as possible.”

Clarke chose not to respond again and instead turned her attention back to eating and Liv. Dinner was finished so Clarke took Liv to do a sponge bath because she couldn’t have a full bath until her incisions had completely healed. After the bath, she brushed and flossed her teeth and helped her into a new set of pajamas.

By the time they came back out Bellamy had finished cleaning the kitchen and was waiting for them on the couch. He’d found a kids animated documentary of Ancient Rome for them to watch and Liv seemed completely engrossed in it the entire movie. After it was over Bellamy carried Liv to bed where the two parents tucked her in and told her goodnight.   
  


Clarke closed the door behind them quietly and motioned for Bellamy to follow her to the couch. Once they were seated Clarke spoke up.

”So I think we should go over some of the basics regarding Livia.”

Bellamy straightened into a sitting position, giving Clarke his full attention.

”That’s probably a good idea.”

”Great! So her schedule has been Sunday - Tuesday from 7 am to 9 pm she comes with me to the hospital and hangs out in the nursery I check on her as often as possible and eat with her as well as tuck her in. During my shift on Wednesday Murphy comes and picks her up and she spends the night with him and Emori until I get off on Thursday at 1 in the afternoon. So obviously we will want to tweak it with you being in her life. I need to know how much you want to take on.”

Bellamy sat silently deep in thought for a few minutes before he responded.

”Well I want to be with her as much as possible. What about Sunday and Monday Liv stays the whole day with me. On Tuesday and Wednesday I’ll bring her down to the hospital for lunch and we will do something around town on Wednesday until dinner and we will come back to eat with you. On Thursday after you get off, Friday and Saturday she can be with you.”

Clarke felt her heart sink and the desire to protect her time with Liv filled her vision.

”No way! Look I’m glad you want to be involved, but Livia has been my life for four years. Ever since I found out I was pregnant with her I make every decision with her in mind. I’m not gonna be away from her that much.”

”Well it’s too much back and forth with your work schedule and I don’t want her wasting time in a nursery when she can be with me.”

”So what do you propose?”

”I guess the only way we both get time is if we are together.”

Clarke’s eyes grew wide as saucers. Coughing a bit on her own saliva. Bellamy realized what it sounded like and quickly corrected it.

“I mean like I think we should live together. Platonically of course as Co-parents.”

”Bellamy I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

” Why not Clarke? We are both adults and it’s really the best option.”

Clarke stumbled over her thoughts. “I.. I..I don’t know. Maybe you’re right, but where would we live? Would you move in here?”

”You and Liv would move in with me, I know you probably wouldn’t want to but Liv is gonna need security once the world finds out that she’s my daughter. Not to mention you will need security as well at least until the media storm blows over. My building has state of the art security as well as our apartment. It’s only like 10 minutes from the hospital too.”

”An apartment? I want her to have room to play. I mean how big is it?”

”It’s the penthouse so like four thousand square feet.”

Clarke gasped ”FOUR THOUSAND SQUARE FEET?? Why in the world do you have such a big place?”

”Well my manager bought it for me I told him to just pick a place. I had no idea what he’d choose. It’s actually come in handy though because the band likes to crash there sometimes and Octavia comes in and out. It’s got three master suites and three regular bedrooms. The living area is open concept and it flows into the kitchen and dining room. There’s also a gym, pool, theater room, office, art room and music studio.”

”Ok so there’s plenty for Liv to do. Since we are talking about moving in there are some rules we need to agree on first.”

”Sounds reasonable.”

”First, no cursing around Liv, she repeats everything she hears. Second no drinking when you’re the one watching her. Accidents happen in a second and you need to be able to give one hundred percent attention. Thirdly no scary movies while she’s awake, if she even sees a horror commercial we will be up all night with her refusing to sleep. And lastly, no one night stands or flings around Liv, you can go out or I can take Liv somewhere for the night. If there is someone serious I’d prefer you to run it by me first and I’ll do the same for you.”

”Ok I think those are all pretty realistic.”

”Oh and no crazy amounts of sugar. It’s fine to have sweets now and then but not like bowls of ice cream every day.”

“Of course. I have a chef who does meal prep for my lunches and what not so we can give him the specifics of her diet.”

”Alright. I guess it’s settled then. When do you think we should move?”

Bellamy’s serious face lifted into a smile and it was obvious he was very pleased with the new arrangement. 

“ As soon as possible, probably Saturday.”

“That’s impossible, we couldn’t get all this packed and sold by Saturday.”

Bellamy shot her a sarcastic look.

”No “we” can’t but I don’t want you to worry about moving and all that. I’ll have a coordinator come over tomorrow and go over what you want to bring to the apartment and what you want to sell or donate. You just pack a small bag for you and Liv for a few days and by Sunday I’ll have the movers have everything transferred and unpacked.”

”Bellamy you don’t need to do all that.”

”Clarke, let me just take care of things in this instance. I know you can do it but your focus needs to be on Liv and besides it more secure for you guys not to be seen going in and out yet.”

“I guess you are right.” 

”Thank you.”

He leaned back on the couch for less than a minute before sitting back up abruptly. “Oh I almost forgot, my mom is there right now because she came down for O, do you want me to ask her to leave?”

”No that’s fine just as long as it’s just your mom.”

”Ok I’ll make sure she stays low key but she’s gonna be so excited. You wouldn’t believe how much she’s already been asking about her.”

Clarke couldn’t help but smile, she’d always loved Aurora’s kind heart and she was grateful that Liv would actually have a grandma who loved her. With the important conversation out of the way, Clarke excused herself to go and start packing a little bag for herself as well as thinking about what she would want to sell or give away.   
  


She called Raven first to give an update on the whole situation and as always she was completely supportive and made sure Clarke knew that if anything happened that she’d be there whenever she needed her.   
  


Next, she called Murphy which was an hour and a half of lecturing her about letting Bellamy back into her life again and another thirty minutes of asking every little thing about Liv.

Finally, she called Wells who was straight to the point but positive and kind. They had all been so worried about Liv and while she’s been on the phone for close to three hours Clarke was glad that Liv was so cared about. 

Before she knew it, the clock showed one in the morning and she hurried to finish up her bag and climb into bed.

**TWO YEARS AGO***  
**

Clarke had just finished cleaning the kitchen from lunch and Liv was sitting on the living room floor where Clarke could see her with some of her toys. 

Craving a bit of chocolate Clarke pulled a fudge cycle from the freezer and walked over the couch.   
  


The crackling of the package being opened caught Liv’s attention immediately. Putting down her toy Liv pulled herself up on the chair and then let go walking a few steps to Clarke.

”Liv! You’re walking! Oh my gosh! You’re amazing! This is amazing!”

Clarke gave her a bite of fudge cycle before scooting a few feet away and calling her over. Clarke’s face shone with glee at watching Liv take her first steps.  
  


Again and again, Liv would toddle over for a little chocolate. Clarke was over the moon excited and proud. After the chocolate bar was gone she picked her up and held Liv close to her chest.   
  


“I’m so proud of you baby we gotta tell...”

Suddenly Bellamy’s face came to her mind and she tried her best not to let her excitement dim. Plastering on a smile she called Murphy and Raven and their excitement helped to ease the sting.   
  


It wasn’t until that night after Liv had gone to bed that Clarke allowed herself to cry and feel the sorrow that Bellamy was missing her first steps and many more milestones. Calling his number again she listened to the robotic voice on the other end telling her the number had been disconnected. She calmed her sobs until they became a quiet sniffle lulling her to sleep.

*******PRESENT********

Clarke alarm jolted her from her sleep and it took her a moment to remember where she was. She hated when she dreamt of painful memories like that, it always seemed to offset her day a bit.

Shaking it off the best she could she washed her face in cold water and slipped on some black denim shorts and a teal blue shirt. Remembering the coordinator was almost coming today she applied some makeup so she didn’t look too horrible.   
  


The smell of bacon wafted through the house tracing back to the kitchen where Bellamy was making breakfast and Liv was already in her high chair eating oatmeal with fruit and some bacon.

He turned around to see her walk up and smiled brightly. “Good Morning Clarke, do you want some coffee?”

“Mmm yes, please. Thank you.”

With a nod, he turned his attention to the espresso machine and Clarke turned to kiss Liv on her cheeks.

”Good Morning baby girl. Did you sleep ok?”

Liv mumbled an “mhmm” as she stuffed another blueberry into her mouth.

After breakfast, the coordinator arrived and she and Clarke went through everything. By lunch, they were almost finished so Clarke decided for them to go ahead and load the car with the bags for the next few days. Clarke hated wasting any time on anything so since she’d decided to move in with Bellamy she wanted to just get it over with and get settled in as soon as possible. The car was loaded with their bags quickly and then Bellamy carried Liv to the car and carefully buckled her in. Giving one last look at the house Clarke climbed into the driver's seat and pulled away.

Bellamy’s security met them at the gate to the apartment building and made sure no one was around for them to get inside their private entrance and elevator. Liv wanted Bellamy to carry her so she was currently tucked against his chest. The security insisted on taking the bags and Clarke couldn’t complain at not having to do any heavy lifting.   
  
The elevator let them out at another hall with a security camera leading to the front door which had multiple locks. The apartment door opened to reveal modern neutrals and warm tones in a beautifully decorated living space. The kitchen and dining area was to the left while the living room was straight ahead. The whole living room wall was made of glass and the views of the city at night were breathtaking. There was another security system to her right and it led down a hall. Bellamy wasn’t kidding when he said his apartment had more security, Clarke was glad that she could leave Liv knowing she’d be safe and no one would be able to get close to harming her.

Clarke couldn’t explore the house more as Aurora came all but bounding around the corner. Realizing she needed to be calm Aurora took a deep breath settling herself. The sheer joy on her face made Clarke want to cry. She’d only seen a look like that during her rotation in the maternity ward. Grandparents always seemed to light up like Christmas trees when they saw their grandchild.   
  


At that moment Clarke knew already that Aurora would love Liv, she saw the mother’s heart shining through.   
  


Bellamy spoke gently to Liv in her ear causing her to glance outward.

”Liv this is your grandma.”

Tears started to fill Aurora’s eyes as she took in Liv’s sleepy appearance. 

“Hi there Liv, I’m your Grammy. I’m so excited to meet you. Daddy has told me so much about you already.”

Liv hid her face in Bellamy’s chest and looked out from the corner of her eye. Aurora stepped to the side and before Clarke knew it she was caught up in her embrace. Warmth seeped through her hardened exterior as she hugged her back. She felt her own tears drip down her chin as she let herself enjoy a mother’s hug for the first time in years. When Aurora pulled back she gently wiped Clarke’s face.

”You’re just as beautiful as ever Clarke. I’m so happy that you are back in our lives, and I want to thank you for giving my son another chance. I know as a mom it must be very hard but I can assure you I’m gonna be there for you no matter what and I know Bellamy will be too.”

”Thank you Aurora.”

Bellamy cleared his throat a bit and spoke up. “Um let me show you to your rooms. Before we eat dinner.”

”Ok. That sounds good.”

He guided them to the right where they passed the music studio, a bathroom, and the gym. At the end of the hall were three doors the first one he opened was Liv’s room.

”Liv honey, look at your new room.”

She peeked her head up again to gasp at her room. It had been painted blue with color reefs on the bottom. The characters from finding Dory were scattered about the room in various forms such as stuffed animals, squeaky toys, and action figure types. One wall housed a rather large fish tank that was built in and managed from the room behind it, which Clarke remembered Bellamy pointed out as a storage room. The bright-colored fish glowed underneath the fluorescent lights. The room was completed with sand-colored furniture and a flat-screen tv mounted on one wall. 

Clarke expected Bellamy to do a few little things but she was astounded at what he’d designed.   
  


Liv climbed down Bellamy to explore her new toys and Clarke leaned in to talk Bellamy.

”How did you even do all this Bellamy? This is incredible!”

”Well on Tuesday when you told me what she liked and I saw her I knew I’d never let her be out of my life again and I got to thinking that she’d need a room at my house so I called a few contractors and hired a project manager and boom. They actually finished it yesterday so it’s perfect timing really. My mom has been also collecting things she’d thought Liv would need besides the room.”

”Well this really is incredible. You’re gonna spoil her rotten if we aren’t careful.”

Bellamy let out a noncommittal noise. “Nah I just wanted it to be perfect for her to get her. I won’t do anything too extravagant on a daily basis.”

Clarke let out a laugh “I’ll believe it when I see it, Mr. Blake.”

”No I promise, in any case, let me show you your room.”

With a nod of agreement, he went back out into the hall. Pointing at the door to the right he said “that’s my room if you ever need me and your room is right next to that. I didn’t want Liv on the other side of the house because it is too far and I’d be concerned with her walking through the living room at night, and obviously I knew you’d want to be close to her so I hope this is ok. I can move rooms if you want.”

He stood awkwardly shifting from one foot to the other waiting for her response.

”Bellamy this is great really, thank you for thinking it all through so well.”

Perking up around her acceptance he smiled “Of course, I’ll let you put your stuff in your room and I’ll grab Liv and meet you out in the dining room. Uh, you saw it when we came in, right?”

”Yeah I’ll meet you there in just a sec, let me just toss these into the room.”

Clarke’s room was elegant and beautiful. Everything about it was clean and modern. The door to the bathroom was cracked and Clarke couldn’t help but take a peek. The bathroom was white with granite countertops, a massive jet tub, and a walk-in glass shower. Making a mental note to leave time for a bath tonight she slipped out the door and to the dining room.

Aurora had already set the table and Liv was seated in a modern grey high chair. Taking a seat next to Liv Clarke spoke up

”This chicken looks amazing Aurora, thank you for cooking tonight.”

She waved it off with a smile “Anytime, I’m just so excited to be eating my first meal with my grandbaby. I hope she likes it.”

”I’m sure she will.”  
  
“So Clarke do you like working at the hospital?”

”It can be challenging at times but I love being able to help people get well. Bellamy told me you went through a health battle of your own, how are you doing now?”

Aurora looked surprised but hid it quickly as she sent Bellamy an approving glance.

”I’m doing much better dear, you know us, Blakes. We’re fighters. I wasn’t ready to leave my kids behind.”

”That’s good to hear, let me know if you ever feel unwell I’d be more than happy to check you over. The most important thing with health is daily care and routine exams.”

”Thank you, Clarke, I really do appreciate it.” 

”Of course.”

”So when Bellamy told me about Livia I started getting things in that she might need. I got the high chair and dishes obviously as well as some sippy cups and learning cups. I also had a safety net installed around the pool and the doors leading out are all child locked. Let me or Bellamy know if you or Livia need anything that we missed.”

”You both have already done so much for us. I’m sure I can get anything else we might need.”

”Pish posh I love it. Going out and buying these little things has been the highlight of my year.”

”Ok well I don’t want to put you at an imposition in any way.”

”It’s no imposition at all. Trust me on this.”

”Alright well thank you, I’m really grateful for everything.”

Aurora smiled and turned her attention to Liv who started waving a green bean. Dinner went by seamlessly and Clarke cleaned the kitchen and put her things away while Aurora and Bellamy played with Liv in her new room. When she was finished unpacking she joined them in playing for a bit before they tucked her in and took turns kissing her goodnight.

Clarke said goodnight and went into her room but not before overhearing Aurora whisper to Bellamy “She sings your song! What do you think that means?”

Bellamy returned with a shh before talking too lowly for Clarke to understand. Closing the door Clarke headed straight for the tub and poured in some lavender bath salts before relaxing with a book. 

When the water grew cold she dried and slipped into a set of silk pale pink pajamas and then peeled back the covers to crawl underneath. Within just a few moments sleep had completely overridden her senses.


	15. Chapter 15

Bellamy was on a high after spending an entire weekend with Clarke, his mom and Livia. It didn’t help that Aurora kept asking him about Clarke, and it her comment about the song kept replaying in his head. Now it was Monday and Clarke was going back to work and Aurora had left yesterday to go back home.   
  


Clarke left him with instructions last night for Liv and he tried his best not to let his nerves get the best of him.

His alarm clock blared beside him and he woke up right out of bed.

A cry was coupled with the alarm and he all but ran to Liv’s room out of nerves. She was sitting up in bed crying.

He tried to pick her up but she just pushed his hands and continued to cry. Then he asked if she wanted food or water. That didn’t work either. He started to fret a bit and asked if anything hurt. Nothing was working no toys or anything. Nervously he called Clarke.

”Hello?”

”Clarke, Liv woke up and she’s crying and nothing is working, what am I supposed to do? Is she hurting? Did I do something wrong?”

Clarke’s laugh rolled through the phone, and Bellamy was instantly more confused.

”What?”

”Sorry I forgot to tell you if she wakes up this early. She just needs to go to the potty. Pick her up and take her in there. Also her pain medicine is still in her system so she’s not hurting. Just follow the schedule on the counter.”

Immediately he did as instructed. Liv went potty as soon as he has sat her down. The tears came to a dim.

”Ok, now what?”

“Take her back to bed.”

Once she was back in bed she laid right down and cuddled her toy before falling straight to sleep.

”She’s asleep.”

Another chuckle came through the phone. “See no big deal Bellamy, just calm down. You’re a great dad and you will do great with her today. I’m here if you need anything.”

”Ok thanks. I’ll let you get back to work.”

”Alright see you when I get home. I lo.. uh bye.”

The phone clicked and Bellamy wondered if she almost said what it sounded like. This whole situation was messing with his heart way more than he was expecting. He knew he loved Clarke, but he thought he could handle trying to move on since she didn’t feel the same, but what if she did? If there was even a chance they could be a family Bellamy wanted to pursue it. The question was would she ever feel the same way about him again?

The house was completely silent so he peeked in on Liv just to confirm she was still asleep and decided to work out for a bit.   
  


After finishing his routine, he took one of the fastest showers just in case he couldn’t hear Liv and then moved on to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee and breakfast.   
  


He was just pulling the banana nut muffins out of the oven when the pitter patter of little feet entered the kitchen.

She had her stuffed Dory under one arm and reached for him with the other. He all too happily bent down and scooped her up letting her rest against his chest.

”Good morning baby, I just got made some muffins and bacon. Are you hungry?”

She nodded against his chest and so he transferred her into her high chair and cut a muffin into fourths, setting it on her plate with a couple pieces of bacon.

Livia munched happily in silence and Bellamy drank his coffee and ate a few boiled eggs. After breakfast Bellamy let her watch a little tv while he cleaned. After he was done cleaning he started to work with Liv on the number books Clarke had laid out. Since she was still recovering from the surgery Bellamy had to keep her confined to the couch or the table. For lunch he made grilled chicken cesear salad for him and gave her grilled chicken with fruit and quinoa.   
  


After lunch Liv took a nap and he answered some emails from his laptop beside her. She woke up after about an hour and they played together with some play doh. For dinner Bellamy ordered in sushi and hibachi and gave Liv a sponge bath before tucking her in just like he and Clarke had done together the past few days.   
  


Bellamy had just changed into some pajama pants and walked back into the living room when Clarke got home. She seemed a bit startled to see him at first before shaking it off and taking off her shoes.  
  


“How’d Liv do today? I missed her so much.”

”Well aside from my momentary panic this morning, it was great. Why don’t you go change and I’ll warm up your dinner and then I’ll tell you all about it?”

A sweet smile crossed her face before she replied “That sounds great, thank you.”

With that she disappeared into her room and Bellamy got up from the couch to do as he had said. He brought her food and placed it on the coffee table along with water and silverware. When she came back out she was wearing shorts and a low cut tank top and it was Bellamy’s turn to try not to stare. She smirked at his reaction before coming to sit next to him on the couch.

Clarke ate while he told her the details of the day and when she was done eating he put on a documentary while she washed her few dishes.

Instead of going to bed she sat down next to him.   
  


It seemed that this had become their nighttime routine since they had brought Liv home. Tonight however Bellamy wasn’t satisfied sitting shoulder to shoulder and brushing thighs here and there. He lifted his arm and put it behind Clarke on the top of the couch. She stiffened before giving in and settling against his side.   
  


His heart skipped a beat in excitement at her returned gesture. In that moment he was sure they’d be together again, and settled in for the journey ahead.   
  


Clarke had fallen asleep against his chest not long after finishing dinner and he allowed himself to enjoy the intimacy of their position before picking her up and carrying her to her room. Before he could leave she muffled a cry in her sleep.

”Please don’t leave me again.”

A pain shot through his heart, and he turned around and put a hand on her arm gently waking her.

Her eyes adjusted blinking sleepily.   
  


“Bellamy?”

”Yes, I’m sorry it seemed like you were having a bad dream. Go back to sleep.”

She nodded, before closing her eyes. Again he turned to leave but this time she spoke up.

”Can you stay?”

There wasn’t a single moment of hesitation in his agreement. He didn’t want to leave her in any way. He had already planned on not being able to sleep tonight.

He climbed into bed beside her and she curled into his chest. Not even a minute later she had fallen back asleep. She probably would regret this in the morning but he couldn’t find it in himself to care as he closed his eyes and joined her in a deep sleep.

The next morning he heard her alarm and felt her slide out of bed before going to the bathroom, getting dressed, and slipping out the door.   
  


His own alarm didn’t go off for another hour and he got up to repeat the process of the day before. 

Octavia called him during breakfast and he answered it through his Apple Watch.

”Good morning O, how are you feeling?”

”I’d be better if I could come see my niece.”

”I know, we just wanted Livia to be settled before we introduce her to a bunch of people.”

”I get that, but I’m not a bunch of people. It’d just be me and Lincoln that’s it.”

”Alright O let me ask Clarke and see if she’s alright with you coming over Thursday night.”

”That’s fine, but I know she will be. Besides I can convince her if she’s not just let me know what I need to do.”

Laughing at his sister’s persistence he changed the subject.

”Alright now, are you taking care of yourself? Is Lincoln helping you?”

Her eyeroll could almost be heard through the phone. ”Yes I’m fine. Eating, drinking, sleeping and resting you worry wart. Now just focus on getting that approval. I’ll see you Thursday.”

“Ok, I love you.”

”Love you too.”

Bellamy hung up the phone and turned around to see that Livia had smashed her blueberries all over the tray and had them in her hair and on her face and hands.

”Oh no! What a mess you silly goose. Now we’re gonna have to find mr.squeaky the washcloth.”

Liv giggled and Bellamy’s silly tone and he turned cleanup time into a little game. After Liv was clean he let her color while he finished cleaning everything else and putting away the leftovers.   
  


After sending Clarke a text about Thursday he sat down to do some Montessori exercises with Liv.

She really was such a smart little girl already, he could tell that she was just gonna be as smart as her mommy. Clarke texted back with her approval and Bellamy let Octavia know who replied with confetti and balloon texts in rapid succession.

The rest of the day went by uneventfully and Bellamy got more nervous as it got closer to the time Clarke would be home. He only hoped that she wouldn’t be awkward about the night before or worse mad about it. He tried not to let it worry him too much but after he put Liv to bed he was trying his hardest not to stare at the door. Just as he had finished some emails, the lady in question came home.

”Hey Bellamy.”

”Oh hey Clarke.”

She seemed normal as she slipped off her shoes and padded to the kitchen to warm up her food. While it was in the microwave she went and changed before ducking in to see Liv and then coming back to take her place on the couch.   
  


“How did Liv do today?”

”Great, really. She had fun at breakfast putting mashed blueberries in her hair though so that was interesting.”

”I bet. How are you doing with taking care of her by yourself?”

”It’s nerve wracking honestly but I love every second of it. It’s just so crazy to me that’s she’s here and that she’s our daughter, you know?”

”Yeah that’s how I felt when I first had her, it was like every little breath I would jump to see if she needed anything. After awhile though it just becomes a habit and you know when they need you or when they are just moody.”

Leaning back on the couch Bellamy thought about that for a bit. It was just crazy that this was the rest of his life. That this wonderful thing wasn’t going away.

”I can’t wait until I know her like that too.”

Clarke smiled “It’ll be faster than you realize. One day you’ll just be doing something with muscle memory and it’ll just hit you.”

They chatted for a little bit longer while Clarke finished her food and then announced she was going to bed.   
  


Bellamy tried his best to hide his disappointment but what did he think? That she would just ask him to come with her?

Standing up he started to make his way to his own room but before he could get there, she bumped into him.

”Oh sorry Clarke, I was just going to bed.”

”No I’m sorry I ran into you.”

The two kind of stood there awkwardly between their two doors before turning around.

He put his hand on the door before saying “Clarke?”

”Yeah?”

“If you need me you can always come in here. I have a king sized bed.”

A blush rose up on her cheeks before she stuttered.

”Ok.”

”Ok.”

She went on in to her room so he went in to his. About an hour later his door cracked open, and he heard her whisper.

”Bellamy?Are you asleep?”

Trying not to grin like a Cheshire Cat he responded.

”Yeah, what’s up?”

”I uh I can’t sleep.”

She shifted on her feet uncomfortably before he spoke up.

“Come here Clarke.”

With a sigh of resignation or relief he wasn’t sure she filled the spot where he’d pulled back the covers. This time she laid on her side and pulled his arm around her before scooting her back against his chest.

He met her halfway and wrapped his body around hers the way they used to sleep. A few minutes later he whispered goodnight, but she was already asleep.

The next night there wasn’t really a question he just got off the couch and extended his hand to which she accepted before following him to the room. After all these years it only took one night for them to realize how terrible they both slept when they were apart and for Bellamy to never want to be without her again.

Thursday Bellamy cleaned the house in preparation for their dinner with Octavia and called his chef to prepare steaks, vegetables, and potatoes with a side salad.   
  


It was right about time for Clarke to get home when someone knocked on the door. Confused he pulled it open.   
  


“Gina?”


	16. Chapter 16

Clarke couldn’t wait to get home after her long shift and was excited to be off for the next few days. She stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for their floor. Just as the doors were about to close a hand reached out and the doors reopened.   
  


A thin brunette stood on the other side before smiling.

“Whew I’m glad I caught this.”

Clarke only nodded and made room for the brunette to come inside. 

“The penthouse please.”

Since she’d already pressed the button prior Clarke made no move, to which her fellow passenger got an attitude.

”I said penthouse please.”

”It’s already been pressed.”

She shot Clarke a look of disgust at her scrubs before seemingly getting an idea in her head and smirking.

”Ohh.. You must be the new cleaning lady! I’m so glad Bellamy took my advice, that Linda lady always was kind of rude to me.”

Clarke resisted the urge to roll her eyes and instead decided to let the conversation play out.

”I think Linda is really nice, but you are who exactly?”

Her smirk grew even more annoying if possible as she boasted “I’m Gina, Bellamy Blake’s girlfriend if you didn’t know. Geeze, you must live under a rock!”

Clarke couldn’t help but let a small laugh escape. 

The elevator dinged before Gina could reply to Clarke’s laugh and Clarke held out her hand as to say go ahead.

Gina knocked on the door and waited proudly as if she was about to prove something and Clarke just stood back trying to keep from rolling on the floor in laughter.   
  


Bellamy opened the door and his face colored in surprise “Gina?”

She started to reply when Liv popped around the door, saw Clarke and ran into her arms.

”MOMMY !”

”Hey baby girl!! I missed you so much! Did you have fun with daddy today?”

”Yes! Yes!”

Gina looked back and forth between the three of them in confusion. “Mommy? Daddy?”

This time Bellamy cleared his throat and Clarke stepped around Gina into the house.

”Uh yeah, Gina this is Clarke and this is our daughter.”

Her eyes widened even further. “Your daughter, but you never said anything about a daughter?”

”I only just found out. Anyways is there something you needed, because we are getting ready for some guests.”

”I just thought we could talk maybe you had changed your mind since we talked on the phone.”

”Sorry Gina, I still feel the same. I hope you have a good night though. Sorry you came all this way.”

”But Bellamy.”

”Sorry I have to go.”

With that he closed the door leaving Gina in the hall. 

Clarke bent over in laughter and Bellamy shot her a confused look.

”What is so funny?”

”I’m sorry I’m sure she was nice or you wouldn’t have dated her but you broke up with her twice now and she still didn’t get the picture.”

Bellamy couldn’t help but laugh a bit too before stopping “Wait, how did you know that?”

”Your mom told me before she left and I overheard your last conversation with her on Saturday.”

”Oh well I’m glad you didn’t think I was still with her or anything because I can assure you it ended the moment I saw you. Besides that I was never really serious about her anyways. It wasn’t possible when I was in love with someone else.”

Clarke’s eyes snapped to his in a moment or seriousness before making an excuse to go change before Octavia and Lincoln got there.

She returned not too long after and started talking to Liv about the last few days and playing together on the floor with some dolls. Around five-thirty Octavia knocked on the door.

Bellamy got up to open it, he didn’t even say hi before Octavia asked “Where’s my niece?”

She didn’t even hesitate before rolling forward on this little scooter thing that held her foot up. Lincoln following calmly behind.  
  


Clarke picked Liv up before walking over. Octavia’s face lit up like a Christmas tree, and Lincoln wasn’t too far behind that.

”Octavia I’d like you to meet Livia, your niece. Livia this is your auntie O and Uncle Lincoln. Can you say hi?”

”Hi O, why is your foot and arm all covered up? Did you get a boo boo?”

”Yeah, but it’s ok, I’ll be better in just a few days.”

“Does it hurt?”

”Not too bad. Uncle Lincoln makes sure I sleep and rest so I can be ready to run again soon.”

”Yeah my mommy and daddy make me rest too, he says I’m not allowed to run until my boo boo is gone.”

”Well that’s a very good daddy. I brought you a present though do you want to open it?”

Livia’s eyes lit up before asking Clarke for silent permission. With a nod she set Liv on the ground and watched as Liv gently led Octavia to the couch. Lincoln brought the present over and Liv tore off the pink paper to reveal a glittering slime set.   
  


With a squeal Liv said “Thank you! I love it! Can I open it now?”

“Well it’s up to your mommy.”

Just then Clarke heard the dishes being placed on the table so she replied “How about we eat first and then you can play with Auntie O and Uncle Lincoln right after? I bet they would love it if you showed them how good you can eat.”

”Ok, yeah!”

Lincoln helped Octavia to the table and Clarke put Liv in her highchair. Octavia sat enthralled with her niece the entire dinner so Clarke and Bellamy talked to Lincoln. After dinner Liv couldn’t wait to play so Clarke let her down and she went straight to the slime. After dinner was cleaned Bellamy and Clarke sat on the floor and joined in playing until it was time for Livia to go to sleep. 

A few tears later and a promise to see Auntie O again soon Clarke took Livia to get changed. Soon after Clarke returned Octavia had to use the restroom and since Lincoln was in the guest she went into Clarke’s room.

She wheeled back out with an odd look on her face.

”Clarke?”

”Yeah?”

”Isn’t that your room?”

”Yeah...”

”Huh? Well it looks like there hasn’t been anyone in there in a few days.”

A blush colored Clarke’s cheeks before averting her eyes.

“Oh uh, that’s weird.”

“Yeah, so where do you sleep?”

At this point Octavia knew something was up because Clarke wasn’t looking at her and Bellamy had suddenly found the cabinets extremely interesting.

There wasn’t a reply so she just asked “Are you two sleeping together?”

Clarke turned even further away, so Bellamy answered “Not in the way you are thinking O.”

Octavia didn’t even try to hide her smile. “So what way is it then?”

”We just sleep in the same bed that’s it.”

”You sleep in the same bed? So are you back together?”

”No, I just sleep better.”

Octavia laughed and by this time Lincoln had rejoined the conversation.

”Oh I’m sure you do. You guys are so funny. You both still obviously love each other so why dance around it?”

Lincoln gave Octavia a look “Octavia.”

”Look I’m just calling it how I see it. All I’m gonna say is don’t wait too long, I’d really like another niece or nephew, one I could see from the beginning.”

This time Bellamy spit out his water and Clarke slapped him on the back while he coughed.

Octavia laughed. “Way to be dramatic about it. In any case let’s plan another dinner or I can come over all day and just hang out. I’m not back at work yet until I get the leg cast off at least.I’m so bored. We will let you guys go. Love you. Come on Lincoln.”

”Sorry guys, we will see you guys soon.”

Clarke replied “Love you see you next time.”

The door clicked signaling their departure and Clarke sighed in relief.

”Well that was interesting.”

Bellamy had regained his composure and mumbled “That’s O for ya.”

”I remember.”

”Good, I’m sorry for what she said though.”

”It’s fine Bellamy. Don’t worry about it. Let’s just watch a documentary before we go to bed.”

”Ok I’m gonna put on my pajamas and then I’ll meet you out there.”

”Me too.”

Once they were back on the couch they settled in comfortably. No words were exchanged they just sat there watching the documentary on the ocean. When it was over Clarke was up first and just went to what was now their room. Bellamy settled in beside her their backs to each other. She turned over to face him first before he did the same. They just stared at each other for a moment before Clarke spoke up.   
  


“Bellamy?”

”Yeah?”

”What do you think about what Octavia said?”

”Which part?”

”Do you still feel that way about me?”

”Clarke, are you sure you want the hear the answer? Because you already know.”

She thought about it for a moment before softly replying “I want to know.”

”Yes Clarke, I love you. I always have and I always will. It’s always been you. You’re it for me. I’m sorry if that’s a lot..”

”Bell I love you too, I never really stopped. I mean it hurt me but no matter how much I tried, I could never get you out of my heart.”

With one swift tug Bellamy had pulled her against him and their lips crashed together. It was like coming home again. They moved together in tandem their kiss rising in intensity before Clarke pulled back smiling. 

“Bell I love you but I’m not ready for that second baby yet and I’m not on birth control.”

He looked at her before laughing and pulling her in for a hug. That night they slept together in complete peace.

**_Epilogue_ **

  
“Liv! Come on time to go meet the new baby!”  
  


”Coming Auntie O!”

They pulled up to the hospital and Liv stayed tucked under her aunt’s arm as they avoided the paparazzi.

The media had swarmed like bees when Clarke and Bellamy had eloped not long after that night where Octavia met Livia. They’d not been as bad until they got wind of the new baby. Now two years since the wedding Liv’s baby brother was finally here.

Octavia steered Liv through the maternity ward to Clarke’s room and they pushed the door open. Liv immediately running into Bellamy’s open arms.

”Daddy!”

“Hey love bug! We missed you.”

”I missed you! I had fun though! Is Auggie here?”

Clarke smiled and turned the little blue bundle to where Liv could see.

”Wow! He’s so little!”

”Yeah and you have to be so careful.”

”I promise I will daddy! I love him already!”

”That’s good because I bet he loves you too. Now sit still so you can say hi.”

The family glowed with happiness finally being complete again. This time no one or no thing would separate them. 


End file.
